An A.I. meant for war wakes upon a ship with no power no crew and no memory of how he ended up trapped in the engineering shop of the ship. Now he must figure out how he is functioning without power why the ship is filled with water and who the 20 odd souls trapped in cryo are.
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Good storyline, good background.
The grammar could use a few tweaks here and there.
The style needs some work, especially the conversations.
All in all, a book with a lot of potential. I hope you keep posting.
I like the concept of the book, unfortunately your writing style could use a bit of work.
What you mainly lack is a sense of flow, especially from one chapter to the next. It just doesn't seem to come together as a story.
Your character interactIons could use a bit of work while your at it. It just seems kind of bland.
Don't get discouraged just keep improving as you continue the story, most writers do. Looking forward to more.
The grammar is terrible, many spelling mistakes and not enough distinction in styles between thoughts, robots and people speaking. This makes the sentence structure hard to read.
If you can read the poorly written sentences and abstract the meaning that the author is trying to convey, the story is actually pretty enjoyable, the sentences make me want to hit my head against the wall though
Needs heavy editing before it earns a 5 star. Good story with interesting developments. Flushed out characters with close to realistic behaviors. The only exception to this is the Mc that behaves more lika a human than an AI.
This is a really good story so far. I can't wait to see where the author takes it. These reviews need a few more score areas. Such as; World Building Score: 5 stars. Dialogue: 4 stars. Combat Scenes: 4.5 stars.
I like the idea and see great development chances.
I like the switches between the dungeon and the Crew, but I hope you write a bit more about the dungeon building processes.
I like the characters.
I really hope we get new chapters soon.
All in all, if the author keeps posting, the story has a lot of potential.
For the sake of my sanity, please scratch up on your grammar. I can barely understand what you've written in the later chapters.
The story is a refreshing story about a dungeon with some new concepts. The sci-fi part makes this really interessting. The only problem is the bad grammar, but the author is getting better. I'm looking forward to future chapters.
So i like the story a lot and the premise , grammer has some mistakes here and there but theres worse out there .The characters are intresting from the limited interations so far but other then the main ai they dont have a lot of depth but that can be chalked up to the story just begining. The conversations need some work they seem pretty chopy but BLUEWOLF's sums it up quit well.
Good concept for a story but it needs better sentence structure and for you to learn how long you need too make your paragraphs. Grammar could be improved but it not as important as the two points stated before. Also if this is going down the whole dungeon keeper route either keep the details vague or invest in something like Microsoft Exsel.