Artificial Jelly

by Materia-Blade

Original ONGOING Adventure Fantasy Sci-fi Tragedy Dungeon Female Lead GameLit LitRPG Low Fantasy Non-Human lead Strategy Virtual Reality
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Profanity

Born to die and be born again, Gell, the Jellyfae must discover her strange connection to the horrible monsters called humans, that speak with words she understands, but seem to want nothing but her death. Driven by a desire for safety and freedom, she ventures forth to Tread the Sky, and finds more worlds than one.

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Materia-Blade

Materia-Blade

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Valkemin
  • Overall Score

really good, sadly theres no more chapters!!!!!!!! NOOOO

Lunar Dream
  • Overall Score

 Keep up the good work! I cant wait to read more. Definitely one of the better novels on this site.

RoadStone
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Read it if you like the premise

Reviewed at: Another Kind of Flight

The main concept of the book: An NPC developed conscience and went exploring. So far, the story itself is interesting.
The grammar is good: there are no errors that are noticeable.
The characters are interesting to observe: they have their own needs and act accordingly.
The style is skippable: you will find yourself more than once in a situation when you don't want to read through a big paragraph that could've been changed to a short sentence without losing anything. This is the one annoyance that I had when reading this book.

Overall, that's a story with a good idea, interesting characters, invisibly good grammar, and sometimes boring paragraphs that could be skipped. I recommend it if you like the premise.

 

 

Gridinad
  • Overall Score

I love this story, the pacing is phenomenal and Materia Blade knows how to put emotion into her characters qnd thier dialogue. I heartily recommend it to anyone.

Skelatox
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Unique, Well-Written Story with Engaging Characters Takes Disappointing Turn

Reviewed at: Another Kind of Flight

   I wish to preface this by saying that the first fifteen or sixteen chapters of this story are amazing. The reader is originally presented with the unusual perspective of Gell, a strange, freshly budding intelligence. Gell swiftly makes clear her boredom, not only at the repetitive, quiet life she lives in her dungeon home, but at being the only member of her family who seems capable of experiencing boredom. In fact, as far as she is aware, none of the rest of her family seem capable of experiencing anything, simply following the static routines of their lives in an endless loop.

   This changes suddenly, when the mononous routine is broken by a force from the outside world. This is the introduction of an antagonist in the form of Red Thorn, and not only does she leave a terrifying impact on the mind of Gell, but also those of the readers. From the perspective of Gell, Red Thorn is a horrifying monster, a sadistic demon who revels in Gell's torment. But from the reader's perspective, Red Thorn is... themself. She is a deeply relatable individual, who is simply unaware of the consequences of her actions at large, and reacts much like most people would. 

   The interplay between these two characters builds up the story to have huge potential, until disaster strikes. Without going too deeply into spoilers, the story suddenly takes a turn, in a much more generic direction. It is too early to tell, but it appears that this new direction will discard many of the aspects that originally hooked readers, and that feels slightly tragic in its own right. I intend to keep reading, and will update this review accordingly, but as things stand, this reviewer does not feel optimistic.

Blind Snot Dragon
  • Overall Score

The story is good, well written but should come with a slice-of-life tag. The story progression is there it's just slow, little bits and pieces that take a whole chapter and I hope that they mean something later bc they currently don't.

I'm happy to read it, happy to rate it, happy to follow it but I'm not excited and waiting for the next chapter to drop. There is too much hinting, not enough follow through on said hinting to really engage me in this story.

Onyavar
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An AI with a conscience.

Reviewed at: Lingering Instinct

I try to not rate stories that high until the chapter count is much higher, but this is a wonderful story so far.

The MC is a 'monster' in a dungeon game, who hates her life of being abused as XP fodder... no. That's a bad summary that doesn't do the story justice. Read it yourself already!

If that didn't convince you yet: here are my thoughts (for a change before I read other reviews or opinions on the story)

Great and solid worldbuilding, or at least the start of it: 3/5, because we haven't seen much of the world yet. Most importantly, everything in the world seems consistent so far. The story score would be rated 4/5 at my current point of reading, due to its internal consistency, and its quite good originality. (others had similar ideas before, but this felt still like a unique approach) One point from worldbuilding spills over: 5/5

The MC is Gell who has gone through quite some hell, but other characters like Red Thorn, or that developer guy, were also totally believable in their characters, and more than just 2d cutouts, despite only meeting them shortly. Then the elderly couple... Yep, at least 4/5 again, and a worldbuilding point flowing over.

Style score. Hm, everyone has their own writing style. And I'm not sure if I've gotten the style of this story yet. This could still turn ugly, but the latest trend in the chapters has been uplifting Gell's adorability+innocence score a lot. No, in doubt I'm rating 4/5 in style. Yet. This slot gets the third worldbuilding point spillover.

Grammar? I didn't find any obvious mistakes, and the writing was excellent. Full marks on its own.

Well, this story isn't finished, or even fully started yet. Also not Mother of Learning, which is the only story I've given 5 stars yet, after it ended (albeit it deserved even a few more).

Time will tell: I'm bookmarking this story and will see if it rises up to that lofty level, or if I was just dazzled by that beautiful unicorn in the latest chapter. Yes people, there are dazzling unicorns to be had. Which are epic mounts, as I hear people saying.

5 stars in each category, 4.5 in total until the ending blows my mind.

Apple Juice was taken
  • Overall Score

if you can read try reading

 

if you cant then why are you here

 

i am apple juice

 

and i am a drinkable liquid that tastes like apple's juice

Gompman
  • Overall Score

Peanut-butter Gelly

Reviewed at: Hidden Gell

I found this story kind of stale and boring. I often find myself wondering why I am still reading, when the MC isn't at all interesting, and doesn't even have the intellect of a human.

Some people like reading about a little child speaking child language chasing humans in a game, in a search for emotion and relations. Those people are not me, because nothing made me invested in this Gelly.

The mystery aspect was also not interesting enough to keep me reading.

SecCcat
  • Overall Score

I have thoroughly enjoyed the story so far. It is cute and well written, a very entertaining read. I will update my review when I have read to the current chapter. Need fifty words topost this review gah... so annoying... I guess this should be enough now.

 

P.S.    Mr. Wing please don't remove my too-short/non-review review! :P