VIEWPOINT-BLOOM

VIEWPOINT-BLOOM

by I Don't Bite...

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Traumatising content

This is the story of Chitra. A girl born blind, living her life in a world of darkness. This is a story of her and Finitum. The unique full-dive VRMMORPG that brought a new beginning to her life, brought her new meetings, partings, emotions, and adventure. A game that made light bloom in her dark world.

follow her journeys through the mysterious and magic-filled game that changed her life! The gameā€¦

The game...

Is Finitum really just a simple game?

Check out my discord server...

Temporary synopsis. I hate writing synopsis. Well, this is my second work. It's still in the draft phase, but please enjoy...

Cover by Adsterhappy...

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Author
I Don't Bite...

I Don't Bite...

I Don't Bite...

Achievements
Writathon Royal Road 2019 winner
8th Anniversary
350 Comments
50,000 Views
Word Count (12)
Faith in the Internet
Royal Writathon October 2020 winner
400 Followers
15 Reviews
30 Review Upvotes
Top List #1000
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Table of Contents
46 Chapters
Chapter Name Release Date
1. Illustrations and other stuff ago
2. Chitra and Akanksha ago
3. The budding hope ago
4. Chitra and Vikash ago
5. A new beginning ago
6. Those who watch ago
7. An agreement ago
8. Character Creation ago
9. Advent ago
10. Thoringar's Test ago
11. Search ago
12. You only relive once (Part- 1) ago
13. You only relive once (Part- 2) ago
14. Return ago
15. Rescue Preparations ago
16. Haphazard Strategy ago
17. Marcus ago
18. Elsewhere (Extra: Part 1) ago
19. Elsewhere (Extra: Part 2) ago
20. A Den of Thieves (Part- 1) ago
21. A Den of Thieves (Part- 2) ago
22. Knight's Honor ago
23. The Duel and The Witness ago
24. Conclusion ago
25. Entrusting ago
26. An Unwelcome News ago
27. Celebration and Bad News ago
28. The Watcher in The Dark ago
29. Death is Blue and Goblins are Green ago
30. Breaking hearts ago
31. Shattered Love ago
32. Grief ago
33. Hunt (Part- 1) ago
34. Hunt (Part- 2) ago
35. First Chat ago
36. Indecision ago
37. Decision ago
38. Esteriel ago
39. Last Errand (Part- 1) ago
40. Last Errand (Part- 2) ago
41. Lazy Day, Tense Night ago
42. Knightly Conduct ago
43. Meeting of Minds ago
44. Immortal Dilemma ago
45. Reentrance ago
46. Reasonable Discussion (Part- 1) ago

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Reviews
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Stillness
Overall
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Story
Grammar
Character

If you've read Data Dragon Danika this story is about similar, if darker. If you haven't, then this is the story of a blind girl who enters a virual world and can see for the first time. It is way more than that though. The characters are the best part of the story. They feel real, with genuine love and conflict between them.  The virtual world also feels very real, like action have consequences and things matter. I like how the main character treats the world like her own. She doesn't even realize there are game elements because she has never played a game due to her blindness. As for the things I disliked, there are three. First, side character view points didn't have the same emotional depth to them and, as a result, were boring. Second, the begining of the story showed a blind person being incompetent in where they were going. They are not. Blind doesn't mean stupid. There are a lot of non-visual clue to guide someones way. The author seemed to want the begining to end a certain way, which is fine, just the way the story got there was unrealistic. Third, the AI in the story are assholes and given way to much power, such as the ability to ignore user privacy at a whim. None of these are deal breakers despite how much I dislike them. I'm really enjoying the main character's story and look forward to her growth as a person.

HMiruko
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Putting something new to the table

Reviewed at: 24. Conclusion

First of all, the story presented a unique idea splendidly. Not only did it use blindness, a sensitive topic that can easily go wrong, as its core premise, it did so without romanticizing it. Rather than centering the drama about Chitra being blind, it's been treated as another trait. Something as trivial as her father being a spendthrift, and that's a huge plus in my book.

In terms of style and grammar, the scenese were presented in a very vivid and easy to imagine manner. There's really little to say to this. It's a very well written piece with little to no mistakes.

Again, the story doesn't follow the typical LitRPG path of action and bloodbath. Don't get me wrong. The story doesn't lack any action. It's just that it feels like the action is more like additional topping to an already scrumptious cake. 

Finally, Chitra, our headstrong and reckless to the point of stupidity princess. I've already said what's to be said about her being blind, so I'll skip on that. She was a girl with a good head on her shoulders, at least during most times. After she gained vision, however, she seemed to be making one reckless/stupid decision. I do get that she's not accustomed to sight yet, but it still feels like she makes a tad of dumb choices at times. 

Mirrond
Overall

While it is too early to make a detailed review of the story, I decided to leave my own input on the story - with full intention to edit this review into a proper one once the story gets longer. 

Let me be frank - this is a very good story. The prose is decent, and the idea is very interesting. Besides, at least thus far, the author seems capable of making his characters (at least the protagonist, it's not enough time for the others to have a lot of screentime) feel sufficiently realistic. 

In short - reading this story is a good idea :P 

ShadeByTheSea
Overall

The story seems well written and none of the characters so far seem cookie cutter. It's just going down a much hasher and darker path than normal for these disablility fixed through VR stories.

If your looking for something darker than normal, that will likely be full of tradegy(or at least harsh reality) than this is the story for you.

If your looking for the typical happy story of this genre than look elseware, for it might turn out well in the end but that's not a risk I can afford to take.

All in Vane
Overall

I like this story quite a bit, grammar, style and pacing are great. The story as an almost haunting vibe to it and the hints of a behind-the-scene-plot work well. The main flaw however is the lacking curiosity of the main character. She is understandably emotional about her situation but does nothing to investigate the strange helper AI, or any other clues. She never even checks her status or skills and asks zero questions about stats even though they are part of her quest rewards. It just seems very implausible at this point in the story. In a way, this turns the first 30 chapters into more of a fantasy story instead of litrpg. Still, it is a great fantasy story, just not exactly what I was looking for from the tags and synopsis.

Buller
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Going into this story, I was truly unable to know what I was supposed to expect. From the brief look at the summary of the story, I got to be informed of the fact that the main character would be blind. I initially thought this to be likened to other blind characters, like one of the side characters in The Dragon's Wrath Series. Here, it would include the daily life of the character, how she goes by with her blindness, and how that affects her when joining the game for the first time. Overall, these expectations were met pretty well. A large chunk of the start is focused on her early teens to adulthood, where we see a few moments of her foundations. Not going to say much about what exactly happened, but it was a good idea to create starting character flaws that would be needed to be overcome.

When it comes to the sensory style of the story, I do find it a bit lacking. This story is about a blind girl. From that, I would expect that this fact is put forth through a near-overuse of the other senses. For example, during a chess scene(I think it was chess) there could have been descriptions of how a piece felt. But, we were given little more than the outside perspective of the pieces being there, instead of any real detail. Normally, this would not be any real criticism since this style is used pretty commonly, but I personally felt like more descriptive scenes would have fit more with the blind aspect. An example of that would have been the initial time where she gets to see, and we get to see how that affects her. Still feel like that one was cut very short(though, the author states that he skipped that part due to inexperience with the craft, which is totally fine).

I have not read too far into the story. I know the initial backstory, I know the beginning of her journey inside, and I know the start of what will likely become a larger plot. From this, I may not be able to tell exactly how well the story is done. What I can say is that I enjoyed what I saw very much. Sure, there might have been a bit cliche of tragedy, but the original aspects make it all acceptable to read.

Grammar is something I don't feel the need to say much about. From my casual glances at the text, I found a single mistake. A missing " ... Not the most serious, and not something that should be taken as a reason not to read the story. Everything else was fine.

The characters in the story are pretty well-made. Sure, there are a lot of them, making it hard to remember them all at the start. And it's not like you really need to. It's the impressions that set out which amazes me. The father, as an example, clearly cares for his daughter. And the daughter, who is the main character, clearly loves her father, even if she does make a few empty threats of abandonment every now and then.

Overall, I give this story 5/5 with only mild criticism of the style.

Edge Valmond
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Alright, up until this point. I have come across some...terrible LitRpg's. Well, this is not the case. While the summary can use some work, the story telling of it goes much more and above. I had gone in blind without knowing this, until I specirically checked the genre.

Characters having some sort of disabilities having a chance in regaining utility inside of a game. Now, unlike those others. It has a proper conflict, a reasoning, a steady story. There is familial conflict as well. It has a good balance between nice and sadness, I guess you can say bittersweet. 

I haven't even noticed much, figured the game was more or less there as part of the story. However, it does actually hold a good purpose. It was nice how the exposition of it lead up towards the reasoning at hand. How each find a purpose again, it is endearing. Overall, I have to give it credit. Even the characters are immersive. You did quite well here. While I am not fond of this genre, I cannot give anymore credit than now. I have a bit more of a change on opinion of this genre. 

If there is one thing I do have to say about it, can try and concentrate the story a bit. Given how far I read, it is still not quite clear, but I will assume these points becomes clearer as it progresses. I am quite a patient person, so even a few more chapters from now will be fine in all actuality. 

Seerica
Overall

I've read until ch 16 when I decided that this is too good to be left without a review.

While reading the first chapter you might assume that the accident will lock the protagonist in a game, like many VRMMO works chose to do. But then, and in the following chapters, it showed that the authors has their own vision of the story that goes beyond a cookie cutter work of the same genre.

But, given that protag circumstances, the first story arc is dedicated to laying the foundation of protagonist and her interactions with others. It might seem quite slow to some.

On the other hand, that foundation connects you to her character, and improve the emotional highs and lows of future conflicts. Which is needed, given that VRMMO player characters usually can respawn.

Nameless32
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Ah, the "disabled person finds fully immersive VR and gets to experience X again/for the first time" trope. Truly widespread amongst sci-fi style litRPGs, and for good reason. Even by itself, it provides character, plot, and world development that gives stories a framework for what they become. Viewpoint-BLOOM... doesn't need it. 

What do I mean by this? Well, this story more than carries itself even without that premise. Just the descriptive prose and brilliant characters are enough to make you want to stay. You get to see the life of a blind girl, but it isn't told as some sort of sob story or tragic misfortune. It's just life, and Chitra's personality really leaks through here. Because while her disabilities are the crux of her problems, it is not centered around them.

Spoiler: Spoiler

Oh, and the grammar is near impeccable. I couldn't find a place to mention that in the body of this review so here's a tiny section for it.

Overall, if you're looking for a more character-driven litRPG that breaks the RR norm, maybe give this a read! I'd highly recommend it :)

Ravis
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Overview:
Viewpoint-Bloom is a story about a disabled blind girl who enters a VR game to experience sight for the first time. While it's not the first story to use this sort of trope. It does however do it extremely well with a wonderfully unique perspective.

Style:
The style is super smooth and flowing. It's very easy to get lost in the story. With a good introspective to detail ratio you don't ever feel bogged down reading it.

Grammar:
While I am not the best judge of Grammar, no mistakes really stand out in my mind. I think it's mostly due to the fact I just wanted to keep reading.

Story Score:
The story is absolutely wonderful. It doesn't move too fast or too slow. The pacing feels just right and you feel like your organically getting to know the characters and watch them move forward. The story doesn't rush into the action. Instead it focuses on the experience of the moment. Which for a blind girl seeing for the first time is absolutely perfect.

Characters:
 Chitra is definetly what makes the story. Reading her experience of being blind and living her life makes her feel like a friend we could all get along with. She has emotions, fears, and really good depth.
While the supporting cast hasn't gotten a lot of face time. They are equally as believeable and relatable. I am actually very excited to see more characters introduced and how they interact with Chitra.

In Closing:
Viewpoint-Bloom reads like it should be a best seller list to be honest. It's a wonderful story and a breath of fresh air to the genre. It hints at something bigger happening below the surface while still giving focus to the MC and her exploration not only into a new world. But being able to see, to have sight for the very first time.

Do yourself a favor and read it. I bet by chapter two you are hooked. I hope the author sticks with it and we get to go on adventures with Chitra for a long time.