The Minotaur Paladin

by l nimbus

Original ONGOING Action Fantasy Sci-fi LitRPG Multiple Lead Characters Non-Human lead
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content

Garok, a Minotaur, is summoned to modern day Earth from another world...right into the middle of an apocalypse.

His purpose ? To be a Boss Monster.

But Garok is a [Cleric], and decides to the Pit with all that.

Giving whoever put him here a giant middle finger, he goes right back to doing what he does best, kicking Undead ass and helping people.

 

 Credits for the cover goes to Sazer, the author of Impulsive: Descendants of the Gifted. 

Slight edits on the cover done by Nefarious, author of The Pale Orphan

 

 This is a semi Parody of the game Exiled Kingdoms. Several concepts and monsters are drawn from there. if you like this story, i reccomend checking it out. it's free to play on Android and available for full purchase on PC. It's an Offline RPG that i've poured many hours into, and helped me partially when writing this story. 

 

Note: despite some heavy content early on. this story will NOT be Grimdark.

 

If you like this, help me by pointing out spelling mistakes and typos, as well as letting me know what you think in the comments.

If you REALLY like it, take a few moments and rate the story. 

 

 

  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score
  • Total Views :
  • 361,832
  • Average Views :
  • 6,701
  • Followers :
  • 1,178
  • Favorites :
  • 293
  • Ratings :
  • 345
  • Pages :
  • 336
Advertisement
Remove
Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Not A chapter. Read before starting TMP. ago
1. The Summoning ago
2. A New World. ago
3. A New World 2 ago
4. Consequence. ago
5. Calm Before the Storm ago
6. Dungeon Dive. ago
Interlude ago
7. Dungeon Dive 2 ago
8. Aftermath ago
9. Becoming Sparklee ago
10. Ill Mind ago
11. Skeleton Vs Cultivator ago
12. Ambush ago
13. Dungeon Dive: Retry 1st ago
14. Dungeon Dive: Retry 2nd ago
15. Dungeon Dive: Retry 3rd ago
16. Dungeon Dive: Retry 4th ago
17. Dungeon Dive: Retry Finis ago
17.5 The Update cometh. ago
18. A few days later ago
19. I got mad Skillz, Bro. ago
20. How to rob ( A blood bank ). ago
Looking for a Proofreader/Cleaner. ago
21. Fact and fiction ago
A slight delay ago
22. Some planning, some snoring. ago
23. Breakdown. ago
24. Life ain't fair. ( End of Book 1 ) ago
Announcement for those interested. ago
Downloadable copy of Book 1 available. ago
Quick Update. ago
B2-1. World of emptiness ago
B2-2: The Long Night ago
B2-3: The Long Night 2 ago
B2-4: To the Void ago
B2-5: The Dead God ago
B2-6. Death and decay. ago
B2-7: Into the wilderness. ago
B2-8: ?????? B2-8 ?????? @*!^#(%*^W!^@!)*&!*# ERROR. ago
FANART THREAD! ago
B2-8: Hilgytr ago
B2-9: Snakes in the grass. Literally. ago
TMP DISCORD! ago
B2-10: Wicalla ago
B2-11: Truth or Lie? ago
B2-12: Old secrets ago
Ova Here! ago
B2-13: Show me what you got. ago
B2-14: The Order of the Blade. ago
B2-15: On the road again. ago
I'm not good enough for this. ago
Update. Nothing too serious. ago
The big announcement. ago
Reviews

Leave a review

JayQue
  • Overall Score

I really want to love this

...but I find now I can.. I like the premise, and recently the writing has drastically improved, much easier to read and flows much better. Author is actively looking for an editor which should also improve the work further. Excited to see improvement!

 

Edited: 10/08

McQueenSerialFantasy
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

The Minotaur Paladin is a fantastic story, and by far one of the best examples of the game-based-adventure genre popularized on RRL. It's a great read and everyone should take a look and give it a chance to impress. It doesn't disappoint.

That's the short and sweet. Now, let's get down to the nitty-gritty.

From a stylistic perspective, The Minotaur Paladin artfully combines post-apocalyptic fantasy with the color palette of the game-based-adventure. The story begins with some broad exposition and then narrows its focus well onto the lives of the two main characters. The gaming elements are present without being obtrusive, allowing the story to come into its own while still satisfying the expectations of readers seeking the genre's signature technical flair. Character perspective is handled well, avoiding confusion, and the progression of the characters' abilities and relationships is realistic and feels natural.

As the story goes on, the gaming elements begin to take over a little more than some might find comfortable if they were looking for a traditional read, but in the end the tale is a game-based-adventure, and one could hardly expect the opposite.

The only genuine stylistic criticism worth pointing out is that time is spent developing anscillary elements and plotlines in areas far from the story and its characters. While these segments are well-written, they take away from the narrative in that they draw the reader's attention away from what counts: the developing friendship of the lead characters and the world they inhabit.

On the subject of the world: It's great. The post-apocalyptic scenario is beautifully presented. The game-based catastrophe that brought about the fall of civilization is neither banal nor over-the-top. The author shows the reader a realistic depictions of what might actually take place were such an event to occur, and the result is gripping. Although if truth be told, the world towards the beginning of the story (scrapping around for food and looting dungeons set in shopping malls) held attention far more tightly than its later incarnations after the "System" fully asserted itself. There was a certain desperate intimacy about the main characters' shared struggle in those early chapters, and as the characters became more established and more of the world felt "safe," those feelings slowly bled away.

Grammatically, there is little to criticize. There are a few errors here and there but nothing that can't be forgiven by the fact that not everybody has access to a dedicated staff of professional editors.

The brightest points in the narrative are the characters, and that's important. Great stories aren't just about what happens, they're about who they happen to. Garok and Clair feel like genuine individuals, each possessing their own thoughts, feelings, strengths, and faults, and their evolving friendship is filled to bursting with moments of humour, struggle, anger, relief, differences of opinion, and just enough playful colour to make one wonder if there's a romantic arc somewhere down the line...

Okay, okay, he's a minotaur and she's a human (mostly) but it's fantasy fiction, and stranger things have happened. If they were both the same species they would make a great pair intuitively, but oddly, the counter-intuitive chemistry between them (platonic as it may be for the present) feeds both power and balance into the engine that drives the story forward.

All in all, it's a wonderfull read. Take a look. Give it a few chapters to really get rolling, and you're sure to love it.

Sazer
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

... and this is the opinion I’ve formed of The Minotaur Paladin. Note that I’m not an experienced reviewer and the purpose of this review is to simply offer you, the author, encouragement and some room to grow and maybe an external perspective for potential readers – so take whatever I say with a grain of salt.

Story – It has an action-packed premise and I think fans of the genre would be happy with the amount it delivers consistently. It’s based off the game Exiled Kingdoms and mainly follows the journey of Garok through a post-apocalyptic Earth, so it may start off as a little confusing and difficult to keep up with for people who are unfamiliar with the game, but the story does have enough originality to be read as a standalone later.

Characters – The main characters, Garok and Clair, are interesting and well-developed with an enjoyable dynamic, but I feel the other characters introduced have not really left an impact on me so far and I wouldn’t call them memorable. Perhaps you could work on them a little more in up-coming chapters.

Grammar – The grammar and descriptions are on point. There are a few typos and punctuation mistakes in each chapter but the author is well-aware of them and works on fixing them regularly. I will probably modify the rating once it's more polished.

Style – The style of writing is unique and I quite like it. My only complaint would be that sometimes the pov switches too quickly, so it gets a bit hard to stay immersed. The dialogue could be improved a little, just in a way that would make it easier to distinguish who is speaking.

Overall, a story I have enjoyed so far and would recommend as well and props to the author for keeping me interested despite the fact that this isn’t my preferred genre. You’ve done well!

All the best for the future, L.

CrimsonEclipse18
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Shouldn’t this be The Minotaur Cleric?

Why Minotaur Paladin when the minotaur in question is a Cleric? It’s nothing big, just wondering. Anyway, moving on.

 

Grammar: There are plenty of typos in the novel, and not just the ones caused by a mobile. 

Story: It’s nothing new, and in fact, tries to incorporate these old ideas (cultivators, litrpg, other worlds, systems, etc.) and crams it all together in the novel. It works, somewhat, but it feels very, very bloated at times. Nothing special, but is better than most things here.

Style: I like the style of the story. The shifting perspectives can be a bit jarring at times, but it provides us with more information regarding the current events and gives us insight to new characters.

Character: This is the part that felt flat to me. Garok and Claire are fine, though I didn’t like how Claire’s backstory feels too forced and rushed, but the other characters are mostly unnecessary. The evil Cultivator guy who’s just showed up and start being evil, the goblin king who in a span of a month at most has created an underground kingdom and conveniently was transported with all of his servants, and the other human POVs that feels too unnatural and weird at times. I like the lonely Demin lich, voyeur Noble, and the pervy goblin who died too quickly, so there’s that.

 

Overall it’s just a rehashed plot and setting with a few nice twists here and there that could use better characters and character interaction. It’s nothing new, but it’s better than most.

Thomas Loud
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Crude, Funny, and Well-Written

The Minotaur Paladin is also action-packed by the way. Anyway to get onto the review.

Style: A unique writing style for sure and I honestly love it. The different ways in which the world is fleshed out make up a fair bit of the entertainment and comedy for the story and it's beautiful just how well it works.

Grammar: Few mistakes here and there, but nothing that ruins or really affects the overall experience in reading this story.

Story: The story of this Lit-Rpg is quite interesting with how the main focus is of Garok and Clair, yet we're constantly bouncing over to other events that are occurring while they do their whatever.  While the constant shifting of perspective is a bit hard to understand at first, adjusting to it becomes much easier as the story progress. With that said, these other events going on around the world as Gorak and Clair remain pretty street level with their adventures are all quite interesting and fun to read. This also serves to flesh out the world and what's going on pretty authentically. 

Characters: I honestly love all of the characters presented, they're all quite interesting and unique in what they're doing and it's wonderful. You have the aforementioned Clair and Gorak who have built up a pretty unique friendship so far in the story, the Goblin King (by far my favorite) who is quite an empathetic figure struggling with building his kingdom, and a lich who just wants some friends and hates rats. These are just a handful of several entertaining characters in The Minotaur Paladin, and how they all interact with the world and other characters is just perfect.

This is something I can't recommend enough, even with the few issues it does have.

Humanprototype
  • Overall Score

Too many POVs and too much erratic jumping between them. The result is the story feeling slow and very unfocused. It gets 3 stars because I found the setting and characters interesting, a much more focused narrative would have gotten it 4 stars.

Dude Meister
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

A project with potential that needs a brush up

The author might fare better writing a screenplay for television.

The POVs jump around too much and the errors are very obvious and all over the place.

It was still an interesting read, hence I haven't given it a lower rating.

Just4jest
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

An excellent story. Well worth the read.

Love the story and plot of this work. The Minotaur comes across as very controlled, collected and well spoken. Claire, the minotaur's companion balances well against this character with her more rough background and language.

I thought the world and system is well developed for this story and the plot was well paced and engaging. Stylistically I notice that the POV changes were commented on and have to agree that the many rapid changes in sequence were confusing and pulled my attention away from the overall flow of the story, but at the same time they advanced the overall plot and set up future storylines and built anticipation for upcoming plot points so I would count them as beneficial to the story.

Grammar wise, the story is well put together with only an occasional incorrect word choice. (Minor point of irritation, the author seems to like to use the word thrice rather than the phrase three times and I found that word choice irritating. This usage of the word seems to center around the Minotaur however who has a more proper/archaic stlye of speaking so it seems appropriate given the setting, however it did bother me.)

 The only real flaw I can really give to the story and it really is minor is the characterization. The two MC's seem to be presented as essentially the only good/properly rational people in a chaotic world. I do understand the need to outline how messed up the world currently is under the new system but would like to see a little more balance in the characters in the story. Again a minor point that may be corrected in the near future as it is still relatively early in the work.

Overall, I loved the work and would strongly recommend this to any readers out there.

starburst98
  • Overall Score

it is really hard to get into this becuase it jumps around to side character stories instantly, i know it may be important to the plot later but you really need to make us, the readers, care about the main character(s) before adding too many plot threads so we have a firm grasp on the primary plot thread that the side ones weave around.

jpuntuned
  • Overall Score
  • Style Score
  • Story Score
  • Grammar Score
  • Character Score

Fresh take on old tropes

I nimbus has approached a fairly common premise with a refreshing flair. His characters are well written and fleshed out

 Kudos for a strong female character, theyrth a rare breed in the genre.

What holds the story back early on is the grammar but I'm excusing that and not letting it effect the overall score since he is writing the story on his phone, which is an incredible feat on its own.