Monarchy of the Ancients

Monarchy of the Ancients

by faciex_prima

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content
  • Traumatising content

(Story is under hiatus, for now. I'll be preparing a backlog worth 10 chapters and improving older chapters.)

Meet Phoenix V. Amber, a teenager whose ancestors were the founding members of the Kingdom of Raycania. As he went about his day in his barn, a mysterious letter appeared in his mailbox, informing him of his ascension to the Crown. Being the only known successor left, he forced himself to accept his fate.

As per the tradition set in stone for generations, he must now assemble the new generation of Raycanian Mythics, whom he will lead as their King. A simple task had been bestowed upon them, the defense of all four corners of the Kingdom from any possible threat.

Peace once again prospered within the Kingdom when all of a sudden, problems threatening the Kingdom rose one after another. From unknown enemies holding a coup to long and blood rivalries that have haunted the Amber Bloodline for hundreds of years. Will he carry forth the torch of the monarchy, or will he crumble down under the weight of problems?

Perhaps inheriting the Crown... was a terrible idea.

/***/

[Participant in the Royal Road Writathon Challenge]
(Starting from 001 - 003 [ACT II])

Updates weekly every Sunday, 11:30 PM GMT+8 Time.
(This schedule has currently been halted in order to create a backlog for daily updates.)
NOTE: This story is a rewrite of a story that went by the same name.

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faciex_prima

faciex_prima

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Cocop (Cale Plamann)
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

This is an interesting story because there are elements I really like and elements that make it struggle.  In recommending this, I want the caveat to very much be "so long as you can get past the word usage/stylistic issues."

That said, there are some hints of a fun and fast light novel hiding in this story.  I think the author is on the right track and I really hope they can refine and polish it until it is there.  The aesthetic and 'anime feel' of a fun story of the new prince/king and his friends having to protect his kingdom against nefarious plots seems fertile ground for a story.

Style
This story is written to be fast and fun with a focus on a cast of unique characters.  That said, it clashes with a ponderous writing style, long chapters and some questionable word choice issues.  It sounds like the author is working on ironing out the kinks so hopefully by the time you read this, these problems will be in the rearview.

Grammar
Not going to lie, the grammar is a bit rough.  There tense confusion issues, missing words, confusing descriptions, and just generally a strange 'off' feeling to how the words are chosen/used.  If grammar is a dealbreaker for you, you should probably move on from this story.

Story
We're in the early stages of the story, but I very much like the simple but fun trajectory of the plot so far.  In addition, does a good job of introducing a fairly complex world that feels lived in and developed.  I ended my read eager to know more about the universe of the novel.

Character
The characters are a bit tropey, but they all feel different and real.  I feel like a story focusing on them, their development and their interaction has alot of potential as they seem like a fun bunch