by Vowron Prime
- Traumatising content
Updates at 23:06 UTC every three days. Book one complete.
Magnus - or MC as he's infamously known - is the baddest mercenary of the 22nd century, specializing in the eradication of dangerous, high-value scum. So when a second-rate criminal organization in some backwater country captures his precious little sister and subjects her to the unnamable, there’s only one thing to do: mount a one-man rescue and murder every last one of them.
Though the extraction was a success, MC suddenly finds himself waking up to fantastical and hostile surroundings with nothing but his armor and a half-written note. Will he survive long enough to find a way back to safety? And can he do it before the timer on his life runs out?
- MC is stone-cold, strong(OP), and gets even stronger, but he'll still face his fair share of challenges, both internal and external.
- LitRPG-lite. No stats and an unconventional system. Expect abilities and progressions, but there will only ever be a handful of them.
- Science Fiction and Fantasy collide! (With a touch of mystery, Lovecraft, and body horror) There may or may not be romance in the future but there will never be more than one love interest if it does happen.
- Professionally painted art scenes!
- The focus for the first book will be on MC. This will also be the case going forward, but the cast of characters will open up in the later books. A few pov shifts early on, but they'll always be important for MC.
- Book one/120k words: DONE. Book two of the trilogy written, currently serializing. This series will not be dropped.
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- Story Score
- Grammar Score
- Character Score
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This novel feels like an action movie slammed into a fantasy setting. You're not here for shakespeare, you're here to watch a badass blow shit up and in fun and exciting ways. The most important question for a book is 'is it fun' and for Magnus the answer is YES. I did this review as part of a swap (but traditionally I stop reading around 10-15 chapters once I get a feel for the story. This one I completed and you should too.
There are POV shifts but they build the story. I personally enjoy minor pov shifts but I know many people don't so I want to be up front about that. The writing feels a little clunky and technical/jargon heavy at first but once the story gets rolling it doesn't stop. The combat is fun, flows smoothly and it feels like I should be eating popcorn while I read it.
Didn't notice any mistakes. Doesn't mean there aren't any, but nothing jumped out to me.
There isn't much of one- Our main character, helpfully named MC, gets stuck in a fantasy world that may or may not be VR. Beyond that, he knows about as much as we the reader do. We are introduced to interesting lore in tidbits that is shown not told to us. Enough that you get some idea as to the sinister machinations going on, but not enough that you know what's happening. Right now the story feels like you're in a horror movie and the character is locked in a closet while something creaks outside. You don't know what it is, you just know it's gonna be nasty. In short, the story is leaning toward something interesting but isn't quite there yet (hence 4.5 stars).
This is the only weakness. The MC is a hardbitten cold warrior that only really cares about his family. He's taciturn and stoic. He's the Doom Guy/Master Chief. A little bit 'meh' if this were art lit, but do you really need him to be any more than that?
I have been reading Magnus for approximately three hours and change, and I've just finished Book One. It was a ride. It was an adventure. It was a delight.
If you don't read this review any further, I'd better start with my thesis: a few aspects of the story are a little rough, but it's ultimately top-tier work that we don't deserve to get for free.
The OP MC is a gruff treasure, an action hero who brings a dose of realism to the fantastic world around him. The LitRPG aspects of his powers are (relatively) subtle and delightfully morbid. Don't read the comments if you don't want a (concealed) spoiler about the amoebas, but know that the twist, though guessable, is great.
Every so often, casual languge distracts from the otherwise-seamless prose - an "f'ed up" here or a "badass" there. Even though it's usually a tie-in to MC's thoughts, they take out a sense of immersion. A badass doesn't need to call himself a badass to be badass. (Put more simply, I suppose it's a matter of show vs tell on occasion?)
A fine blend of sci-fi and fantasy that honestly reminds me of Warhammer fiction, from what little I've read!
I'd say more, but I've got Book Two to start.
Magnus is one hell of a ride.
A genre-fusion of sci-fi and fantasy, Magnus delivers thrills like those you'd find in a good action movie combined with intriguing takes on known fantasy elements. There's a Lovecraftian undertone here that adds a drip of dread to the bombastic fights and exploration of a new world.
We open with a major action scene that feels like the climax of a near future Arnold Schwarzenegger or Sylvester Stallone film, complete with explosions and devastation you'd expect. Shock and Awe.
From there, we are taken to an alien world which is not quite what it seems. We learn about it as the protagonist does.
The style of Magnus is practical, with enough description to get you into the story while keeping a brisk flow. Vowron doesn't flourish that much as he writes, but for a story about a practical tough as nails mercenary, that fits very well.
It really comes alive during action scenes. Vowron is a kinetic writer, which means that he does movement and impact quite well during a fight. These make the frequent combats a pleasure to read.
So far the story has been good, leaving enough questions to keep you going while providing pops of catharsis and answers to give you a sense of progression. It feels that we are very early in the story yet, but it's had a nice build up with good pacing.
The only issue is that sometimes events can feel disconnected. It's rare, but it can be jarring when it happens. It feels like they'll be events that make sense in hindsight and are really solid when reading the entire fiction cover to cover.
There is the odd grammar mistake that I found and the odd thing that was phrased to a bit unclearly. Yet Vowron likes to go back and fix things when they're pointed out, so grammar mistakes tend to disappear if someone comments on it.
This maybe the place where we'll see the most growth from Vowron. Magnus himself is well characterized but feels like he hasn't shown all he has to offer as of yet. The other characters are not developed completely as of yet. We don't spend a lot of time with the inhabitants of the world. Except for one delightful one.
Magnus is an action packed thriller with thought behind it. It's early days, but it's got me hooked.
If you like spectacle, body horror and a little mystery then I think this maybe for you.
This story is not for everyone. If you're turned off by a very edgy MC (he loses some edginess over time) or a very OP MC, then I dont recommend reading this. Furthermore, military scifi enthusiasts beware, the beginning is a little..... lacking.... for lack of a better word.
Come on, he blacks out? No military would risk a highly skilled special operator with a billion dollar machine that causes the operator to lose consciousness and therefore lose control for even a few seconds.
But the rest of the story seems to be building into something great!
Grammar is good.
I was a beta reader for this story and really enjoyed it! The protagonist is a badass dropped in a cool but totally unfamiliar setting. The story gets more and more gripping as it progresses and its a ton of fun to watch Magnus learn about his situation and apply his badassery to surviving. Highly recommend!
Vowron Prime is a very good writier and has a very good story to tell. The story that has been written so far is a combat junkies wet dream. The author is writing very well and is only confusing some of the times and listens when constructive input is given. The MC who's name is MC (ha!) is pretty darned cool, the world or sim (I haven't figured it out yet) is about as Alien as you can get. Spelling and grammar are very well done. I am looking forward to more of this.
:D CHEERS (c)
Blushing overprotective brother Magnus Cromwell finds himself whisked away on a whirlwind adventure to a whole new world! Disoriented, vulnerable, and with only a single mysterious love letter as a clue, our bachelor MC embarks on a journey filled with touching camaraderie, heartfelt laughs, and zany encounters with the amoeba people who call Hobogon Village home.
Will our plucky protagonist stumble into a bevy of busty beauties as he makes his way to the capital city of Kyron? Can our hero triumph over the sinister forces who threaten to throw the Sorath Empire into peril without resorting to violence means? As our newly-minted Contractor teeters on the cusp of mastering Relocator and Midar abilities, will Magnus tame his very own Dorbo-syken with the power of love and friendship? The answer to all of these questions—surprisingly—is no! Hell fukken no! Rrrrip and tear, Vowron! Rip and tear those guts!
I feel like the poetry is going to be a trend here, so there we go:
Lone wolf against the world.
Grumpy man against the flood.
With a gun all in blood.
Going strong as it should.
One Magnus Army for us to boot.
Moving forward through the mud.
Against the flow to kill the root.
Eleminating all to end the bud.
So let's focus on the story now. Honestly, I'm not a big fan of sci-fi and thought there are some elements from it, the story itself has a high-enough fantasy too. The combination of both makes it unique in its own way and made me keep reading it till now. I like the way in which this story is going. The start was action-heavy and the scenes later show great promise. If you want a lot of action and fun with some mystery to boot, that is the story for you!
The author starts with a unique writing style, which I wasn't used to, but I got used to it fast enough. And I have to say, it's wondefully executed. The flow is smooth and the poetry elements in it just makes it a lot more enjoyable.
No problems there. Even if there are, the author fixes them fast if someone points them out.
Going to fantasy/game world? I'm not sure which it is of the two, but that only makes it more interesting. There are many elements that give you only more questions, as the author introduces them one by one, but there are some asnwers as well. It's enough to make you keep reading through it.
Well, the emphasis here is on the main character, and why not? He is the OP MC, a bit cold and aloof, but that is no problem. Though, honestly I wish there to be a bit more work on the side characters as well. As of now, we don't see much in this regard, but that doesn't make the story worse in any way.
A promising story with a lot of elements to grab your attention. It's action packed with mystery in it that brings more color into the picture.
Overall Score: Typically I am not a big fan of gun based novels and prefer fantasy and cultivation type novels, so when my friend recommended it and I read the first few chapters I was not that into it. BUT when I continued reading, I quickly fell in love with the plot and the mystery. It is a unique novel that is a MUST READ for any fantasy or modern warfare lover!!!
Style Score: In the beginning, the writing was harder to read due to the technical military terms, but once you continue reading the writer starts to use more casual and relatable lingo. I, personally, loved the POV shifts and how things are related. The combat style is an exciting twist and the way the main character solves problems is very interesting. One thing to warn about is that if you don't read closly, you may miss some plot points.
Grammer Score: I found nothing with the grammer that bothered me or detracted from the story.
Story Score: The story is subtle and the reader is stuck in a mystery from the very beginning. As we read along, we will learn more about the plot. I personally loved the way the story is built.
Character: I love the characters and their personalities. The only thing I disliked was the fact that the Main Character Magnus was often referred to as MC. It detracted a little from the immersion.
Three, of a kind
I am a Marksman as I sit here bow-legged. From
my quivering mouth, these
bloody arrows shoot.
Don't you see?
That one is me!
Projectiles close inside, loosed with no power. They
dribble down my chin, vested
Who comes in pairs?
I am a blackened apple, corrupt to the core. Here
lies a gaping brigand doing account, one
marks four and a dash-line to fill.
How many, and where?
Death is gleaming teeth.
so I'm biased. this is the kind of story I'm constantly on the lookout for, but most often can't find.
the story is unapologetically brutal in a way that isn't angsty or overwrought.
MC's actions are practical and methodical, making perfect sense within the confines of a savage world and limited scope.
it's still early on in the chapters, but I can't wait to see what sort of trouble 'Opie Emcie' gets up to and in.
I'm just going to end things here since I'm pretty terrible at being constructive with my reviews.
Overall: love it!