Master Of All

by mangol

Original ONGOING Action Adventure Fantasy Male Lead School Life Secret Identity Slice of Life

Mark has been trapped in atraining facility for 5000 years. Training to master all the abilities so that he can get out of there.

After completing his training he finds himself in a new and different world where mages and monsters are a new concept. 

Can he blend into the new world? Hide his skills and knowledge to live a normal life?

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  • Pages :
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Author
mangol

mangol

Achievements
I Am Taking Off (V)
Word Wielder (II)
First Comment!
Group Leader (II)
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Varazzeno
  • Overall Score

Good, but needs work.

Reviewed at: Chapter 7

The Good:

 

Interesting setting, fantasy, and few grammar mistakes.

 

The Bad:

 

Author repeats himself, for instance "the civilian" is used about 5 times within two paragraphs. The dungeon we were initial introduced to is agained laid out almost exactly a few chapters later. 

Next is that it lacks emotion. The main character is completely separated from the world and at most is like, "damn... Oh well". Author please read into some psychology of being placed in a foreign/ enclosed environment without human contact for an extended period of time. 

 Perhaps, show the main character going through the five stages of grief.

 

The story has potential but needs a more human element if it is going to succeed.