Trials of the Seven - Dawn of a new age

by mekogekk

Original HIATUS Action Adventure Tragedy Female Lead Grimdark LitRPG Magic Male Lead Multiple Lead Characters Reader interactive
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Gore
  • Profanity
  • Sexual Content

The world as we know it full of smart devices and high tech gadgets.

What would you do if suddenally the devices that gave us hope and joy all turned off?

What would you do if you were given a list of skill points to choose from?

What would you do if giant rifts apeared in the sky and creatures from other worlds started to invade earth?

 

Helping me with feedback will make it so that you can help with the story. I hope to not end it for a long time.

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  • Ratings :
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  • Pages :
  • 192
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mekogekk

mekogekk

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OOOHSpookyGhost
Overall

Good start but way too many characters introduced way too quickly. I'm having a hard time following what's happing to who and where anyone is in relation to each other.

Havoc the Younger
Overall

I give it give it 5 stars for the same reasons as GNARLYTREEMAN. And I must admit, at first, I was of the same mind as OOOHSPOOKYGHOST. However, as I continued reading the pattern came together, similar to the way Steven Eriekson's  (I think I spelled his name wrong) Malazan books of the Fallen.

 

I applaud you and I truly hope to read more of your work, probably like everyone else,  I'd love to read about the rise of Kevin. Even further,  I want to see the growth of these heroes, who don't even believe themselves to be what everyone knows they are. 

ZekromZZ
Overall

Has lots of potential but at this point the story is very confusing. There is not even an attempt to clarify POV you can be reading from one characters POV one sentence and another's the next with no indiction of the change. 

jadecriminal
Overall

Good premise but difficult to read and keep track of.

Edit: It was pointed out to me that this quick review does not contain constructive criticism and might come off as harsh. I may at a later date edit this further. I stand by rating this at "medium or mediocre" quality. Not bad, but not excelent either.

I'll try to keep things brief:

This would almost immedeately go on my favorites bookmark list for the premise if the execution was better.


If you don't read the chapter title, you can't tell who the first person you are reading about.

I was curious to see how people were reacting to things and aside from "people left cities" we don't get much. I understand that the author wanted to get on with it and get to adveturing but it's people and communities that make a story.


Unforrtunately I would have to judge this just average.

gnarlytreeman
Overall

Fantastic fiction writing.  Not for the faint of heart, accurately describes fear heartbreak, and misery truly in the face of a fantasy world.  I have been waiting for a creative person who can do this, please by all means write more.