The duck had found her Core room.

Delta watched as the bird eyed her Core. There was a lot about this duck that had Delta a little worried. For one, it had almost zero reaction to Fran or Bacon other than more angry quacking. So now Delta had no clue what the duck was going to do.

Some ancient duck ritual to drain her of mana? Delta hoped not. She didn’t need for this duck to turn out to be some evil demon.

The duck quacked once.

Delta blinked at the menu.

Delta eyed the ‘yes’ button and at the waiting duck.

Quiss and Ruli hadn’t spoken about contracted monsters or what was okay to accept… but Quiss had summoned this duck himself, how bad could it be?

Delta frowned, the contracted monsters seemed like Godsends but there didn’t seem to be any downside to them as far as Delta could puzzle out, except for the expensive resurrection cost of course.

“Menu? What bad things could contracted monsters bring?"Delta asked aloud and the menu hummed into existence.

Costs a lot, doesn’t need to listen to her, and Delta can’t force it to leave until it get’s beaten by adventurers. Yeah, Delta could she how that could be a problem if she invited the wrong thing into her dungeon.

“Uh... sure, welcome to the dungeon,” Delta hit the button as she saw it. The duck glowed and changed.

Delta watched as its brownish feathers turned pitch black and it shook itself once.

“Quack!” The duck seemed... happier? Delta watched it waddled off as her menu dinged again.

That raised questions on its own. What curse? What exactly made up a ‘bad time’? Delta didn’t know and hoped no one was stupid enough to try. Still, now she had a duck, and she knew exactly where it was heading!

Not outside, sadly, Delta had a feeling this duck marched to the beat of his own drum.

The Pond seemed to fit the Dark Drake just fine and Delta quickly hollowed out a little edge near the back of the pond so the duck could nest there or something?

She wanted to improve the pond even more now but Delta inhaled and reminded herself she had an empty room before the Goblin Camp. Delta couldn’t just have empty space doing nothing.

Floating back, she eyed the space and remembered what Quiss had said off one hand.

“If they live beyond that door, its a bit weird they don’t guard this one.”

That was true and Delta felt giddy as she lowered the floor, but only about half the room. The forming slope felt off, so she flattened the side where people would enter. Delta looked up to the entrance that was somewhere about 8 feet off the ground.

“Can I lower the entrance?” she asked and her handy menu responded.

Delta hesitated then agreed. She stumbled as the dungeon shook. Her mental map not changing so much but her awareness felt like it had gain new depths as the first half of her dungeon lowered itself down to put everything beyond this room on a higher elevation.

The tunnel connection sank down until it was now on even ground with the lowest part of the room.

“Step one done,” Delta nodded and turned to the top of the hill where the exit awaited the people who entered.

“Menu, give me the mana cost for wooden goblin watchtowers!” Delta requested and she mentally winced as the cost.

Each tower did reach about 7 feet, which might explain the cost, and when adding to the hill elevation...

They were pretty good towers for her gobs, it wasn’t complicated and Delta could replace them in a pinch. Delta knew it wouldn’t take long for people to just rush up the hill and do battle there, so she also needed a method to slow down the advancing party.

Making sure her new friend Waddles the Dark Drake was fine, she hit yes in the menu to confirm the name was fine, Delta opened her menu and considered her options.

There was something she could purchase to help this room be somewhat challenging.

Delta hummed and then purchased it. More traps for the dungeon, more annoyance for the adventurers! The actual mana cost was only per trap, which was good because Delta was running a bit low at 18 mana.

Her menu buzzed and Delta eyed the trap purchase menu with surprise as a new trap appeared.

“Menu, you beautiful piece of fudge,” Delta grinned and the menu did a little jingle before fading.

Delta eyed the room and saw how she would place three sticky traps along the hill... and three slide traps above them... not too close.

Maybe a pitfall at the bottom if they managed to avoid the sticky trap? Yes! Delta could see how merely climbing the hill would be a problem for people and adding Hob or Gob with their new stone ammunition...

Delta felt evil at her non-lethal room. Well...Unless a rock took out someone’s eye then it would be somewhat dangerous but Delta could only do some much with her limitations. It wasn’t her fault if someone stared at the goblins throwing rocks or didn’t bother to wear helmets!

... There was no guilt at all.

Since she had no guilt about something that may happen... Delta quietly asked the menu about making eye patches as rewards for beating the room or something similar.


This had been a thing Delta had tried not to look too hard at when she finished the Boss room. It was an option she wasn't willing to consider until her first floor had some beef to it... Even then, the idea hadn’t been solid until Ruli and Quiss’ visit.

What would she do with a second floor? Delta, at the time, could only imagine more death and blood but now... thinking of all that space where she could challenge people, invite people to harvest nice materials or just relax in some safe room as they fished, napped, bet on chicken races or... something.

The problem was that as Delta came more competent at her menu ability the more things that she found she wanted to mess around with on the first floor that required DP.

Delta felt the familiar annoyance at time and resource management. Delta loved it but she was impatient. Back in the good ole days, she would cheat in money just so she could build. Then when trophies became a thing and achievements that dictated she needed to play fair...

Delta knuckled down and got to work. Another floor, even with the bare bones, offered more space for people to explore, more things for people to spend time on. Sure, she didn’t get DP from people just wandering about but if they dropped items or if they made tributes on top of her goblins collecting things then she would have ample time to collect things and build her DP.

What she needed now was... well, the one thing she was dreading. Adventurers.

Delta could be the innocent pure dungeon all she wanted but without some form of traffic, Delta was stuck eating mushrooms and rocks.

Until she got more Mana, she decided not to buy the traps for her ‘Fort Room’. Instead, Delta wanted to get something done to cement her opinion on this whole ‘Dungeon is a murder house’ thing.

So she moved to her entrance and stared at the two bare walls that only had torches flickering on them.

“Menu, I want to make a signpost and put it on the wall,” Delta requested and the menu appeared.

Delta felt like that was a bargain and purchased two. One for each one.

Delta smiled and hit yes. She only needed 10 or so.


For a time to come, all those who would enter the Durence Dungeon of Mushrooms and Pacifism would encounter these two signs. The quality and material would change over time but the words mostly remained the same.

To one’s left the board read as followed.

This was perhaps the most controversial thing a dungeon had ever allowed. A death was a gift to the dungeon. For one to allow such sweet power to slip away, their soul must truly be pure or hiding a dark dangerous agenda. People would discuss matter this for years.

The second board was shorter and below it had a simple box.

This was the dungeon’s answer to sparing life. To enter this dungeon, one may part with the fluff in one's pockets or the holy object of destiny. All was welcome. Those who stole from this box would be remembered. Often hunted down by the unofficial guardian.

Maybe the most famous thing about these signboards was despite how often one scoffed at them, the earnest tone never faded.

But first... before any of that became important. There was spiders.

There was lots of spiders.


Support "There is no Epic Loot here, Only Puns."

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