Rise of Anubis - LitRPG Fantasy

by VoidedPhantom

Original ONGOING Action Adventure Fantasy Romance Anti-Hero Lead High Fantasy LitRPG Magic Male Lead Non-Human lead Reincarnation Ruling Class Strong Lead Supernatural
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content
  • Traumatising content

Rex Silverthorn was just one man...

Albeit a famous human-cyborg martial artist and merc. A soldier mercenary for the biggest power, United Merchants of the West, with business comes greed and more business. When the bombs dropped entire continents were remolded and the need for soldiers rose drastically. 

One of the most famous battles called "The Graveyard" in the future.. and Rex's final battle or so he thought.

"Space Fluctuation Detected"... "Time Distortion detected"... "Entity Detected"...

 

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
  • Total Views :
  • 49,108
  • Average Views :
  • 2,232
  • Followers :
  • 470
  • Favorites :
  • 134
  • Ratings :
  • 89
  • Pages :
  • 135
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Author
VoidedPhantom

VoidedPhantom

God of Death

Achievements
Great Commenter (IV)
Toplist #2000
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XoShadowoX
  • Overall Score

I won't say that it's terrible, but it ain't good.

The grammar isn't bad, and as far as I can see the author actually update's his story which is great.

Now onto the bad part. The first 7 chapters are info dumps. The main character is over powered through the wazoo, with little to no decernable great qualities despite the story reading like the author is straight up sucking on his wazoo. The MC gets everything on a silver platter with no amount of effort shown (some is told but that is worthless).

The worst part is that it's boring to read. The info dumps and the lack of emotions or character makes this dry stale wish fulfillment. I usually like wish fulfilment cause, I'm a sad bastard but this is simply unengaging and boring.

 

No insult to the author meant, this is an amatuer writers site after all, just criticism in hopes he can do better.

Aspartame
  • Overall Score

Chapter 1 was okay, nearly equal amounts of show and tell. See those chapter names? They look a little "tell only" to you? They are. Everything after chapter 1 is "background info the reader and MC shouldn't have." I kept reading, hoping for an actual chapter 2 after chapter 1. Gave up after "chapter" 6. It's like a water park made of info dump.

Khalaenas
  • Overall Score

This story hits me right at home personally, really like how it's going. It also is a lot longer than i thought because i checked the length just before writing the review and wow, 70 pages in 9 days is NUTS, not many authors on this site can claim that speed, but this guy did and i am thankful, especially because i like necromancers, (Which the author does too!) and such.

 

Just gotta say, keep going man i want to see more, and if you drop the story, i will find you, i will go to you, and i will get on my knees and beg you to continue. Adios, and keep writing good stuff.

P.S Grammar nice :P

 

Edit : Wow this review was written in a rush, so sorry for any mistakes during it's writing.

kingworld60
  • Overall Score

Good story line. Introducing the characters are very good and fun. Canโ€™ wait for more chapters.

 

๐Ÿ˜€

abovelife
  • Overall Score

Its okay. Syntax issues. authoer cant choose active or passive voice. Also other problems with grammar. Ok concept but not really any plot.