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Daecrist

Daecrist

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Bence491
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A great idea, but the characters do not work

I really like the ideas both about the MC being a master of exploits and a corporate taking over a game world, but the MC and his friend in the game act like some 12 year old brats. It really hurts because I truly loved the begining of the story so I just could not leave without wenting my disappointment.
Gave it up after chap 24.

(I gave 5 for grammar because I did not remeber noticing any mistakes, but I did not look for them at all)

SPOILERS
These are just the few things that were too much for me:

MC wants immersion and does not check forums, OK I get that, but a corporate taking over THE groundbreaking game would be an unmistakable news in the gaming community. Also MC not keeping tabs on his nr. 1 enemy? really?

MC (and friend?) should be professional in exploiting games which means also in playing them. Why the hell do they act so f...king cocky, in noob gear when they can't even tell where they are, or even just how strong the pay-to-win boys are.

In their first confrontation they clearly encounter people who they have problem with and then they act like a**holes towards the person who saves them. WHY?! Did she do anything aginst them other then calling them what they are? They just started the game. They are worse than Jon Snow, they ARE noobs. She seams to know what is going on, they don't, why the attitude?

They meet and talk to the NPC goblin who acts like a real person, and then they see the most realistic town ever and still end up with the conclusion that NPCs are primitive and not woth speaking to? 

The goblin clearly said that the guys who attacked run the town so when MC and friend arrive they decide that they can do whatever they want? What kind of logic is that? They are told that it is an opressed territory and the a**hats from before rule the place.

Is this really how the master exploiters behave?
It just does not work for me, and it make me sad because the story clearly has a bunch of potential and the writing is good as well.

Anyway this is only my opinion if you where interested by the given summary just give it a try, and you can decide for yourself.

Faruel
  • Overall Score

started great with an intelligent MC before it devolved into stupidity. why would a master game-breaker who has by the stories account exploited multiple systems act like a first day of gaming noob? he enters the game and checks NOTHING! he does not bother to see what can harm him, how stats affect damage/hp/speed/reflexes or if he can dig/jump/climb and instead starts collecting flowers without even knowing their properties. yet I'm to believe he is used to deciphering systems to the point he can exploit them?

Author, I like the way you want to give personality to your characters and your basic world building but if you have set the case for the MC to be a game-breaking intelligent badass HE NEEDS TO ACT LIKE ONE.

qfarjad
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You can practically skip entire chapters and not miss a thing. Here's the prominent stuff after reading for 20 chapters. Shitty excuse for banter, cliche brain dead villains, "lotus online is so realistic omgomg", MC is so amazing and a quick thinker omgomg. Even the most obvious braindead scenes are explained after the fact excessively, glorifying the amazing MC for his amazing quick thinking skills. No grammar problems though.

emberwing
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Contrived, bland and boring.

The character motivations often don't make sense or are so blindingly stupid it's insulting.

The banter is bland, boring and adds nothing of value to the story resulting in entire chapters being pointless.

The few things it does get right are lost in the overall mediocracy.

Arcane_Pozhar
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Good series with a pacing and language issue.

Title brings up my key points.  This is a good series, the writting is well done, the setting is interesting, the characters have some depth.  However, the descriptions of various things feel like they get repeated a lot, sometimes awkwardly.  The cursing at points is a little over the top, it looses it's dramatic effect when it's used this much.  Also, I feel like at least a few of the plot twists are fairly obvious, and it's kind of sad the MC is wearing his idiot hat for some of this stuff.  With all that said, it's a fun series, I look forward to more.

KoboldPatrol
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interesting ideas but with significant flaws

(as of chapter 35)


Style: The story is told in first person style from the point of view of a teenager in a dismal part of town in a bleak world.

Story: The premise of the story is interesting; hyperrealistic VR games are a staple on RRL but the protagonist's campaign of revenge, his (planned) use of little exploits to get that revenge and the evil megacorp taking over is new. On the other hand, the development of the first chapters feels like taken directly from every story ever written ( Spoiler: Spoiler

 ). In accordance with the hyperrealistic game world the story takes place in there are many scenes where details are described but those scenes sometimes feel like they are there only to show that that detail IS there (Story floating along -> detailed scene detailing how much detail there is in all the details -> story continues to float along.)

Grammar: Very good.

Characters: Contradictory, immature (well, they're teenagers so it fits) and stupid. The protagonist and his best friend behave really stupid. It is said that they are very very experienced gamers but they show almost no professionalism while starting the game of the century for the very first time. Instead of keeping an eye on their surroundings, like they should after just making very powerful personal enemies, they trade paragraph after paragraph of useless circle-jerk banter. In general they have a very aggressive way of talking to each other; I'd say it's strange to hear that they are best friends but apparently that's indeed how teenagers talk with each other. By now I tend to skip part of the dialogue to protect my sanity. My other problems with inconsistencies and how the characters behave have been described excellently by Bence491 (currently the top rated review).

This review ended up sounding much more critical than I planned. I really like the idea of the story and the implementation is not bad but there are flaws that I just can't overlook that really reduce the quality of this work.

EddyB
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High quality Fantasy LitRPG

I look forward to each chapter more than any other story here (and I am following over 90), the quality f the writing is very high, the plot is good, it is aimed at the teen/pre-teen reading age, but as an older person I am enjoying it. The pace is a little slow but that just enahces the enjoymnet.

Betatester
  • Overall Score

At first glance this story shouldn’t work. A gamer seeking revenge against a corporation has been done to death. It reeks of other novels that have been going on for years. Yet, I find myself eagerly anticipating the next chapter and laughing along at the dialogue.

Once you get past a story line that seems played out you find characters that stand out. Villains that make you want to punch someone. And a storyteller that makes you look forward to the days adventure.

Lazy_Hedonist
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Good stuff, promising but to early to tell if its five stars worthy

azarth
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Picking up steam liking the direction.

Like the story more and more the further I've gotten. I'm up to chapter 45 now and it's picking up steam and moving in a really fun direction.