Hannah Forteza and her Forte Persona

by redron1028

Original HIATUS Action Adventure Mystery Psychological Female Lead Magic Male Lead Strategy
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore

Everyone has an alter ego, but none as terrible as on her.

Do you know who is Hannah Forteza?

She has a forte persona.

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  • Pages :
  • 98
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redron1028

redron1028

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Polaris Archon
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 The synopsis, well it was vague, for sure, but that mysteriousness made me take the first step into the story.

The Grammar is near perfect, only with some wrong choices of preposition which I'm also guilty of, but that can be much tolerated.

 

 

Characters. The first one seemed interesting enough, with the author really fleshing out their details since chapter 1.

The problem is with the style. The fleshing out of characters is okay to be a little lengthy, but what made it unreadable was that all the character's actions are too detailed, that you start to yawn through half of the narrative. It's so detailed that, even the degree of which the first character turned the key, was identified.

Sorry author-san I can only give you four stars, I hope you don't get discouraged by this. One piece of advice is don't over-describe actions. This novel will go a long way with a little tweak.