The Loyal Ones [Dark Biopunk Fantasy]

by diademata

Original ONGOING Drama Fantasy Psychological Tragedy Anti-Hero Lead Grimdark High Fantasy Low Fantasy Magic Male Lead Non-Human lead Strategy Supernatural Urban Fantasy War and Military
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Traumatising content

Thralls are a slave soldier race in an Earthlike universe, where biological magic takes the place of technology. Centuries ago, desperate humans volunteered themselves to be transformed as soldiers for the Poison War. Today their descendants are still soldiers and laborers. In contract law they are 'corporate wards'; slaves owned largely by arms dealers.

Dally Harper starts this story as a champion thrall fighter. He is one of the 'lucky' ones. It's all downhill from there.

 The Loyal Ones is a worldbuilding project with art, lore and writing.You can see more here.

Content Warning:

Explicit violence and gore, slavery, implied sexual assault.

None of these are framed as positive or glorified, however they do have a strong impact on the plot and main characters.

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  • Pages :
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Author
diademata

diademata

aka sixfoot_ant

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BobGuy
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Masterfully Written

Reviewed at: Ch 14: Art

The MC's reality is an ugly one full of injustice and oppression. He leads a miserable existence you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy. While this story might be a little depressing and gory for many, the author does an amazing job of telling it, I'm hoping he doesn't stop till he reaches its end.

The world building  is gradual and satisfyingly so. If you hate long boring info dumps then this is the story for you. The world itself also feels highly original compared to most of the cookie cutter templates you'll find on this site.  

The characters have distinct personalities that are beautifully fleshed out. I only wish the author would be a little more descriptive about exactly what they look like, however, that doesn't take much away from the story, and if I understand the authors writing style, they'll keep giving us breadcrumbs till we have the whole picture. The cover of the story and all the art in the wiki also goes a long way at scratching that particular itch though.

 The grammar is excellent most of the time and typos are quite rare. 

All in all, this has been a very satisfying read so far and I hope for more.

 
SavageMercy
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Engaging World with Lore Galore!

Reviewed at: Ch 18: Soldiers

Wow. If I wasn't addicted to the story in the first few paragraphs.

Let me say that Dally is a compelling character, whom I think everyone can relate to at least a little bit. Granted, we aren't lizards that can change forms at will, but his personality is so human that it instantly makes you wonder how these people are treated as they are.

Bringing out the dirty truth about humanity and the ways we sometimes fall to greed, "The Loyal Ones" is a fantastic tale that takes you on a rollercoaster ride from start to finish. The style is absolutely fantastic, and there's no doubt that the author has talent!

I noticed a few typos here and there, but nobody's immune to those, even after a proofread, so only a slight dock on the grammar here for that, because otherwise, it's flawless.

The story, without spoiling, is an emotional hook. And boy did I bite. I can't wait for more!

Character score goes without saying. There are so many unique personalities in this story and you can understand that within the first few sentences of a character's introduction.

If you want more information on the lore (and there's a lot to dive into), you can also visit the author's website for artwork and information! I highly recommend it!

A professional quality that should be in print in stores. We're lucky to have it here for free! "The Loyal Ones" is worth the read! Give it a shot!

CoCop
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Just a Dang Good Story

Reviewed at: Ch 9 : Fish

I never thought I'd read a story about the struggles of powerless and oppressed Kaiju, but it was really well done.  The world is ugly and unfair and the main character gets far from a fair shake.  The story is inventive, well done, fun, and worth reading.

 

Style
Pretty straight forward.  There's some action, but most of it is the main character doing his best to avoid a fresh round of injustice and torment, often times landing himself in more trouble simply by escaping the last round of problems.

Grammar
It's good!

Story Score
My 4 is a bit of a placeholder, I enjoyed the read a lot but I'm only 9 chapters in right now which is a bit light to comment on the story.  Not a lot has happened so far but I'm enjoying thins.

Character
The main character is well done and a treat to read.  I'd like to know a little more about all of the secondary characters (which is the half star ding) but again, it's all really well done.