Domenic is a sailor who just wants a life at sea. A brewing war between nations turn the already dangerous seas into something perilous. Domenic is forced into an untenable position, one he escapes with his life – though there is a greater cost he’ll have to pay after his deal with the devil.
Join Domenic as he explores the meaning and cost of both servitude and freedom!
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I was strolling for stories across the active ranking list and happened to scroll across this gem of a story. I added it to my read later to see if it was actually good or just inflated like many others with early 5star ratings. I let it stew for a couple days before giving it a crack and boy am I glad I did.
Style: Smooth read from a first person perspective, could maybe use a bit of working on visualization? That's probably being picky about it but if this story had one thing to work on that I can see it would be that. It does a good enough job painting the picture but a little bit more can really bring it to life
Story: Follow our lad Domenic across a thrilling journey on the open ocean. The author does a wonderful job juggling intrigue, action, world building and characterization so far. The system is also quite nice, its not bogged down with numbers that eventually don't mean anything or give tons of skills because of op MC reasons. Instead it's nice and thought out, and seems more in line with what an actual persons progression would be like if they were living in such a world. The handling of the ship is also done well. There's enough information for me to believe they're actually sailing on a ship but not so much information that the story gets bogged down by it.
Grammar: A couple typos here or there are the most I could find, and those are easy corrections.
Characters: Wonderful characters that feel real. The latest chapter has me feeling a bit tentative about a couple things but I'll put my trust in the author that we'll get an explanation later on.
Can't wait for this to hit trending so other people can enjoy this great read :)
This story is beyond words. Short as it may be, full of content it is. Riveting content at that.
Style: I'm not a great judge on this, but it wasn't hard to read and everything flowed more than well enough, which is a 5-star from me.
Story: Absolutely incredible and engaging word-to-word. I am very much so a skimmer just looking for the next trashy 500-chapter book to consume as I laze about. It's so rare to find a book with a story so good I think it's a crime to skim over even a single word. This is that. There's no grand overarching plot but everything matters just as much as if there were one. Simply beautiful.
Grammar: Generally good, though there are occasional errors such as missing words or using 's incorrectly. Not a big deal. Every author has this kind of stuff, hence the profession of proofreaders. Something to work on, not something to stress over.
Character: Oh god the characters. Why am I attached to every single character regardless of their screen time, whether plentiful or almost nonexistent? Teach me your ways. I could learn a lot from you to help improve my own writing skills.
Summary: This budding novel can be described very aptly with one word: Quality. Go read it. You can thank me later, it won't be a waste of your time.
The story is well enough written (grammatical and stylistic mistakes not common enough to annoy).
The start is very interesting and engaging in an action packed slice of life type of vibe, like the mc lives in medieval rpg world so his life can't be too peaceful.
Disappointing, it's a not a bad development per se but disappointing, it was such a great start about a talented sailor, we could've explored the world, the main character, watched him slowly develop, get to know people, advance in life and etc, instead we got another specul snowflake.
With a jarring and huge Deus Ex machina the mc is handed enormous powers and advancements, he worked hard for more than a decade for his achievements and then a couple action packed weeks make the results of his hard work from childhood pale in comparison.
The direction it set for the plot downgraded it into something much less, now the mc "has" to keep on getting stronger and stronger, jumping from action to action so that the plot won't grow stale.
I am explaining it badly but think DBZ, if for a moment the power levels stopped growing exponentially then it would have become uninteresting since it had nothing else going for it, since it was structured that way.
That's the trap the author has cornered himself into in my opinion.
Would be glad to discover that I was wrong but find it unlikely.
I don't know what to say, a realistc litrpg that uses it's system not as a plot device but something in the background, and does it well. I can only applaud you author; this may be one of my new favorites.
I love this story already only 10 chapters in. The litrpg aspect is well done with lots of room for growth but without the inevitable problem of power creep. The story and characters are fantastic so far. I hope this story continues as I am already addicted
I think an author has the right to write their story how they wish, but I think they made a mistake. Before chapter 14 I would say this would be one of the best stories on the site. Now? Well... Anyway. I liked the LitRPG aspect as it gave some flavor without overpowering the story. The characters were very well done and the conflict of the main character, Domenic, tring to find his way in the world was very relatable. I didn't like chapter 14 because Domenic's choice of his path forward in life was made for him. He didn't grow as a character or discover anything. He then proceeds to bum around a pirate town for at least the next 15 chapters which seems to go agaist the spirt of the Heart at Sea perk if not the letter. This seemed like an amazing story of exploration, discovery and growth, but I guess not.
I say, what a blast it was reading this. It has the most likeable main character I've seen in ages.
And the world it has been set in is equally interesting. You really can't ask for more.
The game stats feel slightly unnecessary, but bring enough to the table to justify their use.
Out of all of the story published so far, I only found myself skimming over the description of the world map. And I do that for all fics.
Also, I personally didn't like the deus ex machina moment where a god literally saved mc from death. But it was done well enough to not detract from my overall enjoyment.
So... basically, READ IT. I won't be surprised if it works it's way up to top 5 on Best Rated.
As of chapter 13, the only aspect I can't judge yet is the overarching plot. Everything else is quite good, and I don't mean "for a free webnovel".
The sentence to sentence level is solid. You wouldn't read for the sheer joy of phrasings like with some authors (Pratchett for example), but it does a good job of painting the scene and getting the action across.
Something similar goes for the characters. The POV is actually a stand out: Capable at at what he does and able to leverage that, but not all-powerful. Smart, but it's not pulled out of nowhere. A conscious, and not artificial (have you ever had a scene where a character was just too guilty or callous or something like that? The reaction didn't feel right? Well, that's not here). Something he really wants, but clear road to get it. All the stuff for a really solid character (and arc).
The other characters aren't quite as developed. To be fair, it's first person and they obviously have less screen time, but some authors can create a memorable character in a single paragraph. So I guess I'll praise with faint damnation: It's not as good as the best I've read.
As mentioned, I can't yet judge the overarching plot. There's been some quite interesting directions, but it's still too early to say.
The scene level plot is really good though. It's probably the authors strongest point. I'll say this: In 13 chapters there've been 3 really cool scenes. Most stories (even good ones) can manage maybe one in three times the length.
If you like a story where the protag gets through his troubles by quick thinking and observational skill, you'll proabably get at least some joy out of this.
Also since this is a sailing story: I've no idea how realistic it is, but it seems pretty solid, so unless you're a sailor it's probably good enough.
Finally: The GameLit aspect is more of a background element than central story focus, at least so far. The author does a good job of integrating it into the worldbuilding, and does a fairly good job of getting the important stuff across without blatant info dumps. Given the last chapter as of this review, things may happen soon on this front.
This story is as this review is titled, it's a story worth reading, whether you decide to continue or stop reading it is up to you but give this story a chance. As this story is still in it's beginner stages it, it's inadequacies can be looked over, but its journeying on the fine line of well written and completely capsizing. I can only hope the story can satisfy your boredom and improve as time goes on. :)
This is a good web fiction, it has good grammar and good flow and is one of the better fictions on the site. However, there are some glaring issues.
The character is made out to be idealistic. He isn't OP which is the main purpose of the story, which the author admits to. But there is very little personality to him. He is the carbon copy, intelligent, resourceful, courageous etc. found in every other story.
Storywise, it's an interesting take. Sailor? Cool. HOWEVER. Another glaring mistake is that there is no story. No end game. All good stories have a opening, middle, end, where the ending is outlined in the opening. e.g. the name of the wind, Eragon, mistborn, etc. If you're intending this to be a web series, spend more time building the world.
Another story error is that you jump around from place to place without building any characters or setting. There needs to be a purpose to each of these interactions. Mom, Hali, Vigram. Home, the windrunner, lawless jack's ship. All these fleeting interactions last for a chapter or two before disappearing. Yes we're interested in what happens to Domenic but that includes what's happening around him.
Style. I can't really comment on this other than what I've already said. You also smash paragraphs together when they could be split into a few.
Grammar. No complaints.