Fan Fiction HIATUS Adventure Fantasy Female Lead High Fantasy Magic

When Leera gets a visit from a strange old man, who insists that she is an Iso-bender and that her dead brother has requested her presence at the capital, she leaves her mundane small-town life behind and sets out on a dangerous but fantastic journey.

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
  • Total Views :
  • 6,232
  • Average Views :
  • 249
  • Followers :
  • 20
  • Favorites :
  • 5
  • Ratings :
  • 8
  • Pages :
  • 85
Advertisement
Remove
Go to Table of Contents
Rate it
Fiction breaking rules? Report
Advertisement
Remove
Author
Lilwa Dexel

Lilwa Dexel

Achievements
Word Count (IV)
1st Anniversary
Fledgling Reviewer (I)
Good Review (I)
5,000 Views
Group Leader (II)
Advertisement
Remove

Leave a review

Reviews
Sort by:
Mecanimus
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Aang meets a fairy tale

Reviewed at: 14. Pure

Review up to chapter 14. I will not go on but I recognize that this is a good work and will write an advanced review.

We follow the story of Leera as she is taken from her quiet life as a jeweller, and is led to the capital by a strange old man named Quick. On their way, they visit several wondrous cities and meet a set of strange characters. A massive conflict between elemental nations a la Avatar is also foreshadowed.

Style score: fluid and pleasant, it carries to story forward. Nothing much to add.

Grammar score: perfect. Five stars.

Story score: this is my major issue and the reason why I drop the story. The narration is nice, really athmospheric but the pacing feels off to me. Characters and plot hooks are piled on chapter after chapter with no resolution and the main character is catapulted across the story without a chance to do anything. Many elements feel terribly rushed, which is a shame because they have potential. Om the other side the world is really vivid and I thoroughly enjoyed the descriptions.

Character score: everyone but the main characters have interesting facets. Leera does not really have a chance to be developed as things just happen to her without leaving her much chance to act.

All in all, this feels like a debut novel and while not without flaw, it is still a pleasant read. 


ZekromZZ
  • Overall Score

So far pretty dope story.

Reviewed at: 17. The Red Scorpion

While Iso-bender is a pretty cheesy name the rest of the story's pretty good.