- Sexual Content
- Traumatising content
Lapis Lazuli Fardom, the current Demon Lord, is betrayed by her council when they establish a treaty with the Humans behind her back. Having framed many evil deeds against her, both the Humans and Demons set up an ambush to kill Lapis off. Moments before she is killed, a loyal vassal sacrifices her life to tear open a rift in space sending not only Lapis, but also the current Heroes summoned into the rift. When they are finally released, they realize they are suddenly in an entirely new world with races they'd never seen before at war. In this new world, what role will Lapis chose to take up and how will the release of an old Demon Lord into the new world affect the current balance of war?
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This is pretty good but... Its verbose, overly descriptive on literally everything whether its relevant or not, and some scenes are repeated from different POVs (the place where pacing goes to die).
Admittedly, I dont have the best patience or attention span so ymmv.
I read the first chapter on a whim. While drunk.
Then I came back the next day to binge read the rest while sober.
Now I'm tapping my foot as I wait for the next chapter to come out.
It's not without it's flaws, but it shows a lot of potential, and the author is clearly putting the time in to help it reach that point.
For every fault I've found, there is something else that makes that fault work properly.
Some of the dialogue can be kinda vague about who is talking, but the author is excelent with speech patterns, and you can usually tell by sentence stucture alone who it is that's speaking. Really. As a fellow RR author, I can't even begin to describe how dificult recognizable speech patterns are to maintain. They're fucking hard! And this guy does it well!
The POV switches around more than it needs to, but this review is being written only ten chapters in, and I can already tell that these random people are going to be built up into a solid supporting cast. There's like... three characters I care about so far, but I expect that number to increase as the story progresses.
Character development has been sparce, but again, this is only ten chapters in, and I can say that the character building has been solid. From the first chapter or two that a character shows up, you've got a good idea of who they are, their motivations, and what they may become. So far, the characer development has only scratched the surface, and I'm looking forward to seeing how everyone grows.
The plot is simple. Very simple. Instead of "OP hero failing to live the slow life" it's "OP demon lord failing to live the slow life with her slightly less OP hero potential boyfriend." That still sounds cliche, but it's handled well, and that's what's important. The plot itself is already layered enough that I can tell it won't fall into reliance on archtypes. It's nice to see an author that uses tropes as a tool rather than a checklist.
It's apropriately grimdark, and the author does not shy away from that. You've been warned! There is rape and violence but it never reaches the point of gratuitousness, and is used for a purpose. It's not gore porn, and I shouldn't have to point that out twice.
Did I mention that these chapters are really long? Because these chapters are pretty long. I frikkin love long chapters. It's great when I actually have to set aside some time to actually read something. 10k+ words per chapter! And they're not vomit on the keyboard! There's actual content here!
So yah, this review is being posted after only ten chapters. I'm grading a lot of it on asumption, but I expect my expectations to be outdone, and can't wait to see where it goes.
A story which is basically unreadable from the first chapter, but could be saved with heavy editing and (probably) a rewrite.
This has the potential to be decent. Right now, it's practically unreadable. We get random switching between past and present tense, combined with dialouge only slightly stronger than fan translated light novels, and lengthy, expository paragraphs. The first chapter gave me a headache, the style was so all over the place.
The characters felt one-dimensional and the setup so clichéd that it almost reads as satire.
The tone felt at odds with the content - a rushed introduction combined with what was clearly coded as a gore-covered tragedy combined with the rote world-building creates an off-putting style.
The prolouge is lengthy but the author clearly wants to get through the entire synopsis as soon as possible, which kills character development from the get go. Having just been introduced to these characters, I feel nothing for them, and nothing has been done to characterize anyone beyond a single personality trait, and most characters don't even get that.
This could be a perfectly fun satirical/comedic exploration of a plot which reads as the Frankenstein's monster of light novels, or it could be a violent and serious take on the same, but something has to give. Either embrace the clichés and have fun with it, or ditch the clichés, create something unique, and explore the darker and more tragic tones. No matter what, serious editing is required.
Calling this story verbose is a massive understatement, a more accurate description would be "literally nothing but exposition and run-on paragraphs".
This writing is just unbearable, I have trouble just finishing the first chapter even though I'm skimming 90 percent of the content.
But if you don't have as much of a problem with that as I do then the story does seem alright.
I'm liking this story, it seems very interesting, however development feels slow and the change in pov's don't help.
There are many povs that have no continuation, or feel meaningless, I'll continue following still
Good story, overall a worthwhile read. It could use a bit of streamlining though.
some of the early traumatising content was pretty offputting and the continous use of "kneaded" the mana are the basic issues i have with the story, otherwise its a great story with some cliche or classic parts but some interesting twists and turns keep it fresh enough for a good enjoyable read.