by Vowron Prime
- Traumatising content
Updates at 23:06 UTC every three days. Book one complete.
Magnus - or MC as he's infamously known - is the baddest mercenary of the 22nd century, specializing in the eradication of dangerous, high-value scum. So when a second-rate criminal organization in some backwater country captures his precious little sister and subjects her to the unnamable, there’s only one thing to do: mount a one-man rescue and murder every last one of them.
Though the extraction was a success, MC suddenly finds himself waking up to fantastical and hostile surroundings with nothing but his armor and a half-written note. Will he survive long enough to find a way back to safety? And can he do it before the timer on his life runs out?
- MC is stone-cold, strong(OP), and gets even stronger, but he'll still face his fair share of challenges, both internal and external.
- LitRPG-lite. No stats and an unconventional system. Expect abilities and progressions, but there will only ever be a handful of them.
- Science Fiction and Fantasy collide! (With a touch of mystery, Lovecraft, and body horror) There may or may not be romance in the future but there will never be more than one love interest if it does happen.
- Professionally painted art scenes!
- The focus for the first book will be on MC. This will also be the case going forward, but the cast of characters will open up in the later books. A few pov shifts early on, but they'll always be important for MC.
- Book one/120k words: DONE. Book two of the trilogy written, currently serializing. This series will not be dropped.
- Overall Score
- Style Score
- Story Score
- Grammar Score
- Character Score
- Total Views :
- Average Views :
- Followers :
- Favorites :
- Ratings :
- Pages :
Leave a review
The only thing I could markdown is style because, for some personal reason, I don't like it when authors use caps lock during dialogue. As in, "YOU SUCK!!!" instead of "You suck!"
That, however, in no way reduced the enjoyment of this story for me.
This author excels with creating an imaginative environment with unique characters! You can visualize each environment, character, and voice as if they were sitting next to you. This is something I envy.
Vowron knows how to tell a story, and it really shows within the first 15 chapters. I cannot wait to read on :D
No seriously, how did I not pay money for this? It’s more fun than is probably legal in some places.
The style: It’s cool, flows, packs a serious punch and gives the whole thing an awesome high-octane feeling. What more can you ask of style?
The characters: MC is a close literary cousin of Doomguy but more fleshed out as befits a novel protagonist. He proves his title as “baddest mercenary of the 22nd century” is earned early on and displays a level of thought and humanity that brings him above just about any other character of the type.
I was a bit worried he’d overshadow the other characters but, while he’s still the best, so far everyone else noteworthy has been a good character in their own right.
Grammar: I think I saw one or two miniscule errors, but didn’t stop to note them as I was too busy enjoying the story. So full marks.
The story: After MC’s high-octane intro in his own setting we get to see him thrust into fantasy land. So far this is setting up to be a pretty episodic journey with lots of action along the way and that’s just great because action is what I signed up for.
LordOfVoids has criticized some of MC’s tactical decisions on the early chapters, but this isn’t a hard, tactically detailed thriller anymore than Doom is the original Rainbow Six so I don’t think that’s a fair criticism. Actually, I’m not sure that’s a fair comparison as MC shows quite a bit of tactical acumen definitely more so than you usually see in this type of story.
In summary: Read it while it is free unless you just hate fun.
There is a great development on the character and his abilitys (he uses them well and is smart in how he does it). The story has a kind of fast pace at the beginning (because of the things happening at first so he kind of needs to do a "run for it") and as every story gets past the rush moments, he gets to develop more as a character and do big brain time stuff so shit don't go bad as easily as it could've been if he did not prepare for it. The grammar is great (not perfect because this isnt a published book but still A LOT better than 80-90% of the novels up here). Te MC and the people he interacts with has content (not just the paper cut out side characters without content you see out there). Well depicted scenarios and fights with enough details you can picture it all well enough (unless you got no creativity at all that even if he drew it all to you, you would not see it...). And overall, it's a lot enjoyable to see a smart MC that keeps his brain working to solve the shit that appears in his face and don't just do a "imma randomly change personality just 'cus of it" and do the opposit...
TL;DR: Amazing stuff. Great fighting scenes. Worth your time to read :)
Sooo as someone who cringes when little sisters get involved with stories often just skipping them to not get a japan incest spin off. I have to say I'm happy this story doesn't go down that route. Now don't get me wrong his sister plays a strong part in the story but more as a character background and no where near as a love interest.
That being said the story was recommended so gave it the old 5 chapter try and honestly 56 chapters in not a single complaint. The style is professional the story isn't holy it's pretty solid I'm not the best judge of Grammer but I didn't see any mistakes and character building is difficult. In this story you're given a basic template but instead of leaving it there the author builds on it beautifully which isn't seen enough on this site -_-. Any way the story is good and I recommend you recommend it
I'll preface my review by saying this is not what I normally read (at least not these days) and I started this as a part of a review swap... and then I kept reading... and reading... and I knew I read all those military sci-fi way back in the day for a reason. Long story short, Magnus is a blast (sometimes literally)
love it story flows nicely and it does a really good job of portraying the interesting world and the futuristic setup without getting exposition-heavy. My favourite feature of note is that the style and imagery make sense for MC (ex. "the sky looked like an ocean of freshly-ignited napalm"). And yes the MC's name is for all intents and purposes is MC... you get used to it.
Great! but don't take my word for it (my grammar is kind of shit...) look at all these other reviews saying it's great: zero(ish) stumbles guaranteed(ish)
I must say I'm interested, if not invested at this point, basically what we have is a really cool set up. MC somehow ended up in a strange new world while rescuing his sister, MC thinks this world is virtual, our only clue is at the capital; -> Capital here we go!
It's a promise of adventure plus something more (my hope is self-destruction, more on that later) but at this point, it is just a well-made promise that the writing makes me think will be delivered on with how fun the read has been up to this point. It's kind of slow but that's more a matter of personal preference. hence 4 stars.
This is probably where there can be the most improvement. Besides MC there aren't many other characters to get into if only due to screen time. One exception would be in the POV shift chapter staring a child and it does a pretty good job of getting the boy's character across in a short time.
I wouldn't go so far as to say side characters are one dimensional, it's just that none of them really stand out in the time given to them. They act in a manner that fits their role and not much else.
We do get to know MC very well especially with some interesting backstory bits that pop up further into the story. He's the stone-cold soldier type (obviously) and for some reason, I really want to see him suffer and I'm not sure why. Mainly I just think it would be interesting. What I think I'm saying is the MC's Character may turn you into a sadist (just for him)... maybe... I'll get back to you on that.
TLDR: Read it, it's good. I'll be reading it (even if only to see MC suffer)
This was a fun ride, the author put a lot of work into this story and it entertains.
There are a lot of revs talking about what I want to say so I'll refrain rephrasing too much on something other people have already written.
To me, this story got 2 prologues, one before he got to the fantasy world and after he got there. He thought he was trapped in a VR simulator. He also thought the people he met in the fantasy world weren't real (so far) but he still had enough heart to help them and solve their problems. Unfortunately, he got tangled to some kind of power struggle between the bigshot of a fantasy empire.
Poor guy, he just wanted to log out and see her sister ^^
The author's style of writing is a bit extravagant at the beginning but it does contribute to the tone of the story author wants to convey to the readers.
Excellent grammar, can't find anything to correct.
The story is a bit of slow for me but its still early. Like I said earlier, it appears to be two long prologues but the author kept us entertained with magnificent fight scenes.
So far, the indegenous people in that fantasy world are humanoid thinking amoebas. Wow
TL;DR: Looking forward to how a veteran HALO soldier solves his predicament in a fantasy world to go home.
"Mike, I've got a job for you."
"I'm listening MC... Hit me up."
Cromwell sighs as he musters up the courage to request something important from Lord Protector Mike.
"I need you to review this story, pronto, no delay. Hear me?"
"Magnus, you son of a bitch, I'm in!"
This novel is something else... It really is quite a unique experience. However, I do have to put in a disclaimer here. I've read up to chapter 21, so my review won't cover anything outside of those chapters.
What can I say? It's just amazing how Vowron manages to write in such a competent and interesting style. He's constantly switching around POVs by introducing side-chapters, and best of all, they don't feel like filler at all and are actually relevant to the plot. Now, I do have to warn Vowron since multiple POVs can cause confusion later on - try to limit it whilst keeping the POVs 'unique'. The combat itself is one of the things Vowron perfects in this story, it's smooth, gritty, and doesn't fuck around with you. Sweet mama, I've read a lot of military fiction and this one sure knows how to convey the feeling of supremacy in combat almost religiously - which is good!
The grammar is pretty much as refined as can be for a web novel. I may be a lil' harsh (I'm sorry Cromwell, don't kill me) but I've decided to opt out half a star out of my grammar score due to some very, very minor mistakes I found. I'd personally rate it 5/5 stars but I do have to remind Vow to check his grammar now and then. Vow, see this as a reminder and not punishment!
Again, the story feels very much alive and 'active'. It's business, plain and simple. You've got your OP MC blasting through Xeno scum and working his way out of this 'simulation' (I don't know if he actually resides within one but oh well). It has a progression system neatly tied within the story that doesn't feel foreign to the story; MC grinds, unlocks and upgrades new skills and repeats the process. However, I'm rating it 4.5, at least for now... The reason being that I've yet to see anyone that I resonate with as I did with MC. Sure, the amoeba girl is cute 'n all but I'm still waiting for the 'big' stuff to kick in and blast my wits out. Takes this rating with a grain of salt though, I'm just trying to find a reason not to mindlessly rate it 5 stars.
If you don't like Magnus, you're out. You're a dead man... Magnus is one of these 'no bullshit' characters that I always like to see in stories. He gets the job done, plain and simple. If you don't like a bomb of testosterone blasting through various kinds of monsters and otherwordly beings, then don't read this. I'm biased here, so that's why I'm warning y'all that this is a story for "REAL" men.
(Ok, that last part was a joke... Cough)
I like this, its very well done. This is a story of a proper competent main character that doesn't feel like a power fantasy. He has incredible power yes but the strict countdown timer makes it stressfull even though he can easily deal with most threats. His strength hits that place where it is usefull and good without making everything else in the story meaningless.
All said, great job!
One of the most aesthetically bazaar worlds I have ever read in my life. Extremely well written and with great passion one get engrossed in it like entering a slime. All in all I love this story and can't wait until more of it is released.
So, this is my review of Magnus. First of all, let me preface by saying I found it hard to put a review for a number of things that I will mention. But my verdict is that this is a great story, albeit a bit confusing at parts. I do see most of the issues ironed out eventually, however, there were a few that have irked me somewhat which I will discuss. I will put it as 5 starts however due to both my enjoyment and accounting for the good points of the story.
The style of the author is overall very good, it did at times confuse me however. Some fights were very unclear, while others were very fun to follow through. Overall, I would say that despite the style not always being "my type", it was still well done. In the instances that there are issues in the style, I will/have messaged the author after posting this review, and hopefully they will get sorted out!.
Generally, I like where the story is going. There are still a number of cases where I admittedly am not sure about some specific things, however I suspect for those cases it is intentional by the author and it doesn't take from the enjoyment. However, a small complaint I have is that the story at some point moves relatively slow. Mind you, the "novel" is NOT slow, but progress that I felt for the main plot did feel suffocated at some points.
Grammar throughout has been almost perfect. While reading I have only noticed a single grammar error, which to be honest is very impressive! No complaints here, 5 stars.
Generally, as of now, there aren't many characters that have been developed significantly enough. Some side characters were introduced, however, outside of one or two of them, the rest were more or less standard. That is understandable due to their unimportance, so there is more pressure on the MC (heh get it?) to shine as a character.
As for him, I do enjoy his character. At some point I did feel it weird or unnatural, but I suppose its a consequence of having no real "interaction" with many other characters. which meant that character growth was a bit limited. Even with this limitation, I couldn't deny that I have been cheering for the character nonetheless.
I suspect characters would improve significantly, as the last 3~ chapters have really pushed them forward comparatively.
I had been conflicted between 4.5 stars and 4 stars, however I felt it was a bit weaker as an aspect as of now, so I had to leave it at 4 stars.
This is a really nice story, I do recommend reading the first few chapters to see if it is for you. Fortunately, this is one of the stories that start strong. So go through the first few chapters and see if this action-fueled heavy-explosive style story is for you. Maybe it has minor points of imperfection, but when its time for explosions and actions, I don't think you will care about those points either.
I give this story 5 stars, I will be reading further as chapters release, and plan to eventually re-review this after some time.