Saga of the Overgod

by Heaven Dream

A mediocre young man is walking back home after selling from the market. Unexpectedly, He encounters an injured man and then he treats him with the help of his relatives. The man offered him the chance of being a cultivator as a payment for his help.

But in the world of cultivation, dangers are lurking everywhere, fights are inevitable. Cultivators are struggling to find themselves a way to get even more stronger. 

How will he survive in this merciless, violent and irrational world where conflicts always arose and strenght rules the world. With his passion, dedication and also his capable mind he will try to dominate other beings and reach the place where gods resided.

 

Editor: afanficaddict

 

 

   

 

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Heaven Dream

Heaven Dream

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sinkingship
Overall

Reviewed up to chapter 6--

So I've not read any wuxiaworld type stuff and this story draws pretty heavily from that sort of thing as inspiration. That said it's a very comprehensible story even without knowing much about the genre. The characters all behave in believable ways and Farjan gets swept up in cultivation without it feeling overtly forced by the author - which is nice compared to how it goes in some stories. 

The pace is a bit too quick here and there though I think, some stuff that could be fleshed out a bit gets glossed over in a line or two, and there are some minor punctuation and grammar snags that mostly smooth out by the latest chapter. It's always readable but occasionaly there are issues with tense useage and extraneous punctuation.

The quality of the writing varies a bit, sometimes it feels too stiff - or like too much is being said too quickly - but there are a lot of points where it shines, which is why I've rated so highly. The comedy is fun and the jokes mostly land. Plus the imagery that gets employed - especially in the first chapter - really got me hooked on the story. Three suns indeed.

 

All in all it stands very well on it's own as a story, I'll look forward to seeing what happens next.

SeafoodFirst
Overall

Hey still reading your fics :) 

q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q q

Kazushi Tetsuo
Overall

I don't read very many Wuxia, but from what I read from this maybe I should. The world and characters are pretty interesting. The grammar could use the work though but all in all, it was fine. Keep at it!

FlowingTime
Overall

The story itself is a gem, I got pretty hooked into it from how Farjan's personality is which was a nice change to some of the darker stories around. Grammar needs some work but I that will only improve as you keep reading and writing so no problems there. 

Overall great start and its a fun story to read! 

ArcanePunkster
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

It's Good, But There's Room For Improvement

Firstly I just want to begin with by saying that I like the concept that you have here, as well as the direction you're taking this in. Along with the heavy emphasis on lore that you have created to go with this story makes feel truly unique. (FYI I read up to Chapter 5!)

However there are a few improvements you can make that I'll list below.

I've noticed occasionally simple grammar mistakes for nstance refering to female characters with 'his' or 'he' and vice versa. Along with noticing from time to time words that break the flow of the sentence. I suggest proofreading or if you don't have time ask a friend or family member to do so for you.

There also seems to be a lack of world building in your story, and my third point sort ties into this. But it seems you're trying to direct this story at a more Asian demographic (I've perceived your story as a light novel so I'm sorry if I got it wrong!) which is all well and good, but on the other hand when publishing it on a website like this where it's an American centric website sort of throws people off from your writing style. Just a few sentences here and there just describing the scenery or the interactions between characters physically can surprising bring a lot more to your story, along with bringing a sense of relation between characters and readers.

My last point sort of ties in with my previous one, I feel there's a lot of missed out segments between chapters it feels like you're trying rush into writing your more exciting chapters which isn't a problem, but it sort of left me disjointed between scenes and chapters because of the sudden change.

Obviosuly though I've seen others that have reviewed, and they don't seem to have the same issues that I find so you don't have to my opinions seriously if you feel that way. However I wish you luck and keep up the good work!

SamPenn
Overall

Seems pretty promising

Its a good story, with a nice premise. The grammar needs polishing here and there but overall its a good read

Pandashta
Overall

I am just amazed by how you got the inspiration to write this magnificent story, keep up I'll cheer for you!

FireFistasce
Overall

I like the story setting and the story itself because the topic is unique as their arent many novels out their similar to this one Nice job.

P.s LOVE THAT DAZAI PROFILE PICTURE

Venom 1309
Overall
Style
Story
Grammar
Character

I'm up to date and i have to say.... i enjoy the hell of it and is the genre isekai or? 

Story: The story is gripping, i couldn't stop reading until i know it was past noon. That a sign of great story telling! but the pacing could have been better IMO

Characters: Is too early to judge the characters but what I've read so far, the characters acted the way the author attended it to be, nothing special but interesting enough to catch my attention.

Style and grammar: I notice one or none grammar errors but the writing style can be a bit too quick, like there a missing word to slow it down but it not entirely bad and the jokes are funny enough to make me chuckle from time to time.

 

Overall a good story that deserves some praise and it will probably stand out in a couple of more chapters.