Re:Martial Monarch

by Rasum

Original ONGOING Action Adventure Fantasy Romance High Fantasy Magic Martial Arts Reincarnation War and Military
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore

If you want to remind me to write because I am kinds lazy and need people to remind me to write. If you also want to get notified real fast when new chap comes join my discord:

https://discord.gg/V5gjTt6

Once, Wulan saved the world with his strength under the envied title of Solar Martial Monarch. He ruled the worlds with his Martial Arts, but on that fateful day, ten of his closest friends, the Nether Emperors, betrayed and killed him in his weakened state after a long battle, they did not just kill him but including his best friend too..

Eight thousand years later, Wulan was reborn into the body of a child, possessing not only his Martial skill but also a talent for magic. His path to revenge may be a quick one, but who knows?

The Nether Emperors may have roots in darker places than just one continent...

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  • Pages :
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Rasum

Rasum

Rasum

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duhbigotaku
Overall

This is your classic strong guy reincarnated with new power story. Nothing wrong with that. It's not a bad concept, the story so far is decent, grammar isn't terrible. But there is one main glaring issue. The author notes in the middle of paragraphs.

First, if you have to use an author note to tell me what to visualize, you've done a bad job of writing. When you pause the whole story to say "Imagine it kind of like {reference to scene in popular anime}" you've failed as an author.

Second, author notes interrupt the flow of the story. I can suspend my disbelief pretty hard. I can really enjoy some truly crappy movies, tv shows, and books. But as soon as you pull me out with an author note (or editor note), I'm going to start noticing and focusing on the cracks, because I'm no longer in a flow. I'm going to start nitpicking the way you put too many dots on your elipses. I'm going to start questioning the plot. If I notice this stuff after I've finished reading, it doesn't really matter anymore because I've enjoyed the story and clearly they didn't interfere with that joy. But when it's in the middle of the book, it's a real problem.

Finally, stop fighting with your editor. In fact, editor is the wrong word. You two clearly need to write different stories. The author notes are so often insulting the "editor" and complaining that it's not your book anymore. And you're right, if your editor is taking over the story, they're not the editor, they're a different author. You released two different versions of the same chapter because your editor didn't like the author version so wrote their own. That's not an editor. An editor helps to enhance your version, not go off and do their own thing. When your notes call parts cringey, saying you don't like them, etc. you're not only just insulting your work partner, drawing the reader out of the story, and complicating everything. It undermines everything as it starts to feel like I'm reading two different books. You are the author you're supposed to get final say, if you don't like a part you can change it. When you don't and instead add an author note complaining about a part of your OWN BOOK, something has gone wrong.

If everything get's cleaned up, this isn't a bad story. But as it is right now, I couldn't get past chapter 12. It may get good later, but if it's so bad up to the point I can't continue, there's no point to it being good later.

Orphicle
Overall

Was this written by a third grader. Its full of tropes and the mc is brain dead despite being over 500 years old. It makes no sense . Everything is cliche and there is no real substance. I think this is a rewrite but if its this bad I can't imagine the first version.

Sunpika
Overall

There's not much else to say. It's alright / good, ok grammar, ok characters, ok magic system etc.

My only complaint is the pacing, it seems a bit slow, but it isn't a major problem, just a little annoying. The baby steps are important, but progression even more so

Overall, it has a good foundation to go from good to great and it is something I would definitely reread when it finishes

 

4/5

MT01
Overall

Can’t Stop (until I need to sleep)

Reviewed at: Chapter 14: Unila and Luna?

Before I start with the review I must say that this story is a great piece of writing and extremely fun to read. At first, I thought it was one of the mediocre novels, but I later found myself reading chapter to chapter on my first day reading this novel. I binge read it for around four hours and could not stop until chapter 15 or so because its late and I need to sleep. I honestly didn't expect much at the start, but I'm glad I kept reading so that I could find such a great piece of work.

Stratothrax
Overall

If you like power fantasy and revenge power xianxia then you will like this, definitely genre candy for a fan. The main characters 'rule-breaking' power is an interesting one and actually quite well thought out as it does not break any of the worlds core rules unlike many xianxia style stories on royal road. It combines genre staples Mana and Qi and puts our MC on a satisfying revenge path full of gratifying justice punishing those who need to be punished for their evil ways.

Worth a look if you are into this kind of thing, kudos to the author. Nice work.

Dakie Salamander
Overall

A story about betrayed and then reincarnated Solar Martial Emperor, Wulan. The world has two powers: Mana and Qi, aka Maguses and Cultivators. The MC is of course completely overpowered, having both powers. A classical path of revenge written as xianxia, at least for my understanding.

Style: Third-person omnipresent past/present tense.

Grammar: A few mistakes here and there, nothing flow-breaking

I will definiitely follow this story as I am quite a sucker for this type. 

D.C.Veiling
Overall

A very thought-through storyline with likeable characters. I would love to read the story in the original language but it's worth to read in English. The Characters are alive and relatable, creating a living environment that will surely captivate as much as the characters do. I won't spoiler anything but you only need to get to the second chapter to decide whether this story is for you or not. A Genre fan will  see the work which was put into it immeditely and stay for the plot.  

Take a look at it yourself and get inspired by the work of this young Indie Authout. Great work, author!

Primate
Overall

A beautifully written novel in third person POV, following the tale of Wulan, the solar martial mornarch, who was killed in his previous life but was reincarnated into the body of a fifteen year old kid. The story line is wonderfully plotted, and the story develops accordingly. The grammar is of high quality, the worldbuilding is on point, and the characters are a joy to read.

Excellent work author, keep it up.

Fancyotter98
Overall

The story of an ancient warrior, betrayed by those closest to him, find himself reincarnated thousands of years later into the body of child. Now he must remaster his ancient powers and go on mystical adventures!

The writing is decent for tho he improves over the course of the story and I got a kick from the mysticism and magic. I feel this story has potential. Worth checking out if you are a fan of chinese action/ animation!

Considering the author's experience in writing, I see lots of potential. Im giving it 5 stars now because I think with improvement, he can go real far as a writer!