The Orphan Fox
by Ancient Sage
Arin, an 8 years old boy, grew up as an orphan in Switzerland. Thanks to the Orphanage he lives in he could count as a lucky child. Sadly his legs were weak which could already be called completely crippled. Understanding his situation he still tries to do his best and uses his hands to craft all kinds of different objects. One day, just as he was about to join the other kids in a game in the garden, an event occurs that send him and the other on a Trip, none of them would easily forget.
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The story and everything is good I enjoy it. The only real problem I can find is a few plot holes, bad grammar/spelling, and a few things to clear up.
for the grammar/spelling the problems make it kind of hard to read or understand what you mean but that is easily fixable by finding a proofreader or just paying attention to spelling a little bit more. You could also try typing the chapters on google docs or Microsoft word first because both services offer spelling corrections.
Really the main other thing you could fix is the use of mp in the early chapters without explaining. You use the abbreviation mp multiple times without explaining it until around the 10th chapter. Which can be confusing because mp can stand for multiple things. So if you could just add in parentheses the words magical power or something similar that would help your story quite a bit.
But this is all just advice do what you think is best. Thanks for writing it.
Great story. Grammar needs a little work. Everything else is great.
Nice pleasant stor I'm enjoying the read thankyou
Wonderfully written well placed and with a nice side of fluffy scenes. Lots of grammar issues but the story overall is good. Mainly just want to say Absolutely no harem. It doesn't suit his personality. His more of a single partner type of a guy. Unless u Decide to put in a girls who is pushy, or simply can't take the hint that they aren't liked that way (who i find to be the most annoying) I don't think it would work out well. Plus 90 of books get ruined because they try to put in harem. So please don't since I really love ur book.instead what about giving those other kids partners in some of the side stories as they grow up if people don't think that there is not enough romance in the story later. So if u do romance later on for the main character make it a good strong woman who can really give him the support he needs rather than multiple people. Honestly he doesn't have to have a romantic interest just best friends who will support and grow with him. Any I'm done thank you for ur hard work and keep going!!!!!😁
My review is called "slow but steady" because the story progresses pretty slow, but because of the writing style and the characters, it's fun to read!
I really like how this author writes. Even though the story is quite slow, I am really enjoying it. That is because of your writing style: slow, but a nice fun read.
Your grammar is for a new author on RoyalRoadL truly on point. even if there are mistakes, you make the time to repair them if pointed out in the comments. All with all, very good without having a proofreader.
I really like the story. The Idea of a boy who is sucked into another dimension, but without staying a human is really fun to read(and that without getting a Re: Monster story!). I also really like how he was crippled at first, but how he now can go faster than most humans can see.
For me, is this where the author truly shines. The MC has a good personality for his age and form. Same goes for Uncle Black (I like that character so much!). The MC isn't progressing too fast nor too slow, but just at a nice reading speed.
Long story short: I really like your fiction and I can't wait to read more chapters!!! (The waiting torture has begon!)
Don't write too many chapters too fast, because stories tend to drop quality and/or go on a HIATUS then...
This review was written after chapter twelve.
Grammer was on point and was well done for an author on Royal Road. THe characters feel distinct with good personality thaat makes them feel alive and I like how the characters react to the problems they are forced to deal with. I enjoy the story and can't wait to see more of his adventures and the people we'll meet. Keep up the good work and know that you have another fan along for the ride.
Very bad grammar and spelling. Very hard to read because of this.
No real character development at all. MC is a one dimensional person. All he does is cry with the maturity level of an infant as opposed to the 8 year old orphan he is supposed to be. The dragon and fox girl echo are nothing more than, oh I love and will protect you poor orphan you are now my family.
The MC is op and there is nothing wrong with that but its delevered in a way that doesnt flow, more of like a writers fantasy given as an info dump. Lets train, boom super ability to train in anything so quick that it makes elder dragon go "damn you awesome" Here is cliche evil chick with evil blood sacrifices, boom instant immunity after a quick cry.
I like the random dimensional portal idea but nothing else makes this worth reading.