The Chaos Immortal

by nanda322

Original HIATUS Adventure Comedy Fantasy Romance Male Lead Martial Arts Slice of Life Strong Lead Wuxia

Before the beginning of time, there was chaos. Or rather that was how many thought. The one being that knew the entirety of the matter did not have the thought to correct this. He would rather observe everything in silence.


One day, due to boredoom, he decided to personally experience the universe. He has experienced all yet he is a complete novice at the same time. Read about the epic (or not) adventure following our hero on his adventure.


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  • Pages :
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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Prologue ago
Chapter 1 - First Encounter ago
Chapter 2 - Long Xue'er ago
Chapter 3 - Leaving the Forest ago
Chapter 4 - Cultivator City ago
Chapter 5 - Cultivator City (2) ago
Chapter 6 - Date with Xue'er ago
Chapter 7 - Renting a Cave Mansion ago
Chapter 8 - Shen the Cook ago
Chapter 9 - Soaring Phoenix Auction House ago
Chapter 10 - Little White ago
Chapter 11 - Auction (1) ago
Chapterr 12 - Auction (2) ago
Chapter 13 - Cultivation ago
Chapter 14 - Speechless Xue'er ago
Chapter 15 - Xiao Yan ago
Chapter 16 - The Competition ago
Chapter 17 - The Tradition ago
Chapter 18 - End of the First Stage ago
Chapter 19 - I'm on a boat! ago
Chapter 20 - First Blood ago
Chapter 21 - Blue Cloud City ago
Chapter 22 - Taking a Mission ago
Chapter 23 - Venturing into the Forest ago
Chapter 24 - Friends ago
Chapter 25 - Sword Arts ago
Chapter 26 - Sparring ago
Chapter 27 - Soul Formation ago
Chapter 28 - Breakthrough! ago
Chapter 29 - Poison Mist Valley ago
Chapter 30 - Lucky? ago
Chapter 31 - Unusual Atmosphere ago
Chapter 32 - Prelude to the Storm ago
Chapter 33 – The Enemy of My Enemy is a Friend? ago
Chapter 34 - It's a Trap! ago
Chapter 35 - Back to the Forest ago
Chapter 36 - Long Tian's struggle ago
Chapter 37 - Space Traveller ago
Chapter 38 - Cultivators in Space ago
Chapter 39 - Purchasing a Weapon ago

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AMAZING PREMISE, lots of potential, only problems I can see are

1. Characters are too shallow/weak. they feel rushed and without any real character.

2. the story is definetly rushed, each chapter so far feels like you crammed 3 or more chapters into one with how empty the descriptions are and how rushed it all feels.

other than those issues, i like the premise, feels like it could be amazing. but needs work.

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The first guy stole my title so...

I like your story, quite a lot honestly, but like stated before super rushed, I feel that because your chapters are short you feel like something worthy of a chapters worth of experience should have occured. Though with your length of chapters you either cram it together and rush it or you write more in detail and it feels like the story goes no where which leaves you stuck, so my advice is either release the same length chapters and go into more detail but release them more often, or write longer chapters that go into proper details of events and scenery less frequently.

( Though me and the other guy agree that it feels rushed dont try to forcefully change that instantly or rewrite or something like that it's a gradual process to prefect writing skills and im guessing that is why you're here to practice.) 

- P.S I dont want you to rewrite because im selfish and don't want to wait for you to release enough chapters to catch back up LOL