Kael Cor:A Vampire's Awakening
- Traumatising content
Kael wakes up in a prison cell, a newly turned vampire of the lowest ranks. A ravenant, he has no memories of who he was but was left to bask in the glory and bear the punishment of a life he doesn't remember. But in this world he finds himself Kael will have to strap up his boots if he should ever survive and escape the endless maze of dark tunnels where hundred of vampires and darkelves are slaves to humans, mining away for the whole of their immortal lives the magic metal oricahlum. But unknown to him a destiny and responsibility the likes of which has never been granted a vampire calls out to him from his bloodline, and from the eerie caves that served as his prison.
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Good premise and start, but as plot starting to gain complexity, contradictions and weird behavior is severely damaging my immersion.
I've read a few chapters of this, and can appreciate the work the author has put into developing a somewhat nuanced setting, populated with some fairly engaging characters. However, I am picky with what I read. If the grammar is subpar, or the author fails to properly spell check, I usually won't stick around long. I don't think I will for this. It kept me reading for a while, because, honestly, it is an engaging story, but it's mired with simple errors that can really only be attributed to lazyness or incompetence. Get a spell checker. Have a friend check your work. Use grammarly. Use a word processor that underlines misspellings (you're actually pretty good here, but a properly spelled word isn't necessary the right word). Don't use we're and were interchangibly. Read acclaimed novels to get a feel on how English can work if it's done well. All of these things can improve the quality of your content significantly. Please. I would love to read your story. It has potential. Gotta give it 2 stars, though.
Honestly, the story seems pretty interesting and I read the first few chapters. The author is good at describing scenes and the world around the character from what I've seen, and good vampire stories (cough, twilight) are hard to come by.
However, what really killed it for me was the grammar. While I can understand what the author is writing most of the time, the flawed grammar really kills the flow for me. I'm not that much of a nazi, a few mistakes I can ignore, but having an error every other sentence is a bit too much. It's a pretty easily fixed mistake as well, simply use grammarly or ask a friend to look over your work. I would definitely read this story if this was fixed though.
I have, over the past few months, furiously been looking for good vampire fictions. Fictions with a vampire as mc, but not with some kind of vampiric god as mc. And I think I have finally found one. This fiction, although it is new, is, if you ask me, the perfect kind of vamire story.
One with a MC who actually acts and thinks like an vampire. One with a storyline that actually makes sense.
If you haven't read this fiction yet, I can only say one thing:
READ IT YOU STUPID READER!!!!
This is a fun read with a lot of potential. If the relaeases were more regular I think this could really be something. As for content I like the mc and the world builing is happening at an adequte pace. I think that the culivation levels need a bit more explaining tho.