E = Magic Squared

by PigLord42

Original ONGOING Action Adventure Fantasy Anti-Hero Lead High Fantasy Magic Male Lead Reincarnation Strategy Strong Lead
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity

A world filled with magic, quite generic in outward appearance has one underlying mechanic that makes it oh so very powerful for one man, or now thing.

Christopher Collins (Chris) is reincarnated into a fantasy world to regain memories of his former 19 years of life and discovers that the magic of his new world is the ability of raw energy manipulation.   

Follow Chris as he falls into an unfortunate series of events to become somthing more...or perhaps less. This will be a story of magic, blood and physics.

On advisement I have changed the synopsis, originally I tried to be vague and hide the plot twist/ change so here is a disclaimer.

⚠️  may have unexpected plot twists, the MC changes quite a bit in first 10 chapters ⚠️ 


The Basics: Spoiler

Magic: Yes

Smartphones: No

Martial Arts: Some

Monsters: Yes

Adventure: Yes

Basic Physics: Yes

Dialog Boxes: No (But does have an appraisal system)

Updates: 

I plan on updating 1 chapter per day maby more for the first week at least (Maybe 2 weeks ) then peddle it back to 4 chapters a week minimum with bonus chapters when I feel frisky(Im always frisky :D).

Author : 

This is my first attempt at a fiction on RR and hope you can be lenient with me about grammar and spellings. Please point them out and i'll try to fix them ASAP for your smooth reading pleasure.

Content: 

The MC will be powerful but not broken, he will win with intelligence and a deep understanding of how magic and physics works. I do not plan for Harems, or overly vertuouse MC. I will try to keep his personality as realistic as possible. NO “i will feed the world by growing potatoes shit”

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
  • Total Views :
  • 10,827
  • Average Views :
  • 570
  • Followers :
  • 96
  • Favorites :
  • 16
  • Ratings :
  • 27
  • Pages :
  • 82
Advertisement
Remove
Go to Table of Contents
Rate it
Fiction breaking rules? Report
Advertisement
Remove
Author
PigLord42

PigLord42

Achievements
10,000 Views
Fledgling Reviewer (II)
35 Comments
Word Count (IV)
Group Leader (V)
Advertisement
Remove

Leave a review

Reviews
Sort by:
WisdomKing
  • Overall Score

First of all, we're only 4 chapters in, but i believe they are few things i have to point out.

1- He is 82 gawd damn it !!

Question: Author, are sure you've grab the thought process of an 82 years old man? if not, please stop right there.

Now, this goes out to all the authors on this platform and out there.

You want to write a reincarnation novel? fine... but please don't bite more than you can chew.

What I mean is, if you are reincarnating a teenager, make him act like a teenager (and according to the background you gave him) , but... if you are reincarnating an adult (in this case an 82 years old man) make him behave like adult, gawd damn it !!! 

This might sound exaggerated to some of you but I consider an 82 years old person a sage, why? because they have seen and experience more sh*t in life than you can imagine, they know about life more than most people. long story short they are wise, very wise and so far your Mc behaves and has the thought process of teenager (the tide pod swallowing type).

2- The speech 😔

too much mom this, mom that.  

ok, here's my point if you are not getting it. 

Speech is something very important, it sometimes tells you how educated, how old or in what trade someone is into.

e.g: take a software developer, a psychiatrist and a bartender and have them have a conversation and you'll understand what i mean.

So understand my pain when our Mc an 82 years old dude (I'll keep bringing this up) finishes every sentence with mom, the pain is real.  

3- No worldbuilding

There's absolutely no description of wherever the hell the Mc is. All we know, is that tthere's a woman (mom 😁),  she might be black, white, short, tall. we don't know.

Long story short, there's no world building, I don't know when the author is planning on telling us more about where the Mc is, but hey, that might be a secret. so let's wait and see.

4-Story

So far nothing new, you know, some dude gets reincarnated in another world filled with magic and that's it. 

So, let's wait for more chapters. 

 

PS: I'm by no means trying to discourage the author, i just don't know how to write reviews, so i just say what's on my mind.

Peace😁

 

Copato
  • Overall Score

So this is just a warning I guess, if you came here for MC that struggles with problem I don't think you've come to the right place. 

 

I feel a bit lied to, or betrayed. The author said that the MC would not be overpowered and would overcome with smarts and stuff, and to be fair he does use his brain and knowledge of physics, but I feel like it's too easy.

Minor spoilers following

 

So the main character uses his magic to do some, what I feel to be rather ridiculous stunts for where he's at.

He doesn't even have A rank control of magic but he can split an atom. 

Also his major drawback is that he has very little magic capacity, and he fixes it in a rather normal way at first. He makes Crystal magic batteries essentially, and that's fine I like that but what I don't think is right is that he can so easily make stuff happen. I get that he has knowledge and knows precisely how physics work but still feel like it shouldn't be so easy to block what seems to be Pinnacle of magic, or at least a magic specially-made by a high tier wizard. I feel like it should have taken more to control the Adams but I can't know what is happening unless it's explained better. I don't know how to gauge his power because it's not really explained how stuff works, you don't get a comparison of power really, the only people we know of that have definitive stats get obliterated and we don't know how he really compares to others.

 

But back to the main problem, his only weakness is that he has low Mana capacity. This is fixed by him trying to make Mana by splitting the fat atoms in his stomach, which subsequently kills him and makes him an undead.

 

Up until this point we did not know that undead even existed.

 

TL DR

MC too overpowered and severe lack of world building. 

Isaac Olsen
  • Overall Score

I followed this fiction on the strength of its prolouge and blurb alone. If it continues to be this well writen the only critisim I have is that there isnt more to read.

Heart-burst
  • Overall Score

Got potential, didn't go where I thought it would, but better then I expected

Reviewed at: Chapter 11 : Planning

I love the MC and for the love of God, please keep explaining in detail the science stuff he make (but keep in mind physics got enought cool things in them, no need to bullshit about power of the dark matter, or some shit like that, because we have absolutely no clue to what the fuck it is and and if it even exist for all we know it probably is that our equation for gravity is flawed or missing parts, or we ignore the existence of a 5th fundamental force and it fuck up calculus on a big enough scale) with rail gun, singularity, black hole, wormhole(yeh, thuse are too convenient to forbid and they are theoricly possible), absolu zero, also ice can become multiple time stronger then diamond if formed in really high pressure and really low temperature,

most solids become more brittle then glass at very low temperature except stainless steel and to a lesser degree normal steel, 

If you need more cool stuff for your story you can MP me I'm a bit of a sciency knowledge guy and I am a 19 yo student in engineering, but not too much of a nerd (I hit harder then most) ,i speak french(main), english(good enought) and spanish(understand mostly), like really if you need idea I would love to help. 

DexyBentai
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Seems like a neat little story to me so far. Grammar is good, and so is the style. I really recommend writing longer chapters though, at least 1000 words. Don't worry if you can't write a chapter a day, it's best not to rush it. You have all the time in the world!

 

Anyway, I'm interested to see where this story will go. Nice job.