Andrew Seiple

Bonus Content 2-1: Old Friends, New Sheets

A note from Andrew Seiple

Evening, all. It's Christmastime, and I'm entertaining family. As such, updates might be a little delayed for the next few days. Please bear with me, and I'll do what I can when I can

Spoiler: Spoiler


Garon's probably the most practiced combatant of the group. He lived his life expecting to fight often and well, and trained in a variety of weapons before settling upon the axe. Now he's stuck with brawling, which... well, he'll get more practice with it, he's sure. Pretty much every part of his new plush body is a weapon, with some parts of it squishier weapons than others.
Garon was a pretty well-trained mercenary before he died, who used his skills often, at least the ones he COULD practice without causing problems. Now he's adjusting to life in a High Dragon's body... well, kinda. It's got some pretty amazing stats, at least in the High Dragon Hatchling's focus upon Strength, Willpower, and Perception, and average stats besides. (Except for dexterity, which thankfully his toy golem and mercenary levels and a lot of practice are helping with. To a point.)
High Dragons have two "skills" that are disadvantages. Limited Equipment means that he can't use most magical items that are meant to be worn, and No Thumbs means he has trouble handling things with his claws and doing fine manipulation in general, and makes it impossible to utilize most weapons.
Of the other four skills, Dragonseye is always on, and it lets him see in darkness and see magic auras around items and people with active spells and effects on them. It's also got some pretty good telescopic capability, but he'll need to grind up his perception to get the most out of it. Draconic Tongue lets him speak draconic, and activate his skills by roaring their names in draconic. Their names in that language are pretty much a lot of roars. Garon has two basic attacks... Chomp, which increases the damage of his bite for one, well, chomp, and Burninate, which is a moderately-good fire attack, that costs a bunch of moxie to invoke. It also has the problem of bringing intensely hot flames right in the middle of his mouth, which isn't a problem for normal high dragons, but... well, he's flammable. Very flammable.
Scaly Wings are the Last Skill, and they let the dragon fly. They cost stamina to use, but also require practice to use properly, which is why Garon didn't bust them out during the Ogre fight. The Flight skill is a thing, and he'd rather practice that someplace where he won't get him or his friends killed, thank you very much.
Fortunately, all else aside, Garon is a practiced mercenary. Mercenaries are soldiers of fortune, literally. Many of their weirder abilities use fortune, except for the ones that use stamina. Do the Job gives him bonuses while on quests, while Fight The Battles is a small, cheap party buff. Take the Hits buffs his defenses for a short time, and Blood is Gold sacrifices fortune and coins to heal himself instantly. Forced March is another party buff that increases his group's ground speed, Follow the Dotted line gives him a magical tracker that shows him how best to get to a goal, and Secure the Perimeter lets him determine the presence of living things within a certain radius, and their rough distance from him.
Get Paid is a weird one, and the only one he hasn't practiced much. It lets him curse someone who refuses to follow through on their end of a quest reward. It hits them right in the luck, and lasts until dispelled or payment is delivered. This is the only one he couldn't practice on his brothers, for obvious reasons.
Overall, Garon's happy with his change, even if the bulk of his generic skills are no longer useful. He's got great power and great potential, but he's already planning out some possible class combos to shore up his weaknesses and allow him to focus his strengths. He's not as much of a minmaxer as Madeline, but he has his moments, and having friends around to support and save is bringing out the serious side of him. He works best in a group, and though the siutation is weird, to say the least, he's pretty happy with his new party.
Spoiler: Spoiler


Madeline is making the best of a bad situation. Fortunately, she doesn't hold grudges, and why would she? Monsters never have happy endings, but for the minute, at least, she's got a lot of new options to play with that she never even considered before.
The problem she keeps running into is that it's been a long time since she's been this weak, and she lost a LOT of stats she'd gained from grinding with her new body. Toy Golems are weak overall, her vampire levels aren't up there yet, and her fire elementalist career doesn't play into her species strengths. It's all sanity based, and... well, she's not.
On the plus side, a whole lot of her old weaknesses are out the window now. She's pretty happy about that. Now if only she can find a way to feed that old familiar bloodthirst that keeps gnawing in her gut...
Vampires have one weakness, in the Light Allergies skill. But since she has no flesh to burn in daylight, and only suffers a minor debuff otherwise, it's no longer a big deal. On the downside, her Bloodsucker skill is only half as effective. Sure, it'll actually deal a bit of extra damage, but she can't drink the blood to heal. That's a problem. Greater Undead, much like Golem Body, lets her ignore a few things and shrug off other effects. The two were never meant to be combined, at all, and it's going to help her immensely, she reckons. Darkspawn is a familiar trait by now, no surprises there... Command is her ace in the hole. It lets her cloud a target's mind temporarily, bending their will to hers- to a point. Now if only her will was greater...
Fire Elementalists are fairly sturdy mage types. They're animators by dint of being able to call up elementals. And by elementals, I mean one elemental of each type they can summon. That's their limitation. Their key skill is Fire Affinity, which gives them 75% resistance to flames, and lets them breathe fire without boiling their lungs.
Call Fire produces flame, Destroy Fire extinguishes it (The better the skill the more put out,) Manipulate fire lets her pull, push, and throw it around with limited telekinesis, Endure Fire is a buff that gives whoever it's on minor resistance to fire... stacked with Fire Affinity it shields the elementalist completely. Others get benefits too, but not as much, obviously. Shape Fire lets her create walls and pictures with flames, and similar structures. Least Fire Elemental summons an Emberling, that mostly floats around and sprays fire at things.
Mana Focus is a booster that we've seen before on Threadbare. It buffs the elementalist's sanity pool by a percentage equal to their level.
All in all, Madeline's happy with what she's got. But what she hasn't realized yet is that being made out of wood, unlike her colleagues, has upsides and downsides. Her armor value is higher than her plushie pals, but she's not as resistant to bashing type damage, being more brittle. If that ogre had hit her during the fight, that would have been that.
Madeline is a min/maxer and natural munchkin, and is frustrated at not having the stats to back up all her awesome ideas. Still, she figures that if worst comes to worst she'll just die, and so long as there's a soulstone around she'll get a second chance. And hey, maybe Threadbare will be good enough at the Golem thing to make her an even more uber body!
She IS a little weirded out about being in a group that she's not in charge of. It's been a while since she wasn't calling the shots. This is taking some adjustment.
Spoiler: Spoiler


Zuula never planned for any of this. But it's all temporary. Sooner or later her job will be done, and then it's back to nature and the cycle.
Zuula was a master shaman before her death, and brings that to the table with fierce focus. Which is ironic, considering that her human trait allows experience-penalty-free multiclassing, but then she's been denying her human side for so long that she barely thinks about it anymore. In fact, "barely thinks" is a good summary, because she mostly runs on instinct until she comes up against something she can't orc at, then tries to figure out a cunning and brutal way to get around it, relying on wisdom and dirty tricks as much as possible.
Shamans are a weird class. Most of their stuff runs on sanity, but a lot of it is best used before the fight, and there's a ton of utility stuff in there.
The main combat spells she has right now are threefold. Beastly Skill Borrow, which she just got after the ogre fight, will let her temporarily borrow skills from animal spirits. She's VERY happy to see that back, as it opens up a lot of options... from silent flight, to bearlike sturdiness, to wolflike speed... there's pretty much an animal out there for every situation and she knows them all. Call Vines is a good hindering spell, entangling and wrapping foes. It allows decent battlefield control... at least against monsters that can't tear right through the vines. Slow Regeneration is the last, healing a target over time. It's a good one to toss on before fights, and best of all, it seems to work on golems. Unlike clerical healing. Which just goes to show that nature is way smarter than stupid wimpy gods.
The rest of her stuff is utility, and has mainly noncombat benefits. Dreamquest puts the target into a trance, and gives them blurry visions of the future. Kind of. Sometimes they're of the present, or things that never were. It's weird. Fated Preserver is a passive, it marks her as a guardian of nature to other guardians of nature, and boosts her fate. Poison Resistance is a great defense... which golem body pretty much renders moot. Secret Herbs and Spices lets her track down the plants she's looking for in the vicinity, and gives her the "Herbalism" skill without having to take the Herbalist Job. Speak with Nature lets her talk with natural animals, plants, and nature-related monsters. Of course, not all of them have much to say, but hey.
Zuula is also a practiced midwife, and relieved to see that as her levels rise again, the old skills are coming back as they were... no need to practice them all over again. Newborn's Mercy gives any infant she slaps it on a luck boost. Check Infant lets her look at baby's status screens... a thing that it hasn't occured to her to try on her new party members. Even though it totally WOULD work.
All in all, Zuula wants to regain her shamanly might and kick copious amounts of ass, while making sure her family is in a good spot before moving on. Although... she IS actually having fun with this new existence, more than she thought she would. And though she spent her first life shamaning and doing shamanly things, and leaving all else to other people, she knows that if more jobs open up, she might be tempted to branch out a bit. But to what?
Certainly not cleric or oracle. Gods be puny! And not cultist, because dark powers are stupid and have suckered orcs into doing their dirty work for way too long. But there's plenty of other stuff out there, and there IS that human skill she's been ignoring all her last life.
She will wait and see what comes. Yes, that is wise...

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Andrew Seiple


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Vampire 47 @Vampire 47 ago

Thanks for the update, even if it isn't a chapter...

wdc543 @wdc543 ago

If you need to take a break ,take a break burning out is a Bad Thing™. Just warn us you are going to take a break.

Munchodo @Munchodo ago

Thanks for the chapter and have a merry Christmas

Shance @Shance ago

I like the way you made this, with the personal coments thrown in every now and then.

and the fact that zuulas conclusion to what to do in the future about her classes is to wait and see, hence proving that she is following her instincts and not hinking, hilariouse.

Hapy holidays!

Moridain @Moridain ago

Feel bad for Garon. How much time must it have taken him to train up all those weapon skills, all for nothing...
I just realised from this though that Mercinary + Dragon means he is going to go the classic draconic way of hoarding as much gold and gems as he can. After all, get a big enough pile (and enough Fortune) and he is effectively immortal.

I get the feeling that Zuula's Midwife is going to get a lot of use. After all Toy Golems seem to start off with single digit luck. Can you imagine mass production without it? The entire continent holding them would explode.
As for future classes, I would love to see her go an unexpected route. Perhaps Duelist or Rogue? Something graceful and requiring thought and skill. It would be very anti-Orc, but that isn't necessarily a bad thing. She did the Orc thing last life after all. Why not try out the Human thing a little?

oblivious @oblivious ago

I was expecting Madeline to be older. I'm surprised that Garon's highest profession was Cook with those low skills. It's interesting that Toy Golem levels more slowly than Half-Orc. I thought it was an especially weak race, especially since Threadbare levels his racial classes so much faster than his adventuring classes.

    Moridain @Moridain ago

    I am the reverse, surprised she is that old.

    After all that means she was spawned in a dungeon, survived it, then managed to get a foothold outside (while feeding on people) without being taken out by adventurers, soldiers or clergy (for feeding on people).

      Andrew Seiple

      Andrew Seiple @Andrew Seiple ago

      She spent a lot of time in the wilds. Hell, she taught herself to be a stonemason the old fashioned way. (That whole no crafting job slot thing, for most of her existence.)

      Moridain @Moridain ago

      I assume Vamps need to feed the bloodlust occationally (which could now be a serious problem)? Did she do a Twilight and hunt monsters and animals?

      Also, I should have figured with Stonemason. I guess she made all those tombstones herself? Clever girl. :)

superkamimarvin @superkamimarvin ago

Her armor value is higher than her plushie pals,

And then litterly everyone on the page has higher armor.then her

    Varion @Varion ago

    I second this. At least needs to be lampshaded since her classes must not be boosting her armor enough to match up with her more frontal combatant type allies.

Arendeth @Arendeth ago

Thanks for the content Tongue.

Savane @Savane ago

Finally catched up!!

thanks for the chapters!!!

the story is great, love the humour and the puns.

One of the best of rrl

fowvor @fowvor ago

GREAT!... can we get a chapter now?