- Sexual Content
- Traumatising content
Previously called Standard Reincarnation Story
In a fraction of a moment, the Earth was no more. The planet was destroyed, and billions and billions of people were dead. And it was all an accident.
This is the story of Elm. A regular American born once on earth and given a chance to be reborn again on a planet with magic and monsters and dungeons. Except that for Elm, this is far from the idealistic reincarnation into a loving family -- the standard story of a child raised by loving parents who teach him the ways of the world,
Instead, Elm is born into a family of inquisitors. An order of nobility that is dedicated to hunting down and killing "Twice-Lived" -- the name society has for people like Elm who are reincarnated with all their memories of their past life intact.
This story is:
1) Extremely violent and graphic.
2) Still in a rough draft stage. I see what I am writing more like a synopsis than a fully fledged story. I periodically will go back to flesh out earlier chapters, build characters, etc... If you find the words "Show don't tell," comforting accept that unfortunately, I'm not at that stage of the writing process yet.
3) At one point this story was called "Standard Reincarnation Story," and I had written an extremely off-putting description of the story. This was mostly to keep out people who would just read the silly first few chapters then rage quit as soon as the violent stuff got started. Since I just had my first .5 star rating (without a page read count increase) that technique is not working, so I might as well treat this as a regular fiction and try to get regular readers.
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Overly winded and complex world building is introduced in snippets and at times lacks internal consistency, or worse, logic. The problems that the MC face are unique to him, have seemingly no effect on anyone else, and the rate at which they appear seem to be mostly just to push his troubles forward.
The style of the story can get a bit dull in description, but it can hold your attention to read the book. An overall positive.
The grammar is bad, the author admits it's bad, and you can only go over it and read. There's no helping it. At least it's readable English.
The Main Character is a husk of anything the author wants him to be. There's nothing apart from whimsical determination and whatever emotion is needed for the storyline. He also reminds me of Xianxia stories, a peerless talents that goes by unnoticed, somehow. The story logic tries to eek sense into it, but not overly convincing. The other characters seem fine, actually somewhat grounded in ability and measure.
The actual goal of the story is somewhat known, the MC is moving closer to it, but most of what happened between the start and the latest chapters don't want to align to it unless forcefully.
Overall, good story, decent storytelling, requires more polish. Not a litRPG.
It is an okay novel. It has quite an original spin to it.
What bugs me about this story is the punctuation, sloppy writing and the characters. Most of the punctuation problems are due to commas, which can change the whole meaning of a sentence, sometimes leaving you wondering what just happened until you read it over more carefully, which breaks immersion. The sloppy writing is probably due to rewrites where the author forgets to remove parts of the old sentence. The MC is overall pretty bland, and seems to have no real goals and this the same for most other characters. MC also learns seemingly everything quite easy but it is hard to say without a reference to the learning curve of another character.
If you have time to kill you can go for it. But if you're looking for a gem, keep looking.
The idea behind the story is great ... the execution rather boring. The parents seem to change from nice people when he was a baby to be only assholes at the drop of a head. It also changes a few times if his father thinks he has potential or if he hasn´t.
Most of his early training is descibed with: "Dude comes, dude teaches him this and this for that amount of time." and repeat.
Overall boring, but if the author does that possible rewrite I would suggest checking it out to see if he did the idea more justice.
Awesome character development skills. I gotta say I also like the super dark elements and the axe hanging over MC's head the entire time, while knowing that it will (Probably) be okay eventually... I sure hope he wore his plot armor...
Fav Charachter: 100% Big Willy!!!
The naming of characters is hard to get used to at first, but a very original idea.
Only a couple misspellings or additional words that don't need to be in there. Really well written.
I love this story. There are hints of comedy and silliness which I'm not sure really fit in such a dark tale, but it still works even then.
I wish my stories were half as good as this one.
The idea is pretty neat, the MC went through grueling training from when he was like ~4 years old to ~11 years old.
Everyone acts like it's completly normal, even tho his siblings never got training that was nearly as bad. Either every other character in the story is too scared of the MCs growth to tell him that he's abnormal, there's a conspiracy brewing or the common folk in that world are fucking overpowered.
The story POW is always from the MC, so we have to guess on the other characters motivation and reactions. I think that's pretty neat, but it leaves me very confulzzled by the odd treatment he's getting.
The story is original and unique. It turns the reincarnation archetype on its head.
There's gore and graphic violence, but while it has a lot more of it than most, it also oddly isn't as gratuitous as most gory/violent fictions are.
And it's paced in such a way that the violence isn't grating, nor there just to be edgy. It's used as an actual legitimate device to advance the story and develop the character. As result, you don't feel sort of fatigue from constant violence that you generally from grimdark stories when you try to binge read them. Because of this, I was able to read from the start to the most current chapter (17) in one sitting and was still urgently craving for more.There's mild comic relief interspersed and the story is just so damn interesting that even if you weren't a fan of gore, you might nevertheless be compelled to continue reading.
The author says he's not at the stage of writing where he can reliably "show rather than tell", but from what I can see, does a pretty good job of the showing.
The MC is sympathetic and well rounded. The supporting characters, are not featured anywhere near as prominently as the MC and his thoughs/observations. They thus don't have the opportunity to be developed, but are interwoven into the story in such a way as to make them compelling nonetheless.
The pacing is good. The level of detail and worldbuilding is perfect -- not too shallow or light on details, but not drowning you in verbose descriptions either. There is just enough suspense and mystery to keep you reading and wanting to find out more, without it being overdone or frustrating. His mastery of the english language is top notch, with very few errors in grammar, punctuation, and spelling for a self-published rough draft. His use of prose is creative and helps inject some of that subtle humor/comic relief I was talking about.
Overall, I highly recommend to anyone who can stand gore, even a little bit. For those who can't, then by all means, steer clear. Just know that you're missing out otherwise remarkable storytelling. Words don't do justice to how good this story is.
Finally! A story that hunts down reincarnated weeaboo introverted losers (that have no prospect whatsoever in their previous life whom are given a second thance they did not deserve to finally succeed in a fantasy like setting and all that bullshit) and finally bring them back to reality and give them what they deserve: back to obscurity.
Honestly this is probabely the best take on reincarnation that I have ever red. From the beginning you have an explanation why he is talented, And an Immediate sense of presure because he is twiced lived. With that you get welll thought out persons and an amazing world building. If you are not reading this start now you are in for a ride. This is a cut above the normal royalroad fictions, were a reincarated person is accepted, overpowerd and has all the girls falling for him. there are a few grammer mistakes but nothing really irritating. I would buy this book and I can be really stingy.