New to Magic
by Ron Arnold
A science-fantasy story about a nine-year-old girl who doesn't quite fit in. She's too slow, too smart and too shy. She dreams of magic that she doesn't know exist. One day her life changes and she becomes an OP character. The story follows the young girl through her childhood until shs's a young adult.
P.S I'm not a great writer and I make lots of mistakes. But I love to make up stories and want to share some. Please forgive any mistake and any advice is welcome. Right now I have 400,000 words written but not edited. Any help with editing will be welcome. Most of all enjoy or find another story you will. Thank you. There is some gore and Traumatising content but not much of either
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I like the story in general, I'm really interested to find out how this is going to play out and if there is a greater story arc in the future.
I'm honestly not sure if the story will actually go anywhere or if it will just taper of cause the MC is too op. The plan right now was Magic academy, but the fact that she is already revolutionizing magic makes this story progression rather unlikely, so its wait and see for now.
Now the Grammar and writing skills... well how do I say it, it is definitely not so bad that it greatly impacts the reading experience, but its not good by any stretch of the imagination.
There are basically no typos but there is frequently a missing or wrong word, but the worst is the format.
The ", denoting spoken words are totally unreliable, they are placed about haphazardly and basically never come in pairs, only ever opening or closing the dialog.
The spacing is equally as bad, there are huge chunks of text and no space between scenes or actions, both in the text and in the story.
One sentence describes some inner monologue and then without any real indication the next sentence describes the real world again, its really jarring and together with the unreliable " makes for quite some effort to clue together the current situation. This is especially bad with the story her dad is telling, you basically can't differentiate between what the character is describing of the past and what the Author is describing of the present (both in third person)
With all that said, I still think the story is good and worth reading, I only hope that the author has some actual plans for the story going forward and it won't just suddenly end as it happens with so many stories having a strong MC
This story definitely deserve more than the current average rating. It's pretty good, well written and original.
It's about a 9 years old girl who lived with her parents on a certain planet with a lot of gravity. Then some allien arrive and she goes back with them with her parents. She is using magic casually but doesn't know that what she does is magic, so she thinks that it doesn't exist (even though she is the strongest in the universe).
MC is OP (magically, physically and learning speed) but I like it that way. She still has a few flaw especially her age (9 years old) which make her a bit immature, dense and ignorant.
However, what make me drop this novel is the pace. It's way too slow. I have read for at least 6-7 hours but not much happened. The author keep saying the same things again and again. The story became a bit of a slice of life where everything is detailed, like what she eats, when she goes to the shower, when she trains, etc.
Overall, it's not bad if you want an original story with OP female MC from the start and with a very slow pace.