by skalnor

Original ONGOING Adventure Fantasy Sci-fi High Fantasy Male Lead Portal Fantasy / Isekai Ruling Class Strong Lead
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content
  • Traumatising content

Eli is a man sentenced to death for the crime of surpassing the sacred number of 32.8, which is exactly the percentage of machine augmentations that people are allowed to make to their bodies. However it seems that death is not his end as his soul is dragged away into a fantasy world. As fate(?) seems to have ulterior plans for him he sets out to experience and change this world,as he will also be changed by it.

But this isn't a story about technology, magic, or bullshit exploits. It is a tale of failure. The failure of communication. The failure of systems, both magical and man made.The failure of logic and math in the chaotic mess that is life.

Authors warning: This novel is released strictly on a 'it's done when its done' basis. If it takes me a week to get the maid complaining to a farm hand or a teacher chewing out a student just right, then it will take a week.

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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Chapter 1: The Heretic ago
Chapter 2: Spirit Journey ago
Chapter 3: Assessing The Situation ago
Chapter 4: Self Image Problems ago
Chapter 5:Wealth Beyond Measure ago
Chapter 6:New Muscles and Old Mistakes ago
Chapter 7: The War ago
Chapter 8: Bunich ago
Chapter 9 :Orc Duties ago
Chapter 10: The Plans of Men ago
Chapter 10.5: The Plans of Men (2) ago
Chapter 11: On the Road Again ago
Chapter 12: Carriage Ride ago
Chapter 13: Start of A New Semester ago
Chapter 13.5 (2): The Start of A New Semester ago
Chapter 14: Introduction to Academia ago
Chapter 15: New Students ago
Chapter 15.5: New Students ago
Chapter 16: Cafeteria Gossip ago
Chapter 17: New Possibilities ago
Chapter 18: School Yard Politics ago
Chapter 19: Limitations ago
Chapter 20: Lecture ago
Chapter 21: Truths Sting ago
Chapter 22: Trials Preparation ago
Chapter 23: Trial Preparations (2) ago
Chapter 24: Trials Start ago
Chapter 25: Trials Start, (2) ago
Chapter 26: The Trials Start (3) ago
Chapter 27: The Trials Disruption ago
Chapter 28: The Trials End ago
Chapter 29: Preparation ago
Chapter 30: Evaluations ago
Chapter 31: Guild Work ago
Chapter 32: Elemental Match Ups ago
Chapter 33: The Importance of Titles ago
Chapter 34: Protective Measures ago
Chapter 35: Home Defense ago
Chapter 36: Fathers Prerogative ago
Chapter 37: Jealousy ago
Chapter 38: Capitulation ago
Chapter 39:Hidden Rooms ago
Chapter 40: Alternative Path ago
Chapter 41: Tricks Up A Bandits Sleeve ago
Chapter 42: The Invention ago
Chapter 43: Community Service ago
Chapter 44: Cleaning House ago
Chapter 45:Celebration ago
Chapter 46: Reflection ago
Chapter 47: Balance ago

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  • Overall Score
  1. Grammar is mostly good ,but I found the writing style confusing.
  • Overall Score

The summary is misleading because the story is told through multiple Points Of View (also known as POV) with the POV of the Main Character (MC) described in the summary only showing up for 2/3 to 1/2 of the time. The changes in POV are not clearly marked, the only time you get notified that there is a change in POV is when it is moved back to the Main character POV.

This leads to the phenomenon of head hopping  where the reader is disoriented and confused because of the rapid POV changes. Often times the POV changes are useless and weird like in the case of the POV change to a maid while also writing her a long backstory just so the readers can know who is going to clean the MC's house while he is in the Academy arc. This is also why many of the other reviewers say that reading this made them confused

If  you see a POV change while reading in this novel you should skip it because they really do not matter much to story and doing so will make your reading experience much better.

The MC himself really doesnt have a personality or a back story beside what is said in the summary. His thoughts and wants about his new life are not really shown or explained. The MC is a total mystery even after 300 pages of the novel.

Besides all of the flaws when the story is on the MC's POV it is pretty good and has the potential to be a good novel if the author would think about the reader before he changes the POV.  Evaluating if losing the immersion the reader feels is worth the POV is something to be considered heavily for every author who changes the POVs in a story. Each POV change is a jarring thing for the reader too many of them will make a novel unreadable.

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Great read but the MC needs adjustments

Reviewed at: Chapter 41: Tricks Up A Bandits Sleeve

Would be a 5 star review if the MC didn't act like a 14year-old angst riddled teenager when the author insists he is an adult.
Please fix the MC. Rethink who he is.Fix the starting chapters to turn him into a teen before moving to this world if needed. Otherwise some of his actions make no sense.

Everything else includding pacing, grammar, storyline and world-building are great.

  • Overall Score

The story is decent. Feels a bit rushed/confusing at times with seemingly random perspective/character switches. Overal a decent fiction with a good general idea of where it wants to go.

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I good start to a promising story. The world building is methodical and easy to understand, The main character is easy to project upon, and the pacing is just right.

The exploration of how magic can affect the advancement of a civilization and the priorities of it's citizens is very interesting as well.

Keep it up!

  • Overall Score

I haven't read muxh yet but it seems the grammer is good enough to get the point across, with little to few spelling mistakes. 7/10

If you the need to know more after reading the summary then go ahead and start, you won't be disappointed.

carlwash 1
  • Overall Score
Spoiler: Spoiler

 I like the direction this story is headed. It's fairly interesting and worth checking out. The first 3 chapters pretty much lays out what to expect from the style. 

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The writing style is smooth and grammer is better than some other authors
There is more than one character arc that I think I can see
The pacing is good, though some parts are still too fast or slow.

Flashbacks are a little unrefined
The magic system is shown without too much exposition
The world is a more complex than just two factions battling it out.
The world is somewhat original.
The characters are somewhat fleshed out but some parts are raw.
The main character is confusing - mood swings are jarring - maybe it is the author setting him up with a flaw, but he jumps from compassion to all other things and tolerance, then suddenly deep deep hate to bandits who have only attacked his camp once and haven't harmed anyone