Fair Princess

by Macronomicon

Original HIATUS Action Adventure Fantasy Female Lead Magic Multiple Lead Characters Strong Lead
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity

Squirrel doesn't know her own name.

Found in the woods as a child, an orphan raised to become a talented tumbler, her past is a complete mystery. For years she's tried everything she could think of to figure out what her real name is and who she was before she was discovered stealing food from a travelling band of circus performers.

Twelve years after she was adopted, she sees an opportunity in a contest hosted by the king himself, a festival the likes of which no one has ever seen before. The best performing troupe in the land will receive a priceless gift: Any one question asked of the King's oracle.

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  • Pages :
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Quantum_Mechanic
  • Overall Score

Enjoying the story, seems to be moving a little fast but it's interesting. Writing is pretty decent without blatant offense given to the English language, just a few mispelled words and confused homonyms.

Here's hoping it carries out to a lengthy (at least 20 ch.) and satisfying conclusion.

Valryssian
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Style: 5/5. The story is well written and sufficiently descriptive, no complaints.

Grammar: 4.9/5. Occasional missed capitlisation of proper nouns, failure to properly mark POV changes loses .1 score but otherwise perfect,

Story: 5/5. It might be suggested that some of the story elements are 'cliche', but in the saturated fantasy genre, I rate plot by the scale of 'did I enjoy the story', and since I read this in one 'sitting', the answer is yes.

Character: 5/5. I'm not one to comment one whether characters are 'nuanced' or 'flat', but all the major characters are suffuciently unique and their motivations seem reasonable, and the two 'protagonists' are likeable.

Overal: 5/5. I liked it; good job.

wdc543
  • Overall Score

Awesome!!! Cool! Interesting!!! Intriguing!!!

Frederick Elliott Walker
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a nice quick read that is more than worth the time

this is a nice and short story. the charactors are not hollow shells only there to be face slaped, but semi flushed out people. the story is set and told in such a away as to be believable. the main charactors are not tring to be heros, awesome, or good people. they are just tring to survive a world turned upside down with no warning. the mc does not have thick noticable plot armor, she does survie but not idealy and she is constently hurt.

this story leaves lots of questions and has so many open directions for future writings.