Soul Power 9999
I... don't remember how I died. Or anything else, really.
I don't know who... what I am, what this dark space I am in is, or why the souls all around me are looking at me.
But I do know that if the world starts falling apart, escaping comes first, even before listening to the messages that keep ringing inside my head. I only really remember the first one:
[The [Simplification Process] has begun.]
And so, while the world was doing a 180, I was stuck deep underground as an incorporeal soul, absorbing the essences of thousands others like me who had been torn to shreds just to prevent myself from dissipating, and trying desperately to go up while recovering jumbled up memories from my past.
I did try to posses monsters to gain a physical body, but...
It seems my soul got too powerful to be shackled down by a vessel.
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The story is well enough as we follow an OP soul trying to find a body. There is humor, some basic actions, sequences, decent world building and fairly cool monsters. My blessing and curse though is logic, if too many things don't make sense or aren't explained I can't really get into it.
The premise for the apocalypse/system is that it simplified everything. Cool idea, no guns cars houses tech etc. Great way to hard reset civilization. But microorganisms are also destroyed? But humans are vastly more complex and also not destroyed?
Then the MC finds a robot made by a mad alchemists to inhabit. Cool but if the point was to simplify, how does this qualify to exist? Even books were deleted, does this mean humanity had to revert to oral traditions?
If the system deleted the supernatural why not delete all supernatural but instead it targets only the things in supernatural realms?
I understand the story needs to happen and all but its too inconsistent for my liking.
Thank you Plus1 for your contribution to RR and best luck to you in the future.
The premise is very original and had me liking the story from the start.
I however have a problem with the intermission that came out of nowhere
there was so much for the mc to try out before giving up (specifically magic or searching for his ma)
and all that time spend doing so little is just sad.
To sum it up: I'm grumpy about the untapped potential beeing lost.
It's a good story, there are a few OP soul stories out there but not many. I have a couple problems with it though. One is the leveling. It's completely inconsistent with what has actually happened. Second, it's been 2100 years since the system apocalypse but people are still living in mud hut and log walled villages. Third, some logic gaps that are small, but glaring, for example, saying he has mountainous weight...then having him crawl on mud hut roofs made of sticks. Fourth, making MC basically 1 step above an idiot in terms of basic intelligence and thought processes. It's very annoying to read stories where the author has the MC be an idiot just so they can show growth through a story easier. Fifth and final issue, frequent but minor spelling and grammar issues that can be caught by a basic proofread.
Overall, good concept, but I would recommend the author be a bit more concientous with the internal logic, especially with a system novel where small inconsistencies are easily revealed and can add up to a huge mess really fast.
Its gonna be short because I don 't have a lot of thing to say (obviously).
The idea is nice, soul looking for a vessel etc I like it (won t spoil si jot much to say).
What I don t like where the character interaction so far. Its feel rly poor. Every character so far have been use for 5 lines then discard. Except for the last one. But the last one lack a personality, a reason to exist in the story (dialog etc are useless so far with it. Could have been a tool without a soul take less lines of filling). And he also lack a brain (Last character is a idiot. He/She is mean to be it. But dialog with a useless idiot feel boring to me).
Could be great if the interactions beetween character are improve later. And will stay average if not.
Sorry bad english is all. (Got no idea if the grammar is correct or not, do i wont review it).
Nice day to all
It is a really interesting concept, and I think that once it gets more chapters, it will bloom into a great story. It has a lot of great elements and is a unique story that I find interesting. I love to see where it will go and hope that the author will keep up the great work. Additionally, I like how the character is overpowered without being able to crush everbody but but is overpowered in a way that allows the character to still have challenges, especially in his robot form where he will have to confront many problems that come with being a robot.
Thoughts Would recommend
Okay you may wonder why such a clear power fantasy "based on the title" would warrant such a high rating. Il tell you (since this is a review). First il say this is a very well thought out story, the characters are interesting although they are very cliche. But for a story based on a commonly degraded trope following a cliche story line this has been a light in the trash heap power fantasy's normally are. I would recommend reading it.
The only reason it's not a 5 is because it's both a cliche story and uses the writers crutch know as "The system" but hey it's not destroying the story so he's done well so far. It's got a bit of flare the author has style in his writing, well written, and smartly done.
Definetly the weakness of this novel the story is not existent it really is just a bargain bin story that puts the character into the world with little care for before during and after the story. The world building it a little on the weak side for my taste. Non the less they have woven the character into the story like a well strung tapestry which in and of its self is not a easy take. Easier to make a alien to the story to escape doing it.
All but impeccable. Clearly been gone over 1 of more times to check spelling, grammar. It's a very strong foundation With little unneeded words. Not perfect mind you the story could use some more creative language and descriptive language but the grammar is very good.
A interesting and strong charector I'm a little biased I like the charector, although I don't like how his memory's are basicly gone it feels like a cheap get out of jail free card. Aside from that he's a funny likeable charector with clear charectoristics. His lack of goal some would say is a bad thing I'm not sure so far. Although the arm thing is definitely a engineered power boost I'm calling it. Probably a even better weapon.
Variation in language I think would improve the charector you introduce a lot of them sound the same, we all know the same person is writing all the charectors so varying up speech patterns is a difficult skill but definedly something to practise
This review is my opinion and my opinion only, I'm not a creditors author or language teacher I just like this story and hope this review aids you in either choosing to read of not or helping in your own personal views
A decent story, fun and a good power fantasy, not amazing, not a must read but definitely something I'd put on the bored list for a rainy day. I will personally be putting it on a list and catch up here and there but I won't be following it chapter by chapter. The hook is not that strong.