Inexorable Chaos

(as of chapter 27)

In 'Inexorable Chaos', Quasi is a professional Hero that is summoned to any world where one is needed and thus he has lots of experience with that. His newest "job" is to destroy a world as it has turned out faulty.

Style: The story is told in present tense from the point of view of multiple people. Sometimes it's not easy to notice who's POV it is.

Story: While the concept of the story is interesting and the story is nice to read, I feel it is a bit lacking in suspense because Quasi succeeds too easily. There are also a bit too many different points of view.

Grammar: A significant number of plural-s/possesive-s errors and some homophone errors, in addition to punctuation errors. Also often there are clunky sentences.

Characters: There is not too much depth to the characters. For Quasi everything easily works out and the others don't have really narrow situations either. Most of the characters are "nice to know about" but none are overly captivating.

The author needs to take some friggin' notes, and then refer back to them while writing.

Is the skill called Bone Renewal or Skeletal Renewal? Are the lizard people Gejada, Gejan or Gajan? The head honcho of Odin's church, is he a Counselor or a Chancelor? Is Mule's name capitalized or not? Who knows! All those things change all the time, sometimes within the same chapter. Or what about that one time the MC decides his Advanced Mana Sense is going to be called Greater Mana Sense? Just the one time, then it goes back.

It is seriously driving me crazy.

This is a decent story with a semi original plot and likeable, if somewhat idiotic characters. The non-summoned characters might technically be people but they act like NPCs.

Now to the massive con: THE SYNTAX IS ATROCIOUS!!! Seriously, the most glaring error was instead of writing "Franky's" you wrote "Frankies". Unless you have many people called Franky you never write the plural of a name. 

What's slightly irritating is the sexual stuff in the story. I don't mind NSFW stuff but it's done terribly here. I don't know why you added it at all. It's jarring and annoying. If you have such raunchy characters, don't make fade to black sex scenes, it doesn't fit thematically.

The flashbacks should be made obvious. You should at the least make headers that say: 2 months earlier or something because it takes a few sentences to understand that we're somewhere completely different in the narrative.

And to my final criticism: It's laudable that you cleaned up your syntax somewhat in chapter 18 but you must edit the rest of your chapters. Take a day off from writing and edit properly. I guarantee you'll go up by a couple hundred in the rankings if you do. I almost stopped reading because it was so awful. 

Otherwise, well done and I hope to read more.

Current as of Ch 50:

First, this is not a humor novel. Those who read the first few chapters and expect it to continue in similar vein will be disappointed. Instead this is a high fantasy litRPG epic with comic relief. Some of the early chapters get dark real fast. So if you're looking for a fun, light hearted read then this is not for you. It is worth it if you like world-building, a large cast, OP MC, and multi-racial fantasy settings with mild political intrigue. Also one the MCs bones a lot, in many senses of the word.

The work as a whole isn't bad but it isn't for everyone. The author is a good writer and a bad author. The author knows what he has done so I don't feel the need to explain it but he should know that if he ever pulls another Dragkenoss I will fly to New Oreleans and hire a voodoo priestess to curse him with jock itch. Eternal. Jock. Itch.

The Good: Good characters, good premise, interesting world so far. I want to read more of it, that is a good thing. The OP MC is very well done! Excellent balance of awesomeness/OPness, style, and challenge. Quasi chapters are generally exciting despite knowing he'll win in some fashion and he doesn't win in stupid deus ex machina ways. He wins through strategy and plot armor. Plot armor the hero wears well, with fancy engraving so it looks nice when he goes into battle. The plot armor hasn't made the world balance seem wonky. Really well done.

If you like reading world history this is a great novel.

Grammar is good, just some typos and nothing that impedes comprehension of the sentences.

The best thing though, is the potential the novel has, it just hasn't been realized yet.

The Bad (hopefully these come off as constructive criticism and not a rant):

Style is rough and unbalanced. Too many chapters are thinly veiled world building and don't advance the plot. Long-winded/verbosity/circumlocutions at what I consider weird places and annoyingly terse when it comes to interesting things (the early chapters were more balanced). Chapters often have extensive character/world build-up and then very short action sequence. This presumably will get better as the cast stabilizes but I hope that every new character doesn't eat 2/3rds of a chapter just explaining their motivations and life story. Character background is not the same as character development. 

The characters are good but not great. You don't fall in love with them and never want the POV to switch, so far I don't want a spin-off book of anyone, except Quasi. The chracters are likable, have good backgrounds, not too tropey (yet) and... they don't seem to live up to their own hype. Many of them feel bland  because they don't get enough screentime to DO anything. We just have characters getting the world explained to them or the world explaining them to the reader. In 50+ chapters what how much has anyone other than Quasi done? Frank did like 3 things, Rathy moved, and Mr. Bear Puncher punched a bear (actually, I liked Mr. Bear Puncher. Very sad his chapter ended so abruptly.) World history is great, character life stories and flashbacks are often fan favorites but it feels like they're taking over the novel.

This novel is a plot tease. It shows us a great world, interesting premise, some good foundations of plot, and then has continuously put us off, like it is ashamed to be seen with the reader because it is banging our brother so it gives us monologues of exposition about their day so we don't ask for se... plot.

The Ugly: After chapter 30 or so I've been skipping parts of chapters. Up to 80% of some because they are giving completely irrelevant information about skills, characters, and settings that we will obviously never, ever, see again, are so foreshadowed so far ahead that the author will need to re-explain anyway when they become relevant, or could have been handled in 2 sentences instead of 6 paragraphs or a chapter. It reminds me of the Wheel of Time, in the middle books, where Nynaeve spent 2+ pages brushing her teeth. Not saying Jordan wasn't great but... Can you imagine reading WoT as a web novel?

I know I wrote a lot more about the bad things (or maybe different ways of saying the same things) but I do find the novel enjoyable. The bad parts stand out because the novel has some great strengths and obvious potential that I feel isn't being utilized. So keep up the good work and drop out of school so you can write more! I look forward to further adventures of Quasi Eludo.

In this review : one thing i like and one i dont

The secondary characters in this novel are great, (russian, big Lady, general... ) they have interesting personalities and story and it's fabulous. 

As of chapter 50-ish the main plot in the dungeon is really being stretched out, the characters is the only thing keeping me reading, the pace is way too slow/repetitive with Quasi. 

First off, this isn't the story of an experienced hero getting hired on a bunch of jobs and solving them quickly, it's one big tough job.

Overall it's a good story, well written, a good world, an interesting plot, fun characters. But while the overall ideas are good, they're not portrayed as well as they could be. 

Pros:

• Good descriptive writing
• Good grammar, with only a few errors that don't interfere with flow.
• The summoned heroes have great personalities.
• Most characters given any significant screen time are fairly well rounded.
• 3 fairly consistent main plotlines.
• MC is backed by the Gods of trickery, which always makes things interesting. 

Cons:

• Viewpoints switch constantly. By the current chapter (27) it's rare to get a whole chapter from one person's point of view, let alone two in a row. This makes it difficultto actually show any of the well crafted personalities.
• The MC hasn't actually used much trickery yet. He was unpredictable and chaotic in the first few chapters, but since then he has either facepunched or sent minions to solve all his problems with ease. 
• It doesn't seem likely that the 3 plotlines will converge any time in the first book's worth.

Overall, this is a great story with a whole bunch of good ideas, which is having trouble developing any one of them.

This story is fun but has some room to grow.  The author also has a bit too much of a preoccupation on the main character having sex with every species he encounters which is a little offputting beyond that though the story is fun and I would forward to see where he takes it.

I’m loving this story so far, it grew on me very quickly. At first I was wary as I was thinking it would turn into another OP MC story right away. Sure the MC is looking to become extremely powerful but it’s not like the normal OP MC where they can never be beat and can shoot laser beams that kill gods with ease or something. This MC survives by using knowledge litterally gained from countless lifetimes worth of personal experience and by being as quick witted as he is strong also with some occasional outright bluffs thrown in for good measure. I highly recommend this story. 

I love everything about this story. I'm completely up to date as of chapter 94, and I can't get enough of it. 

First, I love the main idea of the story. The main character, Quasi, is basically a professional mercenary for different Gods of the universe. I haven't seen this done before, and I feel the author has done a great job of putting this idea into writing. 

Second, I like the MC. Quasi is an eccentric and charasmatic MC, which isn't always done very well on this website from what I've seen. If I could imagine a person who's lived as long as Quasi, and was as accomplished as Quasi, this is how I would imagine them. How could you live this long through all of these summonings from Gods without having a good personality? The author has done a great job. 

Third, the writing. I haven't seen many errors in grammar, spelling, or had any issue understanding what the author was trying to portray. He does a great job with helping the reader visualize scenes with detail. 

Lastly, the story. As I've stated previously, I really like the main concept. It's unique and done excellently so. One issue with the story is some of the graphic/sexual scenes that are included with the story. It's just personal preference, but I'm not the biggest fan. Even with these scenes, the story is still excellent. The characters feel realistic, and the world is nice as well. My last issue with the story is how easy Quasi seems to be getting along in the story, despite being dropped into arguably the hardest scenario possible. I guess that's to be expected of a professional hero. Even though he may be having an easy time right now, I can see foreshadowing of hardship in the future.

Overall I'm giving this story 5 stars. It's a great story and I thank the author for his time and commitment to it. Can't wait to read more.

I almost dropped the story right at the start since the MC seemed just too OP to make a fun story, but boy am I glad i stuck around!