- Sexual Content
After ascending from his last life to become a Champion our hero has his memories locked. He is told that he must compete in competitive simulations against other Champions in order to earn enough to continue to simulate his consciousness. The competitive simulations have a variety of scenario genres, and may or may not have a game interface.
The first competitive simulation our hero faces is from the Summoned Hero/Traveller to a New World genre, and is set as Fantasy Realistic - no game interface. He must ensure that the person he chose in the simulation's setup survives the end of the world in order to win.
Author's note: I'm committing to one arc of four books. The arc has its own complete storyline. And each book has its own individual storyline as well. Each book also has 60 chapters, for a total commitment of 240 chapters. I'm aiming for a release schedule of a chapter every 23 hours.
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A seemingly base-building centred story turns into an action packed (kind of) OP-MC novel, with a side of romance - all while flowing pretty much perfectly and without annoying plot holes.
The building and developing is very well described and comprehensible, although I personally would have liked a little more focus on him coding his programs. On another note, I really enjoy the fact that you set up rules for your world and seem to actively try and have your MC work around them using knowledge/inspiration from this world.
The characters are solid and consistent, and I very much like the MCs personality, but I find Chantelle to be kind of... lacking. She is just so one dimensional in her (inter)actions, and I feel like some more focus would have done her good - especially in the earlier chapters.
The grammar and spelling are pretty much perfect, I have only found a handful of errors in over 500 pages so that should speak for itself.
I am looking forward to seeing this story grow further, and I hope that you will continue it for a while. Cheers, drizz.
This novel brings a lot of concepts together: a universe dominated by AI hungry for processing cycles, a litrpg fantasy world that is the playground for earning said cycles through a hunger games style bid for followers that rewards interesting actions over easy ones, and a MC who's first instinct is to turtle up and build a fortress. Eventually, a very complex fortress with many amneties and filled with people of various species.
Of course, this novel would be terribly boring if the MC could have his way. Fortunately, the world doesn't let him turtle. Not only is the world ending in god driven heat death, the followers of that god are also actively murdering and pillaging everything in their path. Plus the MC's growth/actions result in ever increasing objective difficulty. A balanced OP'ness in a way.
My only complaint: Chantelle needs better integration into this story. I think some more POV sequences from her would help with this. As it is, I feel like she just fades into the background.
BTW: if you liked the Black Coven series bythen you should definitely try this.
and also there will be some "bring science to the medieval " moment here ,right now there are not much chapter so I will review it again
edit:the first 4 chapter is a bit wall of text for information,but after that the story begin,and I think the first 12 chapter maybe just about how he survive in nature before get in contact with other civilization
edit:after chapter 15,We're coming out of the setup and into the response (first quarter of the book released).
By this point you should have somewhat an idea as to how the story is working,and btw he may need a editor a bit so he can forcus in writing more
edit:at chapter 19,here come the base building that you guy want here ,and will be more and begin to the town stage at later chapter
edit:cool,look like the author do make a more detail of the people here (small spoiler: he humanising what used to be the faceless citizens of the Winter God's city,and not everyone who not locked up over there was inherently evil,even some winter priests are not evil),this from chapter Chapter 51
edit:damn,that a lot of heat up and cliff hanger here (from chapter 29 to 56 here),but at least it cooled down now (and in that part,that one hell of pain and fight he have to go though here,not sure it is equal to or more pressure than the mc in arcade emperor here)
edit:onward the chapter 61,finally the fight settle down and the base/town building finally go back now
It is rare to find something unique in the litrpg genre, it is getting pretty bloated.
This one manages it though. It steps away from the usual system of levels and statistics, placing the MC in a very powerful starting position in return for setting a nearly impossible goal.
The base building starts interesting, and actually manages to get better as he begins to form the core of a game System, with himself as the originator. This leads to a lot of unique events, such as designing quests and rewards.
About the only downside to this story is the shallow nature of a few of the core characters. One of the two primary characters, Chantelle, comes off a bit two dimentional, turning up to drop exposition about her abilities or to sleep with the main character then shuffled off out of the way. There is little character depth or growth there, which is dissapointing.
Other characters also seem to be very similar in personality. Even vastly different races and species seem to share very similar behaviors, modified exclusively by their biological needs.
Still, these are very minor issues in an otherwise near perfect tale. And the issues are lessened under the assumption that this is just the first of many 'scenarios' the character will face.
if you said yes to ether one or nether one you should give this story a try, we need to make sure the MC lives and we need YYYYYOOOOOUUUUUU!!!!!
But really its a pretty good story and you should give it a try.
Gotta say, I really like this story. It has a good balance between an intelligent MC and an overpowered one. So far, the MC has dominated conflict, but I doubt that will last very long.
It will be tricky for the author to avoid exponential growth, and the MC becoming overpowered. However, there are already things in place that the author can draw upon to limit that.
This looks like a fairly well thought out story, with a minimum of grammatical flaws or plot holes.
Haven't really seen anyone other than the MC yet, but so far everyone acts consistent with their motivations. (Except chapter 13, that came out of nowhere.)
Please keep writing!
The mc have power who seem nerferd from the start but with is smart he is able to find way to become strong.
Frankly for those who want a story with a op mc from the start this might not be for you but if you like story like artos imperium(on royal road) or the DANIEL BLACK series where the mc is smart and don't just go like a xanxia mc but his style badass then this story is for you.
As of ch 19 you can say that the story really began around ch 11 since it where he meet an important character. Is power show is true might by ch18. The story is a little slow but the pacing is logical and it far better than most story i read on RR
The mc even though smart know few thing in the new world and is a huamn so he make mistake but he learn from them and become better each time
This seems to draw heavy inspriation from The Daniel Black series. Now, that certainly isn't a bad thing, but while I like that series I don't think that does a particularly good job of characterization, and this does it worse.
When Chantelle's town gets captured and for all she knows, killed, she starts seducing the MC the next day and basically acts as if nothing happens? I'm sorry, but that is just absurd.
If you want those two to have sex, the better way to do it is to have her break down crying, the MC comfort her, and sex happen then. Have it be comfort and I am trying to forget all that bad shit that has happened sex instead of I am going to flirt and seduce you sex.
After that, she becomes the Warder that the MC needs to protect and is there for flirty sex action.
An easy way to fix this is to have some chapters from her perspective. I mean, the MC told us that he had some deep emotional bond with this person from a previous life, but that is not apparent AT ALL. And saying that there is a deep emotional bond is not enough for the characters to have one. We actually need to see it in their thoughts, dialogue and action.
If you are going to have some super OP on task person who is driving the plot forward, at least have the other characters there to carry the emotional weight and make the ready care about the MC and his story. Daniel Black basically turned the female characters into distinct harem sex toys. You didn't even do that. With some work, you can definitely do better.
Now, maybe this gets better after chapter 30, but I had to give up at that point out of boredom. I honestly skimmed the last 10 chapters as well, so it could get better.
I stopped before this, but I did not like how you got the new tenents. It felt like the druid monkey and your MC was making some bland transaction. The problem is, is that there was no real relationship built up for the druid monkey to actually trust the MC.
It was un-earned and too fast.
You could have gone the sheer desperation route and really sold that these people had zero other options and the druid monkey's only option was the MC, but if that was your intent, you did not sell that well at all.
Another issue that I had is that after the MC starts going into serious base-building mode, it doesn't really feel earned. There is no real struggle. He just creates a big bad base with a lot of techno-mumble jumbo that honestly bored me to tears. I struggled to visualize what your base actually looked like because of all that extra AI technical mess. I mean, I still am not sure why an AI gives the MC basically unlimited powers. I probably skimmed over the explanation, but that just doesn't make a lot of sense.
You do a good job of the main character earning what he created in the beginning when he had yet to get his final power. He struggled, he failed, he had to try again to find new solutions, he experimented, and what he created wasn't super OP.
Daniel Black is a super OP character, but even that story shows a plausible progression. He slowly improves his craft, going from underground tunnels, to town tower and walls, and finally a base that slowly builds up over time. You seem to go from crappy hole in the ground to super base with nothing in between.
I think this story has some serious potential. The beginning chapters are legimitely good, but then you rush it and try to put all of the stuff you liked about Daniel Black, the awesome base-building, ally gathering, and weathering the apolcolpyse and its enemies; and sacrifice plausible progression and characterizaiton.
Nothing feels earned and none of the characters feel like actual people. I can't get excited about how the MC builds an awesome base filled with allies because I just don't buy it. I can't care about the characers because your characters don't have the motivations, goals, emotions and reactions of actual people. They are plot devices instead of actual characters.
You need to at least do one of the two well. Daniel Black does the base building well, but does a rather poor job of characterization due to the power fantasy harem nature of it all, but I was still entertained by the story.
I love the whole base-building genre and think this story does have a lot of potential. Just make sure that things feel earned and that the characters feel like actual people.