Crimson Crow: Thief of Fortune

Crimson Crow: Thief of Fortune

by Velara

Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Traumatising content

Breaking News: The multiverse's supply of luck has been stolen! A crack team of detectives are attempting to track down the culprit. But this is not their story.

This is the story of the Crimson Crow, who, after committing the audacious heist, fled to begin a new life on a distant world, Llyr. Beyond the reach of her pursuers, or so she hopes. 

Far from the comforts of civilization, she must rely on her quick wits and magic to survive and prosper. But she soon discovers that Llyr’s past is as dark and storied as her own. And that the past is inescapable.

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Diamond Vector by Vecteezy

This fiction is LGBT+ friendly.

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  • Total Views :
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  • Average Views :
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  • Followers :
  • 148
  • Favorites :
  • 27
  • Ratings :
  • 39
  • Pages :
  • 132
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Velara

Velara

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TheWitchOfTheRock
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

New world, new people, great story!

Reviewed at: Chapter 4: Knife Point

A gal trying to start a new life on a new world? Sigh me up!  We're thrown into the story ( And so is our protaganist)  and put into danger right away.   There's enough questions to make me keep reading in the beginning, and by the time the alien species comes in, I'm hooked. 

Of course, I'm always a sucker for NB aliens.

 

Style: My major rule of tumb for anything is "does this take me out of the story" and the style for the most part doesn't do this. There was a few parts in the first chapter where repition and awkward paragraph breaks threw me, but  it wasn't enough to fully shake me from the story and wasn't noticable afterwards. 

Story: It's a survival story to start. I like to review after the first three chapters of any story, so within the first few  I'm hooked,  and I have  Things I Hope to See in future chapters, meaning I care about the story, so  5/5. 

Grammar: A few minor things here and there, but good otherwise. Nothing to be concerned about. Editing your own work is tedious and very hard, so I'm happy with editing that simply lets me stay in the story. 

Character : Character will ALWAYS be what keeps  me in the story, and these characters are great! Cali has a distain for her coworkers that I already relate to, and courage that I  admire. I feel like I know  a lot about who she is already, without ACTUALLY knowing who she is. 

I'm also VERY interested in the  sentient species on this planet. They seem  fascinating, and I want to see more! 

I will continue to read this story. Please continue to write. 

DrBuller
Overall

I was reading this while listening to a random song that was about Cali on repeat. Safe to say that I had a full and deep experience while reading this story. But, on a more actual-review note, I would say that this is more than good enough to read. Style was engaging, answering questions as they began to form in my mind. Good stuff overall.

5/5

Csuite
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Unique, gripping and brilliant

Reviewed at: Chapter 16: Out of the Grove

The Crimson Crow: Thief of Fortune is one of the most underrated fictions I've seen on Royal Road, and it's such a shame it hasn't garnered more attention. It's been a while since I've been so hooked by a story that I feel like gently bopping the author on the head to ask them to update - I need more!

Our main character Cali is the mastermind behind some of the greatest heists in the multiverse, the infamous Crimson Crow. The story opens in the moments immediately following the greatest heist of her career, and possibly all time - the theft of all the luck in the multiverse. Fleeing to the isolated planet of Llyr, she soon realises starting a new life won't be as simple as she'd expected.

It's such a glorious premise, and the execution doesn't disappoint. Part high fantasy adventure, part sci-fi police procedural, it all comes together in a perfect blend. From the thrilling opening scene to the many subsequent mysteries and even the interludes, every second of Crimson Crow is gripping, fascinating and dripping with personality. Llyr is an explorer's dream, full of ancient ruins, hidden secrets and mysterious forces. We know almost as little about Cali and her past, but are peppered with hints that her history contains just as much fascinating depth to uncover. 

I love multiverse stories, and the world-building here is second-to-none. Llyr may be wild and isolated, but it's also vibrant and rich. Its societies are unique, rife with distorted legends, cultural depth and charming personalities. Elsewhere in the multiverse we're treated to highly sophisticated science fiction married with magical fantasy, and the intricate workings of high-level police drama. Details are fed out so naturally as part of the story's events, and you can tell so much thought has gone into every aspect. It's just brilliantly done.

I'm honestly amazed so many other reviews have mentioned the grammar needing work, because to my eyes it's professional quality, occasional typos aside. All it needs is one final proofread and it'd be ready to go to publication.

Cali is surprisingly relatable for a master thief. She's less a suave James Bond and more a practical girl next door using her skills to get the job done. It's a refreshing change from the stereotype and I love it. Richter and Olivia, the detectives on her trail, are also both marvellous characters (especially Richter, my god) who steal every scene they're in. The side characters are as rich, three-dimensional and stereotype-averse, which makes the world that much more believable and sympathetic.

In short, I'd recommend this one to anyone looking for a unique and refreshing read, and ready to be taken on a gripping adventure filled with discovery. I think it has all the hallmarks of a masterpiece waiting to happen, and can't wait for more.

Thedude3445
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Tragically underlooked so far

Reviewed at: Chapter 8: Blunders

Crimson Crow is a great story for many reasons, not least of which is because it starts in medias res, throwing us into a tiny, secluded corner of a fleshed-out, expansive world and giving us a fast-paced adventure right from the get-go.

So far the story is still in its very early stages, but with writing this good (the characters actually have personalities in their dialogue?!) you're bound to stick around. Chapters are infrquent as of this writing but I'm thinking this book might be worth waiting for.

Perhaps for the first time for story exclusive to Royal Road, I'm going to praise the prose for being well-done, descriptive, and giving nice personality to our POV protagonist. There's humor, tension, and woldbuilding all wrapped up in snappy lines and great vocabulary. Obviously there's some grammar mistakes and typos here and there--it IS web fiction--but the prose is actually good!

As of this writing, the story has just 1,400 views. Let us pray to the multiverse that this increases tenfold overnight.

RobertKeene
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

I'm current on all chapters (only up to eight released so far), but this story is an absolute delight. The characters are fun (including a very unique and intriguing race!) and the prose is solid. There are a few parts where some grammar is a bit off, but the author is investigating.

On to the details!

Style

I can always tell when an author has put time and effort into their style and prose, and this fic shines because of it. The opening paragraphs are art, and the rest of the work follows closely. 

Story

I am so invested in why the ancients are gone and what's happening with the magic and also the UMC... -coughs- I'm a big fan of unique fantasy with unique problems, and this is just fantastic, okay?

Grammar

As I mentioned above, some tiny issues, but the author is going to chase them down. Prose here is very tight, but if the author wants to go above and beyond, they could check for using the same word to start sentences multiple times in a row. It's an advanced thing that I really wouldn't mention usually, but the rest of the prose is so wonderful that I really don't have anything else to say!

Character

The characters are just spot on. Everyone seems to have a goal, motivation, and conflict that makes them believable, and you don't need to be hit over the head with it. I wish my own writing were this good!

Overall, please give this story a shot. And then join me in waiting patiently (or not) for another chapter! 

Kagan M Fallfield
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

This story starts off rather mysteriously, with the protaganist being seemingly dumped into a strange world that she knows nothing about. We soon learn that her name is Cali and that she is a legendary thief who just pulled off a massive heist for a substance called luck. Her heist was a success, but during her escape--intending to transport to a planet named Lyrr--she finds herself in a wild land uninhabitated by humans.

The prose of this story is great. Very well written and exquisitely detailed. The indigenious tribes of the world the story is set in is very unique with its own detailed culture. There are a few minor typos here and there, but that's really a non-factor imo because the attention to detail in everything from the setting to the magic to the characters more than makes up for it.

We also learn that Cali isn't the only character we follow, as we also follow a man named Richter, a renowned investigator who's deadset on bringing her to justice. Not a whole lot has been said about Richter's side yet, but I know that his story will be very interesting as well!

This is a very good story that I highly recommend. At only 11 chapters in, it's really only getting started. Give this one a chance! 

Laika
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Crouching Fantasci-fi, Hidden LitRPG

Reviewed at: Hiatus

Just as the Crimson Crow pulls off a luck-heist of epic proportions (my favorite type of magical manipulation!), this story makes off with your heart before you realize it. With an amazing mix of genres, a cast of enthralling characters, and a world that's as fleshed-out as can be, you're in for an exhilerating ride.


To be honest, the LitRPG elements feel a little out of place sometimes, but they're well-planned and I'm interested to see what happens as a result of their inclusion.

It's grammatically sound and structurally solid. Although we and Cali spend a lot of time with the natives of the world, the story feels like it has a clear direction, especially with the POV swap to the gritty, misogynistic detective I just know we're all going to love to hate.

This isn't your average story. Don't treat it that way.

Anjin
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

A Fun Theme but with Mature Writing

Reviewed at: Chapter 9: Investigation

Whilst reading this I'm reminded of Artemis Fowl, and the incredible journey I went on in that bizarre world. Velara has similarly created universe that is fun, enticing and, yet, still somehow approachable for everyone. It's a tough line to tread, but Velara does so very effectively.

The writing here is some of the best I have seen online, and, honestly, even rivals a lot of published fictions. Yes, grammar is on point, yes, the vocab is decent, but mainly I want to highlight just how beautifully this story flows. The writing is excellent, and excellent writing translates into excellent world building. 

The story is intriguing, and I really find the concept to be absolute genius. There's not a lot to say on that yet, but I think the theft of luck is one of the greatest ideas I have stumbled across in years.

The characters are good, but we're still in the early stages. My only gripe is that I don't always buy Cali's thought processes or motivations. It's a tricky situation, because we are given action from the get go, and, thus, the tradeoff is that we don't get to see our character in a 'normal' situation. Still, I sometimes worry that Cali is doing what needs to be done to advance the story, rathe than what Cali would do. 

To conclude, I dip my hat to Velara for writing a beautiful piece with some real intrigue and a great flow to it. It's one I can see myself binging a little later on! 

Tana Nari
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Disclaimer: this story's being reviewed early in its inception, so current status is no guarantee of future results.

We literally get dropped into the action as the MC falls from the sky and has to find shelter. Having stolen "luck" (because that's a transferable commodity in this setting thanks to magic), she's now on the run.

The grammar overall is solid, with an excellent grasp of spelling and punctuation. In fact, I didn't spot a single typo. In addition, the choice of language is excellent.

Style is less impressive. The writer could afford to go back and eliminate weasel words, adverbs, run-ons, and redundancies. They're not excessive, but they do hurt the flow of reading. Fortunately, the more recent chapters are much better written than the first few.

The characters are interesting, though there's few of them at the moment... the primitive culture has its own political structure and religion which seems quite fleshed out, if not yet well explored... and there's the promise of a culture clash in the near future.

Every event is clear, concise, and leaves no room for confusion or misinterpretation. And, in what seems to be a rarity these days, each chapter advances the plot in a meaningful way. More, it's not predictable (yet). It could go any of several interesting directions.

If you're interested in any of the premises I've mentioned, the story is well worth a read and only needs some editing (and more chapters of equivalent quality) to be one of the best available.

Fernicus
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

Disclosure: I reviewed this as a review swap.

I used to be a massive sci-fi fan, so this hits both my sci-fi and my fantasy enjoyment zones.

It's a good hybrid sci-fi adventure. Interesting characters and an imaginative setting. I love the sci-fi magic too :D

The critique.
The early chapters stumble in a couple of places. There are some akward statements and they feel fragmentory, they do not flow well from scene to scene. It feels almost like two versions of the chapters were mashed together in a rush.

However, it picks up again in later chapters where the writer gets more into the flow of the story.
I noticed few gramatical issues, there are some odd wording choices here and there, which gives the story an unpolished vibe.

Overall, worth the read with some inventive new ideas, good characters, interesting setting.