Homicidal Aliens are Invading and All I Got is This Stat Menu

by JayAck

Original ONGOING Action Adventure Fantasy Sci-fi Female Lead LitRPG Magic Space Opera Super Heroes
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity

[UPDATES WEDNESDAYS]
(sometimes Saturdays)

Thousands of people around the globe randomly find themselves "hosts" for alien technology that allows them to alter their minds and bodies in an instant through holographic menu systems. With the touch of a button, any of the hosts can become super strong, gain magical abilities, purchase a giant robot, or become a master in any of an almost infinite number of skills that range from advanced combat techniques to fidget-spinning. However, the hosts also become targets for nightmarish, shape-shifting creatures that have come to Earth following the newfound extraterrestrial tech. The menu systems can grant their hosts great power, but it may not be enough to survive the horde of murderous beings hunting them down.

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JayAck

JayAck

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Dan Ngo
  • Overall Score

Good........ and bad.

* I’m amending my review, author was kind enough to take the criticism and roll with it. MC’s more consistent and less jarring, 👍🏿

Let me just start with: I like this story, sticking to it. Everything is well thought out and interesting. The only bad thing is the MC. She’s been over thoughtout, and yet never made it to where the author wanted her to be, I think. She’s introduced as a tough cookie who doesn’t take shit from strangers on the subway, or her own mother, moved out on her own and supports herself, and yet she throws up and passes out from shock and fear after being introduced to the system........ ummm wtf, you can’t have both sides, pick one, be more consistent. Either she’s an independent adaptable gamer, or a fearful timid maladaptive little mouse with no common sense, and yet here we have...... both, wrapped into a hot red headed olympian body. I understand why other reviewers are raging.

Filipzajac
  • Overall Score

At first i expected it to have some balancing issues but my expectations were off. 

With what the characters will have to possibly face, even mechas seem like not that much of an overkill.  

One other thing i liked is the fact that characters are quite reallike and very easy to identify with.

I hope for more 

  1. Spoiler: Spoiler

     

CheeseDreamer
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For those bored of the common tropes with the systems and all that, this is a breath of fresh air. 

The style is puurfect.

The story, well it's exactly what the description... Describes... But that's just the general plot, so even if the idea doesn't sound great, try it and you'll see what means, came looking for sand but found gold.

Grammar is also perfect, though there are some rare mistakes reminding you of autocorrect.

These characters are more alive than I am... Well, not happy kind of alive, just realistic.

Generally the story is very well written and any mistakes or shortcomings you find, if you tell the author, he'll fix it up better than a hydraulic with a 20cm least buttcrack does to a pipeline. If you didn't know, the skill of a hydraulic IS measured through how big his buttcrack is.

I hope you get how good of a story this is now.

LostAndContent
  • Overall Score

Love every bit of it and can't wait to see how the different users manage to diversify themselves. A great example of making the enimies tough enough to counter the balancing issues that come with giving the protagonist a boatload of available power.  

Srayan
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This one’s a keeper

So first off this story is a breath of freshness in this genre. I am still trying to figure out which genre but is maybe a cross between SF alien invasion and RPGlit light (stats mentioned and upgrade menu but doesn’t show the stat menu much).

Note the characters are quirky, including the MC, her sidekick and my favourite FELIX (personal stat menu assistant extraordinaire). although I have great hopes for the newly sentient pangolin. Yep a pangolin - so you can see author is not scared of the deep end.

the quirkiness has annoyed some reviewers which is unfair as the MC choices are fairly  rational and pretty good given she did not have a manual or beta rehearsal game before she gets dumped into the opening scene. 

So I am marking this one high. Even if it’s not for you I think it’s different enough to be well flagged.

kao
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Litrpg meets Independence Day. Maybe.

Overall. If there was an edit, it was well done. 

I liked it alot. Very entertaining story. Slightly different take on the alien invasion genre. 

So if you do like alien invasions and want to blend it with litrpg elements. Give this a read. It should prove entertaining for you as much as it did for me. 

Hopefully this will go far enough that I get answers to : 

1. Who really gave her the powers?

2. Are the invaders vs good aliens really on humanities side? 

3. Do ants really taste good? 

 

kjoatmon
  • Overall Score

This review, like the story, it under revision. There are a number of changes to address some of the points I brought up, so much of what was here before no longer applies.

For reference, the MC was complaining about specific things, given a way to change them, and ignoring it. Now, that is gone. Instead, there is a clear reason why they can't change the part that annoys them. Much better.

 That has kept me around to find the story to be developing nicely. There are reasons for the people to be the way they are. Not just the protagonist, but the ones she meets. It works.

Fyrefly
  • Overall Score

This is like crack for my brain. Amazing work, going in my top ten.

silentveteren
  • Overall Score

The title says it all. My review, and the story's title. Great premise, and well executed. Just sad I finished it all already. 

proofreader
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There are good things

I liked a lot of things here, and it was fun. I have to agree the MC is an idiot, and it was painful to watch her waste points so friviously. That said, it is also a little refreshing to not have a game-genius this time around. 

My biggest concern would be the menu and options. It is too complicated, and I think it will make the story damn difficult to write for you. I'd also encourage you to use less F**&*&s in your writing. Swearing, especially fuck after fuck really doesn't come off well in writing - it's boring and unimagnitive. At the very least, have your MC swear creatively/outrageously. Like "Potato Penises!" or.... such... but then you have to build this into their character, sometimes this works in comedy. 

Title:

It could use an updating when you have a more consistent theme. The more I think about your story the more I want to re-work it as a comedy, instead of the serious tone it has. 

She choose yoga as a superpower, amongst everything. Lots of funny material there. That said, keep going where you are going it is also good. If you get stuck, you can always write a super power satire.