Stuck In This Place And All I Have To Do Is Kill This Colossus
James Jacob Smith has found himself in purgatory. After his death, his soul was deemed too pure to be cast into hell, but he committed too many sins to be allowed into heaven. In purgatory, your sins are given physical form, and you must overcome them to enter paradise. Failure means that your sins were too much, and you will be damned to eternal torment.
Failure is not an option for James. In the car accident that killed him, his wife died before he did. Since she's not here, she could only have passed right into heaven. Reuniting with her is his all-consuming goal. Nevermind that the physicaly manifestation of his sins is a giant monster the size of an office building. Tackling such a task is going to take some planning. But what other option does he have?
He's stuck in this place. And all he has to do is kill that colossus.
- Overall Score
- Style Score
- Story Score
- Grammar Score
- Character Score
- Total Views :
- Average Views :
- Followers :
- Favorites :
- Ratings :
- Pages :
Leave a review
Okay, So I'll start off by saying that almost everything about this story requires you to read to at least chapter 7 before you grow to like it. The world, the characters or the random Japanese words. But once you hit that point, For me it was around chapter Seven, then you'll absolutely love this book.
The world-building is actually pretty weak for the book, and the author uses a lot of references that if you've never heard of them make understanding the lore of this world quite difficult. HOWEVER, the setting itself, as in where the main cast operates is very easy to understand and lends itself easily to create tension and trials for the main cast to overcome.
The characters take a lot of warming up to, especially the main character, who up until chapter five all we know about him is that He's tall, He's a loudmouth and he loves his Wife, a lot. Like, that one fact makes up about 70% of his personality, rationale, and reaction to anything. It's not bad as you get into it, but its hard to get used to. I personally tend to dislike loudmouthed and somewhat rude characters but the author managed to sell the main character's charm to me.
The other characters start off feeling like thin archetypes, but the more you get to know them, the deeper you get to fall in love with them.
Honestly out of all the strengths of this novel, I'll have to claim the characters as its strongest.
The writing is well done, and there are very few if any technical mistakes (note that I wasn't particularly reading for technical mistakes.). The only issue I'll really bring up is the author's love of real-world references in place of explanations and the rare but offputting insertions of random Japanese words as humour. It stopped after a while, but they really threw me off.
All in all, its a great novel and I look forward to reading more of it in the future!
This is a story of a dead man's struggle in purgatory. His attempt to overcome the sin holding him there and dealing with the other people living there. His task is to slay a colossus.
I would say the biggest issue I see with this story is how the protagonist goes at it. I don't want to spoiler the details, but he aquires gear to slay the giant in melee combat. To be honest this feels more like "The Legends of Zelda: Purgatory" than something a reasonable protagonist would have done.
That's basically the other "problem". The MC just isn't very reasonable. Frequently enough he feels like a "determinator" trope or a protagonist from some action video game. But that's my personal view. A character should have flaws, I just couldn't help to find his attitude particularly annoying.
Finally there is little background about the character and that's taking a lot of depth that might have made his flaws otherwise acceptable. We don't really know where he's coming from. The only thing he cares about is his wife. But she's more a concept of wifely perfection rather than a real person. "Alice would have known, Alice would have done." There should have been more to her than the MCs obsession. For a soulmate what we learn of her is pretty one dimensional.
While these do sound like big flaws, the story also has big strenghts. The author manages to have an MC that's obsessed with getting to his wife, still be a moral person who manages to care for the people around them. He's not some edgy anti-hero scum like many authors here would be tempted to make him.
Secondly the plot of this story is very much compelling. You want to see Alex succeed, you suffer with him during his failures and enjoy his sucesses.
Finally unlike most webnovels this story has an end. Even better, at the point where you feel like the story should find it's finish, it's really ending. So yeah, it's a complete story for you to enjoy.
Nice, short story (at least for this site) that is actually done.
I quite enjoyed the story, but critisim is easier than praise, so here is some nitpicking:
The main character, James, is a bit of a cardboard whose only personality trait is 'muh wife' and not much else.
I don't even know how old James is supposed to be...
My best guess anywhere between 25-45
The 'wife' doesn't actually feel like a person, but a plot device.
The lacking background of the couple hindered my ability to care about Jame's struggle.
However that the story isn't as fleshed out as it could've been, doesn't matter because it's done and short and adding more detail could have made it too long/messed with the pace.
Well done Author!
This story isn't perfect. There are things here or there that could be improved on. Some of the characters seem to trust far too easily, like NPCs in a videogame just letting the MC dictate the pace of their life. Some of the challenges that the MC faces feel rather toothless, like you're not really expecting anything actually bad to happen. This isn't at all souls-esque, you won't have the MC beaten to bloody death because they stumbled upon something out of their league. But sometimes that's okay too, you don't always need brutally unforgiving.
But, it's still a very, very good story.
The world is very basic. The small details aren't teased out by the MC, because the MC doesn't really care about that. There's no in depth explanation of the way that the world works, and that's fine. The story isn't about that. It's 50 chapters of the MC trying to get back to his Wife, no matter what. Somewhat bare, but still serviceable.
The characters, though, are very well done. You don't get an infodump about them giving you their full background in chapter 2, and some things you never end up knowing. But you still end up actually caring about the characters, even if they feel paper thin when they're first introduced.
The style was a tiny bit annoying at first, but you very quickly get used to it. You need to google a few references here or there if you don't know what Grond is, but that's part of the fun.
The story is flawed, but once you've finished it you know that the good bits far outweigh any of the flaws, and I can't wait until KLSpacer writes something else
The start of the story is very good the story feels refreshing and the writing is very good.
I would highly recommend reading it.
I cant even put it in enough words for an advanced review, so this has to do.
This story gave me an absolutely amazing read, brought me to think about a lot of critical things in an unexpected way and the all around feel of this story, the drive and the ending, its overwhelming pure and nice.
Give it a try, do yourself the favor, even for a casual read its i great story.
Thank you, dear author.
excellent story thats complete and satisfyng. Definetly dont regret picking this up and its nice reading something on the site with an actual ending 10/10 would recomend. The characters are memorable qith a setting that lets them flourish the story remains consistent with no sudden miracles to help the mc out.
While it has a bit of a rocky start, this is definitely one of the best short(ish) stories I've ever read. It actually having an ending is an aspect that some other authors should think about implementing in their stories :) . James is a bit flat as a character but he propels the story in a way that few MCs ever manage. Good writing KLSpacer!