Twisted Branches

by jpuntuned

Original ONGOING Action Adventure Fantasy Psychological Female Lead GameLit High Fantasy Magic
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content
  • Traumatising content

The Old Gods won't sleep forever, and the Dread Beasts wish to reap the benefits of Yggdrasil and her children. Mankind relies on Aether Warriors and Mages to stand in the way.

Preparing to take the three trials of Magehood, Kat knows what she wants. If she can make it as a Sorceress, not only will she be able to venture into dangerous territories to procure rare materials for her father's once prosperous smithy, but also have the power to protect the ones she loves. However, life doesn't always go the way one hopes it will. There is more to the trial than her studies suggested. 

How will Kaitlyn Smythe make it in the world of blue bloods and affluent when all they see her as is a charity case?

How will she survive in the city of Ygg, when the nobles and drug traffickers are determined to bring it down before the Dread Beasts can get to it?

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
  • Total Views :
  • 22,193
  • Average Views :
  • 616
  • Followers :
  • 368
  • Favorites :
  • 69
  • Ratings :
  • 80
  • Pages :
  • 308
Advertisement
Remove
Go to Table of Contents
Rate it
Fiction breaking rules? Report
Advertisement
Remove
Author
jpuntuned

jpuntuned

Achievements
Great Commenter (V)
Good Reviewer (VI)
4th Anniversary
Author Premium Early Bird
Village Head (IV)
Word Smith (V)
I Am Ascending (VI)
Advertisement
Remove
Reviews

Leave a review

DanielPrince
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Jpuntuned seems to have the knack for creating fleshed out worlds, interesting yet flawed characters and a healthy combination of humour and emotion.

Style:

His prose is impeccable, well written and immediately compelling. Its gripping and leaves you hungry for more.

Grammar:

I've never noticed any issues myself - it's readily apparent that he takes great care to hone his work before posting a chapter (Something I should really start doing)

Story & Character:

I haven't read a Fantasy story with a female protagonist for a long while now, and despite being male (Which some believe means you can't write good female characters) he easily provides fleshed out and compelling individuals that you really care about in everything that he writes.

His story and worldbuilding are equally compelling, I've had some behind the scenes looks into his process in how he crafts his world and the amount of thought and time that goes into each decision, no matter how small, is phenomenal.

 

TL;DR

Read Twisted Branches. The story is great, Jpuntuned is great, everything is just great. Great.

Mahua Sengupta
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

This is a redo of my first review after reading all the new content and looking at the rough story plan that details the ending. The quality is still very high class, but the grammar needs some work. The story is complex and has several plot threads but none of them feel unnecessary.

The details are still mind blowing The world and characters are easy to picture and relatable I look forward to JP finishing the story. I want a signed copy.

The most important element of Twisted Branches is the consistency. I really like the strong female protagonist. I like even more she is named after my soon to be daughter-in-law. I understand why she is not like a man in a woman's body as is the case with women written by man authors. Kat is based on a real person!

Endemus
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

A Near-perfect Start

This review ported from the original with a couple edits.

Overview

I really, really like this story. Aside from the fact that it’s my favorite genre, it has a very strong introduction to the characters, which are colorful and interesting. I didn’t read before the re-write, so I don’t have much to go on yet, but everything has worked together to get me invested in what’s going on as well.

Style

The style is generally strong. Better than my own, I would say. It gives the right amount of description without detracting from scenes in which action is the driving force, and the dialogue is mostly very good as well, with only minor exceptions. In particular, the early nightmare sequence is very well done. It drew me in and made me want to get to the next part immediately.

The exceptions in dialogue that I mentioned are rare, but were jarring to me because of their rarity. There are two instances that come to mind, which I will list below.

Spoiler: Spoiler

 Grammar

The grammar is pretty good. It’s not spectacular, but it’s definitely improved since porting over to this rewritten and edited version. Because I’m a terrible person, I still find some of the mistakes and issues distracting, but I don’t think this will be the case for everyone. I also truly came to care about what happens next regardless of such issues as wrong words, misused commas (including splices), occasional issues with dialogue tags, etc. Again, the grammar has improved, and I’m very hard to please in this category, so I really commend JP for the improvements he’s made.

Story

The story is excellent. Perhaps I’m biased, since I spoke a bit with JP about his world building, but I think the world is fantastic, and it seems like we’ve only scratched the surface. There is a lot of complexity (or the illusion of it, which is equally as impressive and useful) that lends life to the magic and events so far. There are also clearly a plethora of different peoples and locations that JP has thought out. That kind of thing always impresses me as someone who has tried my hand at writing fantasy like this and exhausted myself trying to create everything I could ever need.

Character

I think the characters are the best part of this story. I know I’ve said that in previous reviews, but maybe I just have a tendency to read stories with really good characters. Kat, Sia, and Vince seem to be the most consistently recurring characters so far, and they all have great development. They have histories, they have wants, they have opinions--and they clash because of these things. Side characters like the registrar and her monkey are also great, and while I would hesitate to call Killian ‘great,’ he’s certainly a good character to provide a complicated relationship with our MC. All of the interactions between each of these characters further situate them in the specific niches that they fulfill, personality-wise. It’s really quite impressive.

Conclusion

I highly recommend anyone who likes this genre to read this story. It’s really good so far, and I think that there’s a good chance that it only gets better from here as the characters develop further and the plot reveals itself.

Seradi
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Well worth reading

When this story was first posted around half a year ago I loved it. A well designed system governing how schools of magic operated, fleshed out characterisation and set pieces, and a protagonist who wasn't falling into the typical tropes of being an elitist asshat or bumbling savant who just happens to discover that incredible function or ability nobody else uses that's actually the best thing ever.

I enjoyed it enough to keep it in my bookmarks even when it seemed to have died in the cradle due to jpuntuned having real life problems.

Now they're back, with reworked and streamlined schools of magic and changed PoVs that in my opinion make it more enjoyable and easier to understand where everything stands magically speaking.

The closest things I can personally think of that would be considered criticisms is that now and again there's the odd phrase or word that's written wrong, and some chapter breaks seem to take drastic leaps and you need to do some logical extrapolation to figure out how things got there.

Every time one of these pops up, jpuntuned has been openly communicative and receptive to re-working parts to ensure the story flows in an understandable fashion.

They've also been very open to explaining how things in the setting work to make sure you can follow along whats happening properly.

TL;DR: This story is solidly written high fantasy with good flow and enjoyable characters and worldbuilding. If you're a fan of magic fiction it's well worth giving a try.

Falbelo
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

10/10 would jump back into the Tear

Author Jpuntuned provides an extremely engaging story. The command of interactions and plot really get you invested in the story. With the rewrite he addresses the few issues I noticed and revamps the interactions between characters.

 

The interactions between all of the characters are all extremely realistic with the occasional twist that is entirely plausible. I appreciate the direction they are going to, and feel interested in the multifaceted nature of their lives.

 

The originality of the magic system based around the Familiars is also very interesting and I am looking forward to more on it. The self engraving of the MC also draws potential ways of strengthening magic which I am always in favor of.

 

While there are some easily addressed editing mistakes the overall flow is fantastic.

I have caught up on everything posted and looking forward to more from Kat and her Familiar!

Caitlin Gibson
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Awesome story by an awesome guy

The original Twisted Branhes was great, the new Twisted Branches is amazing.

The lack of secondary PoV forces the focus to stay on Kaitlyn alone and she's as badass as the woman she's based on. Fortunately, she's not the only character that's fleshed out. Vincent's character arc has been an interesting read and Saras is bloody intriguing. I'm glad the overarching plot is more visible this time around and am excited to see how JP executes its closing.

As always I love the author's style and have little issue with the grammar. 

Madiw
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

I like it when an author takes the time to build a world that isn't a clone of Lord of The Rings, Shannara or Eragon. JP has taken the time to write a detailed, original world and a detailed magic system. I haven't come across High Fantasy that deals with alternate dimensions/realms and the subject of familiars in such a unique manner. Hats off to the author. I'm glad the rewrite has caught up to the original, I look forward to where the story will go from here.

MrAzE
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

When is this getting published?

Is it good? Why do you ask? It is GOOD! It's really good and you should be reading it.

The story is really interesting and it is a really fresh take on magic and politics. The world is really well done, helping the reader immerse into it. It has a fresh feel to it that just begs for more chapters. 

The characters are very interesting and will surprise you with every chance they get. And to top it up, they act in a realistic way. They are selfish, they are greedy, they are true to what they are and that's what makes them great. 

The only problem I have with this fiction is with the style. It could really use some breaks between scenes because it can get confusing to follow what is happening with the plot. 

Overall, this is a really good read. Keep it up.

Techman
  • Overall Score

Payoff is worth the initial confusion

Very well written story in an original world. Has lots of potential for future stories.

My nitpick is that this story really should have the "Psychological" tag. Mind magic plays a prominent role in the story and the Old Gods mess with your sanity. This means that you won't always understand what the hell is going on. There are at least 4 different instances in the first twenty chapters that a seemingly abrupt time skip turns out to be a vision or nightmare or some other mind fuckery. That being said, the resolution of the first arc (Chapter 21) explains everything that has been happening, and in a really cool way. The payoff is definitely worth it, but it's a bit of a slog through horrible home life and mind fuckery to get there.

Honestly, everything up to this point in the story has been kind of an introductory story arc. Now that the MC has become a full mage, I look forward to where the story goes from here.

I recommend this story, just know that everything won't make sense at first.

Alex M
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Great start with engrossing characters

Four chapters have laid the groundwork of an interesting world with real, fleshed out characters. From a technical standpoint this novel is far and above most online serials. Dialogue is believable, descriptions are on point, and grammar is superb. The time and effort the author puts into each chapter is clear and absolutely deserves the five-star rating.

I already feel invested in the protagonist, Kat, and the author has done a great job in conveying her emotions. The magic is well thought out, with a great origin which I look forwards to reading more about and seeing how it ties in with the plot.

For anyone looking for developed characters, cool magic, and an interesting fantasy setting, this book is well worth your time.