The story of a girl who finds her life is not what she wanted. So she gets another one.
Schedule: Story has been completed.
Book One is available free on Amazon and EPUB.
Books Two to Five are out now. Final Book out soon.
Chapters will be around 500-1000 words. This will not change so if you don't like reading very short chapters wait till the end of the week or even end of the month. This many chapters a week isn't easy to pull off so please bear that in mind.
This is a VRMMORPG story, but the ones I've read tend to use VR as an excuse to get into a fantasy world and then don't really play up the game aspect other than pulling up a status screen every now and then. To me, MMOs are about more than the fantasy setting.
Bugs, exploits, devs who don't understand their own game, OP classes, over the top nerfs, p2w, ridiculous RNG, cash shop fiasco, lockboxes, raging players, broken mechanics, limited bag space, tedious crafting and above all that, a company trying to squeeze money out if its playerbase while pretending they're just in the business of having fun.
Of course, then there's the orcs and elves.
This story is about finding yourself in a completely immersive fantasy game, but it's also about what a game like that would really be like.
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I'm trying to find a way to describe how I feel about this fiction. I probably won't find a proper one, but I'll have a go.
'Bitter' describes a life of a less-than-popular high-school girl who enjoys dishing out the treatment she herself endures. It's eerily reminiscent of real life, in both good ways and bad. Add in a VR to the mix, and you have yourself a story.
Update: I went and read the entire story, all 594 chapters (currently) of it.
To say that the story is infuriating would be an understatement. It's meant to annoy the reader. The main character is baffling. She always tries to take the easy way out, then somehow gets rewarded by it.
But that's the beauty of the story. The main character is baffling. The world baffles more around her. Together, they both compliment and contradict each other, playing a game of cat and mouse.
The storyline is fluid. Small events producing large outcomes, small storylines converging onto a larger scope.
The style of the story is quick, easy, and at least as addictive as the game in the story, if not more. Prepared in bite-sized chunks, you don't want to stop until you overeat.
Minor grammar errors, nothing important.
Flawless victory for mooderino.
Quite the enjoying read. One downsize though: Chapters are quite short and feel even shorter, as quite some slow-paced. So after devouring a chapter in a rush it is already over and when you try to call back what happened you cannot name much.
So it might not be for you if you are a slow reader and want action in every sentence badly.
Otherwise prepare to be unable to stop reading till there are no more chapters and crave for more once you reached the end. (That's not very dangerous with the 13 chapters out now but once there are more better only start reading if you have enough time).
Bitter is a strange experience. The amount of complaining of the MC is hard to deal with, but I gave up when she decides to party up with a psycho daddy-boy who did nothing but threaten and make life for her miserable.
Well, there isn't much I can say about this story. It takes an overused trope and somehow manages to create something new and exciting. There are secrets everywhere and the suspension building which is created by the last sentence in each chapter is definitely a plus. But, I feel the author revealed the backstory a bit too early. So there's that.
The score isn't 5/5 because nothing is perfect, and to encourage the author to find new ways to improve himself/herself/Apache helicopterself.
So I've managed to read this to chapter 12. But at this point I just can't stand the MC anymore. As someone who was bullied as a teenager I can understand bitterness and the resulting cynicism pretty well. The issue is the MC goes far beyond this. Her bitterness is a black-hole that has swallowed all personality and all good that may have been in her.
I can't say anything about the story/plot itself since I stopped reading before any plot got started. I'm not sure if there's actually going to be one. It might just be a slice of life bitter-bitch plays VR game she hates because she's antagonised everyone in her RL environment.
The language and grammar seems good so far. I can't complain about the technical writing.
The main issues are the characters. Yeah teenagers are usually nasty arseholes, but the way these people are characterised you just want to kill them all. It's not a good thing when the author makes you hate the MC more than the antagonists. A MC should be more than just self-hate, hate for other humans and hate for the world in general. She despises everyone she meets. The one friend she has is as toxic as she is. And then she has the the gall to whine about how nobody likes her, when the venom is figuratively dripping out of her ears.
I'm not sure if persons like this exist in real life, she seems more a carricature than anything else. A person that hates themself and the world that much would have likely ended themselves long ago. If she was a guy she'd be a prime candidate for a school shooting.
That's the main failing of this story imho. I don't actually want to get into this character. There seems nothing redeemable about her. She's already lost. The way you can sort of get where she's coming from also means you can't really enjoy her failings. There isn't anything funny about this story, there isn't anything uplifting about this story. There isn't even the irony of a tragedy.
In a way this is great art. You've truly created a lost soul. She may have gotten a hard deal from life, but she's gone out of her way to damn herself. To destroy her life and drown in bitterness. If there's beauty in life she can't see it. If there's hope she can't feel it. If there's justice she can't taste it.
In a way this is great art, but I'm sorry, I can't enjoy it.
Brilliantly well done. The grammar and professionalism of the writing is an amazing refresher given the usual fare on this and similar websites.
Obviously when the MC isn't a gamer and doesn't think like one, parts can be frustrating to read, but the characterisation is pretty amazing. If I hadn't read any of the author's other stories I'd be pretty convinced they were drawing from experience and had to be a ~15yo girl.
It suffers a little from the lack of overarching plot in places, but at the time of reading, that seems mostly resolved, and is worth sticking with for sure.
Give it a read.
Spoiler-Free Review (as of ch. 93)
The story unfurls slowly, but quickly draws in the reader. It follows the day-to-day life of a high-school girl, tying together VR, teenage drama, and life. Unlike almost every other stories on this site, there is nothing special about the girl. Also unlike almost every other story on this site, readers can probably relate to at least some of the protagonist's circumstances, creating a bittersweet narrative that is emotionally vesting.
There is no solid overarching story (as of yet), but there hints building up to one throughout the novel. The style itself is simplistic, but easy to read. The chapters are released frequently, but are also very short. There are no real issues with the grammar.
Great slice of life of a teen who's curiosity gets her reluctantly tied to a VR game. Britta's deals with various game characters and players in a fairly interesting manner. Really well fleshed out MC(though it's done over a long period of time). The other characters aren't as well fleshed out but it's all from a slightly overwhelmed 16 year old girl's perspective. They are all well written though. Decent grammer, nothing ever really jumped out at me. Would really like to see this continue, even if it's just a few compressed chapters showing the character dealing with her new paradigm and the changes and planned direction for the game. I am currently enjoying Deeper Darker(a Lot!) and will be starting on the authors other works once this is posted.
A fun slice of life vrmmo story. Worth the read
This remains my favorite web fiction.
I can't say it any more strongly after reading it start to today.