Changing World

by Blue-dragon95

Original HIATUS Fantasy Tragedy Female Lead Gender Bender Harem LitRPG Magic Reader interactive
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Sexual Content

Our MCs life changes upside down when the world 'system' activates. Join her and her online guild-mates on their new life. A/N: Mature tag is there just in case. Looking for a PR if anyone wants to do it just pm me.

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
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  • Ratings :
  • 23
  • Pages :
  • 132
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Phantom Writer

Word Count (VII)
5th Anniversary
Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
The Prologue ago
Chapter One – Just Why? ago
Chapter Two – Attack of the Bunny... ago
Chapter Three – Kali Mishap ago
Chapter Four - Fate ago
Chapter Five – Big Views ago
Chapter Six – When a Wolf Demi-human and a Succubus approach a Draconian... ago
Chapter Seven – Bloody Pain... ago
Chapter Eight – Light Wolf and Mates? ago
Chapter Nine – Nya? ago
Chapter Ten – No... ago
Creatures (Yes it's not a Chapter) ago
Chapter Eleven – Roar I'm a Tiger Baby ago
Chapter Twelve – A Goddess’s Wrath ago
Chapter Thirteenth – Something Big Is Going On ago
Chapter Fourteen – The Chocolate Is All MINE! ago
Chapter Fifteen – Meeting and Chocolate ago
Chapter Sixteen – Darkening Sky ago
Chapter Seventeen – Training Dungeon ago
Chapter Eighteen – Mana Poisoning ago
Chapter 19 – Tamer of Beasts ago
Chapter Twenty – A New Girl ago
Chapter Twenty-one - Elora ago
Chapter Twenty-two – Memory of the Goddess #1 ago
Twenty-three – Memory of the Goddess #2 ago
Characters (Not a Chapter) ago
Chapter Twenty-four – The Start of Being Violated ago
Chapter Twenty-five – Being Violated (18+) ago
Chapter Twenty-six – Eloraaaa! ago
Chapter Twenty-seven – The Shadowstar Twins (18+) ago
Chapter Twenty-eight – That it! ago
Chapter Twenty-nine – Little Mouse, Little Mouse ago

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This is my first time trying to semi-review something but here I go. You're writing isn't perfect and could use some work but that itself is good as it leaves you room to grow as an author and if you continue to improve it would make a great story.

Now for the problems: I have found three noteworthy problems most obvious is grammar and spelling. Sometimes what the characters are saying don't make sense  and just serve to confuse the reader. I recommend just re-reading over the chapter to catch those now spelling is even easier if you're finding you're self unsure as to how to spell a word just type it into google and spell check it.

Next is pacing you need to find a nice steady rhythm and keep at the pace with the occasional time skip when needed.

Last but not least, character depth, a big problem I've found with most stories is that they make characters flat and 2-D and don't add any personality to it and that can ruin a book. You're MC just takes everything at face value without any fear. Ex. Getting transported somewhere she's unfamiliar with she acts level headed. However when you do try to add emotion to her character it seems forced. Ex. Her guild yelling at her and she cries herself to sleep. Why did she go through something but have almost no visible effect on the story the following morning? Plus why was their no reaction when she just literally became a god?! I think it at least warrants a gasp or something.

Now don't get me wrong I love the story and hope you continue it because honestly I love the concept and the story, I just think you need a little nudge to help you improve

  • Overall Score

The good:  As a story, its not bad.  The plot is interesting.  Most of the characters seem good if silly.  And its readable - in other words the writing itself isn't filled with errors.  


The bad:  I personally just hate weak-willed pushover MCs.  This is the only reason this story isn't one of my favorites.  I mean, its to the point that its almost not even believable.  A goddess impregnates her as a punishment.  Forces soulmates on her.  Changes the MC's race into something where she loses control of herself.  And just watches as she is raped by out of control friends.  If it was me those 'friends' would be guild-kicked and I would be cursing that goddess till my dying breath.  I honestly can't comprehend someone that would just go along with it.  Its shocking to the point that it kind of ruins my sense of immersion for the story itself.


Putting both together... its not my favorite story, but its a decent read.  Someone that doesn't have a problem with weak-willed MCs might even consider it really good.

  • Overall Score

OK thx runebane and screw you author

I typed a whole review about how messed up the author is and that runebane should worrie about some other points instead of the pushover MC wich shouldnt even matter anymore at this point.


To bad the review was to long so as i submited it it didnt get saved so i dont want to write it again.

Shame on you author for not putting in the mature and tragedy and maybe even gore/rape taggs.


  • Overall Score

As the title says, its a decent start to a rpg world event, very reader interactive good and ok dialog, not much character development yet, and most of it has been for the MC, but it could be really good over all cannot wait to see where it goes.


This review was broguth to you by  the dyslexic wonder if you can read/understand it good on ya if not I don't care complain to some one who give a fuck.