Forgotten Quest

by Deathless

Original ONGOING Fantasy GameLit LitRPG
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Profanity

litRPG | Publishes Weekdays, hopefully

Jason had lived an ordinary, if somewhat reclusive, life. His world was a safe one, full of video games and fantastical stories. For most of his life, those fantastical stories had stayed on the other side of a screen. Jason was content to keep them there.

On another Earth, humanity nears annihilation. The Scourge have pushed humanity back to their inner holdings, preparing to wipe them out. In a desperate bid for survival, humanity attempted to summon heroes from an alternate Earth across space and time.

Unfortunately, the summoning ritual goes terribly wrong. Jason finds himself summoned to their world—3000 years too late.

//This synopsis was created with help from the amazing Etzoli, please check out her work.\\

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
  • Total Views :
  • 51,552
  • Average Views :
  • 2,343
  • Followers :
  • 528
  • Favorites :
  • 85
  • Ratings :
  • 121
  • Pages :
  • 126
Advertisement
Remove
Go to Table of Contents
Rate it
Fiction breaking rules? Report
Advertisement
Remove
Author
Deathless

Deathless

Achievements
100 Comments
50,000 Views
500 Followers
Word Smith (VI)
Top List #2000
Good Review (III)
Fledgling Reviewer (I)
Advertisement
Remove

Leave a review

Reviews
Sort by:
nab
  • Overall Score

Slow and Irritatingly Uninformaive

Reviewed at: Chapter 19: Test User

This story has serious potential, but it also has some serious flaws.  The story thus far is very seriously deficient in answers to questions raised by its setup, especially the question of why the protagonist's game-style interface is in some ways broken.  The story is seriously lacking in interactions that could help the protagonist and hence readers understand the world he was summoned to.  Character interactions are shallow and give little feel for the characters the protagonist interacts with.  More generally, the story does a poor job of taking advantage of how written stories can provide deeper information about characters' thoguths and motivations than movies can.  There are times when it feels like important information is missing. Most notably there is an instance where the protagonist blacks out from magically overstraining himself during a battle and the story fails to address the question of what happened after he blacked out when he wakes up.  The story could benefit a lot if the writer would put more thought into questions of what readers can be expected to want and need to know.

Acerbic
  • Overall Score

Decent premise, but writing skill is amateurish. Characters show inconsistencies, make odd decisions, sometimes certains things relevant to the story would be used without prior introduction to the reader, like MC knowing things without us observing him being told about them, all the while those "off screen" hours aren't being indicated in the story.

Time management overall is fairly bad. Sometimes between two sentences only a minute is passed, sometimes few hours, making it impossible to feel for day cycle. Generally the text feels like an adaptation of a movie the writer watches in his head - without paying attention to translating it into textual medium - you can almost "see" jump cuts, camera POV switches, etc...

Aspartame
  • Overall Score

I enjoyed the primary learning to adapt to a new world part of the story. The MC's translating magic gimmick is nice too. After the second "oh noes, all the monsters I be killin are peoples" moment, I called it quits. Nothing about that concept has ever appealed to me.

tupster29
  • Overall Score

It's good, pretty classic litrpg transmigrant beginning, like how the magic system works so far. Looking forward to more chapters.

Diamondninja
  • Overall Score

Wow! Cool, interesting, and funny!

Reviewed at: Chapter 17: Party Wipe

I can't wait to see what this story has in store for us. As of charter 17 I'm hooked. It's got good working style, Grammer and punctuation. Interesting concept and great gimmick with an amusing translation based accent.

Besides overarching plot (so far) it has everything I could ask for. If it doesn't attain the last part I'll be happy with a slice of love though I think there is potential for so much more.